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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To have refused to let them use a ouija board in my house

234 replies

FrankWelker · 07/01/2015 12:19

We had some friends over for new year and one night they got out a ouija board. I'm scared off them (never done one so don't know why) and point blank refused to let them play it in my house (nicely). I was telling my cousin about this today and she said I'm a right wuss! I know it's my house and I can refuse but do other people have the same kind of fear with this sort of thing?

OP posts:

nooka · 09/01/2015 07:20

The year above me at school had a major issue with bullying using a ouija board (suspensions and maybe even an expulsion or two). For that reason as well as the fact that I think it would be a thoroughly crap 'game' I would have said 'no thank you' too. The only fear I would have had was that someone would almost certainly start pushing the glass around out of boredom or mischief and then I suppose we'd all have to believe that something was happening, which would have been embarrassing at the very least.

Hakluyt · 09/01/2015 08:31

Dustarr- at about the same age, maybe a year or so younger, some friends and I convinced ourselves (looking back, I can remember the girl who started the story) that if we took some of the green chippings from a particular grave in the local church yard, we would raise ghosts. I was the youngest and most gullible, and was deputed to steal the chippings. One of the group then appeared to go into a trance and spoke in a very scary voice, until we all panicked, threw the chippings back on the grave and ran away. I was utterly terrified, and I can still remember bursting into the kitchen at home, and the blessed relief it was to find everything normal and warm and smelling of home made cake. I can see the kitchen and my mother and smell the cake now! If I had a different sort of brain I could easily and honestly recall that as a real ghostly encounter. But what it was was Shani Rendell with too much intelligence, imagination and leadership ability and not enough to do with it. I do hope she put it to good use in later life!

Hakluyt · 09/01/2015 08:33

Sorry- I missed out the bit about the "spirit" telling us that one of our mothers had died that afternoon.

Hakluyt · 09/01/2015 09:39

Another anecdote.nwhen I was very small (i don't remember this) I was terrified of a "green man" in a room in our house, and wouldn't go in and always wanted the door to th room shut. My parents were, against their better judgement, a bit spooked, until one day one of them got down to my level, and saw the splash of green paint on the wall under a shelf which looked like a man's face. Again- that could easily over the years a full on family ghost story.......

SIMPLESAM · 09/01/2015 09:49

I have one, nothing happens unless you push it, so boring.

aermingers · 09/01/2015 10:41

I don't know how the message that my friend would die in a car crash came out. As far as I'm aware she didn't die. It was probably not a message from the dead. It was probably someone either pushing it to deliberately scare her or a subconscious action on the part of the person pushing the coin.

But my point is that something nasty happened and it really scared her. There's no benefit to this kind of thing and it can cause serious upset to people involved.

I think some of the things people have said about things 'happening' in houses after a board's been used are a good example. I think these people had probably scared themselves to such a point where innocent things started to feel malevolent and possibly even to the point where their mind started to play a few tricks on them.

There's absolutely no point putting yourself into a situation where these kind of scares and upsets can happen for a silly pointless game.

dustarr73 · 09/01/2015 11:44

See i do believe that to a certain extent aermingers that we scared ourselves.But i wouldnt do it again because you dont know what you are messing with.To do this day i know what i seen and what i felt though.

Hakluyt · 09/01/2015 11:53

"To do this day i know what i seen and what i felt though."

So do I.

But neither of us actually do!

nunkspugget · 09/01/2015 13:31

Its all rather stupid though, that the demons or devils or wicked spirits are at once so weak that they need a pre packaged board game to communicate with the living, and then so powefull that once released they can possess houses, kill people etc. I'm embarrassed for you, it just so cringingly childish to behave like this. Next I'll be hearing that toys come to life at night...

HowCanIMissYouIfYouWontGoAway · 09/01/2015 13:34

I think it's all a load of crap but I do have a funny story.
When I was a teen, me and a friend had a go - we made a board ourselves.
i said - is there anybody there? knock once for yes and twice for no.

yes, you read that right. Just how thick WAS I? It made sense at the time

anyway, next thing, there's this almighty BANG. Me and my friend (Hi jools if you're reading ) screamed and ran downstairs.

Where we came face to face with my sister, broom in hand, and a massive dent in the kitchen ceiling.

capsium · 09/01/2015 14:20

Talking of anecdotes my own is that some girls in our year had been playing with a ouija board and came into school the next day very upset (I was not one of these girls). I remember the RE teacher having a word with them and warning to us all not to play with ouija boards but of course anything predicted was nonsense. Anyway the prediction did come true. Years later one of the girls died, as predicted, we planted a tree at school.

So yes, this puts me off. There are probably a million different explanations but I would not enjoy ouija as a game.

aermingers · 09/01/2015 14:57

Capsium, that school wasn't in South London was it?

capsium · 09/01/2015 16:08

No.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 09/01/2015 20:43

Capsium, can you elaborate at the prediction? I mean if it said one of you will die young of cancer then that is fairly likely to come true if it was a biggish group. "Young" could be interpreted as before the age of natural death.

If it was a very specific prediction eg Tracy (soecifically) will die in a car crash in her late teens and that was what actually happened then I can appreciate how scared that would make you feel. However most people would still claim it was an unfortunate coincidence and that there could have been any number of groups of teenage girls in the country playing with ouijia boards at that time, all of whom had a specific kind of "Tracy" prediction, none of which came true.

CurlyhairedAssassin · 09/01/2015 20:46

Also, Capsium, if it had "said" that "Tracy" would have a cursed life and would kill herself at 18, then an impressionable teenager who finds herself having difficulties in life (as many teens do) will have remembered that prediction, and it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

See, when I say we need specific full details of these ouija experiences, this is the sort of thing I mean.

ChocolateWombat · 09/01/2015 20:49

I think that whether you are religious or not and whether you believe in spirits etc or not, and especially if you're not quite sure what you think about all that stuff, steering well clear is a good idea.

No-one should assume that others want to get into that kind of stuff and people should appreciate that not everyone will see it as a harmless game.

I think you were right to say 'no' if you didn't like it. If they asked you to get involved in group sex and you don't like the idea, you'd say 'no'. It is always right to say 'no' to things you are not comfortable with and there is never an obligation to let others carry out the stuff in your own home either.

Hakluyt · 09/01/2015 21:08

"I think that whether you are religious or not and whether you believe in spirits etc or not, and especially if you're not quite sure what you think about all that stuff, steering well clear is a good idea."

I don't. I think that's just giving it credibility, and reinforcing the ridiculous stories people have been spinning about a party game since 1940. Play with it if you want, don't if you don't, but the best thing to do is laugh. It's all nonsense.

ChocolateWombat · 09/01/2015 22:01

Hak, but YOU think it is nonsense, so might feel like that.....you aren't bothered either way. But some people feel uncomfortable with it...the OP included. It isn't necessary for people to have to get involved in things they don't feel comfortable about. If the friends just thought it was a silly game, then they should have been willing to recognise that it made the OP feel uncomfortable.
Isn't this all about feeling comfortable in our own homes to say no to things we don't like and feel uncomfortable about? It doesn't matter if others think our lack of comfort is a bit silly or superstitious or daft.
And when we go to others' homes, shouldn't we be willing to accept their feelings about things like this, even if we do think they are daft. Aren't people due a bit of respect in their own homes?

capsium · 10/01/2015 08:13

Curly no I cannot elaborate on the specific prediction, as I said I wasn't there and wasn't told the specifics. I just remember a normally very bubbly, 'happy go lucky' girl coming into school so very upset - which was out of character. I found out from friends that it was her death that was predicted, from what I can remember at the exact age in years, after her death. She did not kill herself it was as the result of a road accident.

As I said there could be various explanations but that (and my Faith) means that I am extremely uneasy concerning ouija boards and I would not enjoy playing with them.

bigbluestars · 10/01/2015 08:17

capsium- your faith gives you fear.

It's a very effective way that the church has of exerting power and control.
Nothing like a bogey man to keep the children in line.

capsium · 10/01/2015 08:54

It is not a fear exactly, bigblue but yes some things do make me feel uncomfortable, in the sense I would not enjoy them or choose to do them. I don't generally think people should be saying 'yes' to every suggestion.

bigbluestars · 10/01/2015 08:59

capsium- but that is a bogeyman of your own making.
My father used to tell me of a character called Flannelfoot who would prowl around looking for children who wouldn't go to sleep.

Same thing.

CatCushion · 10/01/2015 09:09

Funny that, I find that my faith tends to release me from fears (of the supertatural) and gives me something to lean on when having to deal with risk. Before I had faith I was a lot less rational about things like ouija boards. Since then I've been absolutely certain that there's nothing in it. Some school friends invited me along to a séance with a ouija board and I politely declined because I didn't think our friendships would endure a bout of them trying to scare me. As it is, the friendships didn't endure anyway and they jumped to the conclusion that I was too scared anyway.
Then when Mr F and I were staying with friends, someone got out an old family ouija board and we decided to have a go. Well, none of us were really into it. Full daylight, no special effects. Tea and cake. There was a little movement but not really much, not enough to spell anything out. Perhaps we weren't into it enough!

capsium · 10/01/2015 09:12

BigBlue I already said, I don't fear I am merely exercising choice. If someone, somehow forced me to be present, whilst they were playing with the ouija, I would have no need to fear. However I would not engage or participate with the activity. My choice.

CatCushion · 10/01/2015 09:21

(^Mr F = DH)

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