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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be sleeping on the sofa and asking for kind words...

46 replies

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses · 01/01/2015 05:20

Just awoken to the sound of DH being v sick in the en suite.
I am quite badly emetophobic and I'm now terrified.
I feel awful for him - he's hardly ever ill and I've never seen him catch much more than a cold in the past.

I'm ashamed to say I stood at the bathroom door afterwards, threw a pack of antibacterial wipes in and supervised him cleaning everywhere he'd been :(

I'm too scared to sleep next to him so I'm on the sofa. I'm desperate for a wee but daren't use the bathroom (the other isn't working) so I'm considering the garden but it's blowing a gale.

I wish I could just handle stuff like this like normal people :(

OP posts:
ChippingInLovesChristmasLights · 01/01/2015 05:29

Oh poor you :(

A bucket?

Do you have any nappies in the house? (You'll need 2, don't ask how I know! Oh and I don't mean wear them, just wee into them), or something disposable like an old takeaway container, or something washable like a towel you can put straight into the washing machine.

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses · 01/01/2015 05:50

Yes 2 DC still in nappies. I don't think I dare try that though Blush

I've left the baby in there with him as I didn't want to wake her.

I'm also freezing as all the spare duvets are in there because we've been decorating the spare room.

I know I'm being so so silly but I can't help it :(

OP posts:
BlessThisMess · 01/01/2015 05:53

Ah, you have my sympathy. I would feel the same in the circs. I jab to try hard to control my thoughts. I try and repeat to myself "whatever happens, I can handle it", "I can stay calm and deal with this" and the like. But it takes its toll and I hate feeling like that.

My DH hasn't been ill for years, but if it's any consolation I have never caught a bug my children have had because I am so careful about the hygiene when they're ill.

BlessThisMess · 01/01/2015 05:54

That should say 'I have to try hard ...'

TurnOverTheTv · 01/01/2015 06:00

Pee in a saucepan

ChippingInLovesChristmasLights · 01/01/2015 06:05

You aren't being silly. I have no idea what help you can get for it (but having a child I'd be finding out!) but right now, you feel what you feel.

You need to dash in to the bedroom to get a duvet or into DD's room (if she has one) to grab a blanket or something, even a couple if towels if your linen cupboard is in the hall way? Coats? Climb into bed with the other child?! Something to get warm.

I've done the weeping into a nappy a few times. Only made the mistake of thinking one would do once though! Tins, tubs, buckets, all kinds of things. It's really not difficult. Else hold your nose and pee in the loo quickly??

ChippingInLovesChristmasLights · 01/01/2015 06:06

God no, not in a saucepan! Urgh.

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses · 01/01/2015 06:09

I'm freezing and I need a wee :(

And I feel so bad that this is going to be all about me when he's the one that's ill and needs looking after :(

OP posts:
Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses · 01/01/2015 06:11

Thanks chipping but I just don't think I could do it! Can't be that desperate then I suppose

OP posts:
ChippingInLovesChristmasLights · 01/01/2015 06:16

Nope, if it's 'Oh I can't do that' then you don't need to wee that badly.

DH is an adult, he'll be fine. Plenty of people live on their own,. Just keep the kids out of his way and let him have some peace tomorrow if he's still feeling rough.

Have you found anything to keep you warm?

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses · 01/01/2015 06:23

Found duvet and weed in garden. Commotion has woken toddler. Just listening anxiously at the monitor.

I'm so silly.

OP posts:
Iggly · 01/01/2015 06:49

You've let this fear get out of hand. I hate being sick but have got better as the kids get older. What happens if your DCs get it and your DH isn't about?

Iggly · 01/01/2015 06:53

also you need to use bleach to clean not antibac as it will most likely be a virus. Anti bac is useless

Purplepoodle · 01/01/2015 07:42

I was exactly the same until OH started working away and I had 3dc with a vomiting bug. My saviour is a nose clip, Iv discovered if I can't smell it then it's tolerable. Can't sleep next to OH though if he's vomiting too much chance of grossness - I'd climb in bed with one of our dc

ChoochiWoo · 01/01/2015 08:07

without being mean, I cant believe you made DH clean afterwards without offering him some water or something..

CrohnicallyCold · 01/01/2015 08:13

I'm also emetophobic, but since starting antidepressants I've found it's lessened a lot. I also have diazepam prescribed for general anxiety, and just knowing I have it available reduces the number of panic attacks I have. So if you haven't already, it's worth going to the doctors to see if they can offer any help.

CrohnicallyCold · 01/01/2015 08:17

choochi if only it was that simple! I remember one time DH was sick and I very bravely approached to see if he was OK (when he'd finished of course!) only to see some of the sick and my legs buckled and I fell down the stairs. Poor DH ended up having to help me.

ChippingInLovesChristmasLights · 01/01/2015 08:19

I hope the toddler settled and you're all getting a little sleep now.

TheDailyWail · 01/01/2015 08:24

I feel for you. I can't deal with it either but I wouldn't say that I am emetophobic. I don't think i could have offered water either. Hope you're warm now.

FreeSpirit89 · 01/01/2015 08:29

I feel your pain my dh was sick once and I refused to go near him. Avoided the bedroom like the plague. I couldn't help it.

Buspirone helped me out, I got so bad I couldn't go out.

Hope you get some sleep x

Mammanat222 · 01/01/2015 08:38

I have a mild vomit phobia. Well I say mild but when OH and DS are sick I go into full on panic mode. Hate it.. it generally doesn't effect my day to day life but as soon as someone mentions feeling unwell its there.

I think the worse thing I've experienced was on holiday with an ex. He got D&V one night - came on v suddenly - and we were sharing a relatively small space. I slept on the balcony... in a tropical mozzie infested country. I also left him on his own next day (checked on him hourly though.... kept bringing him drinks etc)

Hope you got some rest and hubby is better soon.

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses · 01/01/2015 08:56

Thanks everyone.

Toddler up just after 6 and we watched a film on the sofa. Baby woke up about ten mins ago so just having a feed. DH still in bed which means he's still not feeling well (although he maintains he's fine and just are too much last night). He's trying not to worry me.

I do feel really bad about leaving him to it, but I just can't :(

OP posts:
haphazardbystarlight · 01/01/2015 09:01

I can't empathise but I don't understand how someone can be a parent and not deal with vomit?

Ifyourawizardwhydouwearglasses · 01/01/2015 09:11

Goodness only knows haphazard.

2 year old has only been sick once touchwood and baby only has milk. Milky upchuck I can deal with.

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PumpkinsMummy · 01/01/2015 09:13

I feel for you, try not to worry. I don't see what's so bad about having to clean up after yourself either. It's what I do every time I'm ill, why risk someone else catching your bug.? It is also much easier to clean your own sick ime than someone else's even if you are feeling rough. If you can manage leave him a glass of water and some ginger biscuits/dry toast in the room, and air it out a bit. He will be fine.