To be fed up of the criticism of those who splashed out for Christmas!

[Fanfeckintastic]

You can't open a thread about Christmas without someone voicing their dismay and horror that someone's eg "4 year old got an ipad", "that someone's partner gave them a tatty secondhand Christmas present and they should be grateful!", "you bought all that for a 5 year old "

It's mad because you'd never dream of criticizing the parents who had a minimalistic Christmas and bought very little for their DCs (like many of my Christmases) but somehow it's acceptable to be all judgy about people who splash out, with lots of raised eyebrows and sneeriness.

And how it's a mortal sin not to be overwhelmed with gratitude that your partner bought you anything at all. It's a really strange attitude that raises it's ugly head every year on here.

I totally agree with much of what you say. I used to judge people who bought a lot of presents at Christmas because I could remember my own childhood Christmases in which extravagant gifts were bought which were often sold in the new year. We often had a lot at Christmas but we did lack love. As an adult I can now see that my parents were simply trying to create a special say that was different to all the others. If I was skint I would get into debt to buy my children Christmas presents. However when you look at my own childhood it is not surprising that the focus of my Christmas is not presents . We spend a lot of money on Christmas but a small fraction of that goes on gifts. I spend money creating the kind of Christmas that I wish I had experienced as a child.

I love plastic tat for the kids. I tried artisanal wooden wank - the dc didn't like it so it was pointless trying to force it on them. Beautiful, but pointless and astonishingly heavy when used as a missile.

That sounds a lovely attitude Philoslothy. We try to take a similar approach and this year was a brilliant one. Hope yours was too :)

I don't even know what is meant by plastic tat. If it is judged on MN I susoect I have a house full of it.

Also agree that the you're-just-jealous argument is facile. If I wanted a bloody ipad, or thought my children had to have them, we'd jig things about to make it so.

Well it's usually lots of noisy, plasticky toys, with minimal perceived "educational value", mass produced, possibly flashing and usually garish in colour.

The kind all kids love.

My ds2 (6) is currently wafting around the front room with his new plastic lightsaber...making the sounds and everything.
He is playing a little game and chatting to an imaginary yoda.
It makes him happy.
And it makes me happy :)

Hilarious.

"Anyone who buys their kid an iPad is XYZ"

"I bought my kid an iPad"

"Oh, I didn't mean you personally"

Well, yeah you did, actually. You said "anybody" which means what it says. It's a personal attack against a lot of people all at once.

Want to be a spiteful cow behind your screen? Fine. At least have the backbone not to try and wiggle out of it by playing the "it's not personal" card.

movingonup that describes our whole approach to life, never mind just the children's toys.

P.s they do have tablets mind...Kindle Fires. Those work for games and youtube spelling and sums too, and keep my kids very well entertained educated.

We'll all go away from this thread thinking we're right anyway...so ho hum. Passes the time of day doesn't it?

I think some people do go over the top and kids getting enough toys to open their own toy shop is ridiculous.

I never leave a MN thread thinking that I got it right, I usually think there is something else I am doing wrong.

I quite often think that too - but I don't think anyone will be persuaded to the other side on this thread.

Oh good grief. Is that really a specific, actual post redefining the definition of what "personal" and "personally" mean?

I might just not bother posting words on this bizarre little thread. Just blank posts and let those who want to be offended fill in their own little message of hate. Let's not worry about what's actually been written, oh no!

Here you go:

_ _

OMG reading these posts and thinking I SHOULD have gig my four year old an iPad! He covets mine. Instead he got Flat Stanley, Mog's Christmas, a fake poo and Lego (is that plastic tat?) And when we sit in a car to drive four hours home he has to talk to me, look out the window or sleep on the journey. Why didn't I think of an iPad?!!

Gig - got.

Apple's autocorrect on my product ;-)

Jesus people go fucking mental on MN at this time of year. I was a member last year I'm sure but wasn't actively posting. This year has been eye opening.... agree about having a hiatus come November next year.

The amount of threads about Christmas cards was just lunacy. I think there was a thread for every single possibility (didn't address to my married name, addressed to mr and mrs Brown but I kept my maiden name, didn't name my kids individually, spelt my kids name wrong, only sent it 2nd class, sent it 1st class so it came too early etc etc)

Then we had the food threads ('I spent £1k on food' versus 'I eat roadkill') then we had the tree threads (real of course. I was the only mug who admitted to faking it) and lets not forget the MIL threads (and SIL - the women seem to be the issue at this time of year? )

I cant believe how nuts this place has been over the past few weeks?

Hoping it gets back to normal in early January?

We over spent on Christmas this year. But we also skipped our birthdays, put in extra hours, and picked up extra work to make it possible.

My floor is littered with all the toys and crap we got for baby DD. I would be pissed off if someone commented about it. We worked hard to have a big Christmas, as did most of our friends.

Though, I think next year we'll scale it back. I'm starting to see the down side of toys all over the house. She's never getting legos

For Christmas I tend to buy bits and pieces, stuff I think people will like, and I spend broadly what I can afford. Then I have a few drinks, Christmas lunch and a few chocolates. I might walk the dog and watch a film.

I never ask people what they think. I don't tend to tell people what I've bought. No one as far as I am aware gives a shit. So why do people post all over the Internet fretting? It's very odd.

Ok, I got most of the way through the thread before it got to me. And now I'll be accused of 'playing the SN card' but

My dd had an ipad when she was 5. It would have been when she was 4, but they weren't available .

She has used it (and the replacement - for upgrade purposes, not because it got broken) daily, and it has been invaluable.

She has learned so much from using it, and continues to do so. And yes, she learned to read. And no, she would not have done so by now (in all probability) without it. Scoff away. I know people have been learning to read for centuries before tablets were available. Not people like my dd. people like her were shut away, not allowed a voice, and not deemed worth educating. In fact, we had a hell of a fight to get it recognised that she was worth a 'suitable education', and part of our evidence was the fact we could prove progress via her ipad (handy thing with apps is they track progress).

I couldn't care less what people think about the fact that my children all have their own iPads (eldest is only 11, youngest is 2). I was that minimalist, worthy parent who didn't have shedloeads of presents for my children. And then I had dd1. And all my worthy wooden toys and no electronics etc went out of the window.

This year, dd1 got her presents, and didn't seem to like them. It can be so hard to get things she will be interested in, and which she can manage to play with. And she was very down, looking at her siblings enjoying all their new toys. I fetched another present I had in reserve (this was on Boxing Day, so after 2 days of presents already (European heritage)) due to buying a range of things in my guesswork and gave it to her. Just because. How's that for materialism and spoilt? But again, I couldn't give a shit. It worked for dd1, and that is what matters. It was more than worth it to see her happy and playing (and, FWIW, it was a naice wooden toy.)

But stop it with the ridiculing of the educational gains possible via iPads. Dd1 would not be anywhere near where she is today without one.

But don't pretend you're doing it for some speshul reason. You're doing it for the same reasons as everyone else - because you think your child will like it and for some of you also make your purchasing decisions because of the marketing hype. Pretending you needed to spend £500 on an iPad because it's educational is disingenuous. Just be honest!

Ok, being honest, fucking hate the word 'speshul' because it is usually used in a way to mock the term special needs, I am sure you didn't mean that but I am just being honest. Ds had an ipad via a grant when he was just 3, it has been great for helping him and entertaining him and calming him down. There is a reason why grants are given to disabled children to purchase ipads, and it is because it is a technology which is opening up areas which previously would have been closed to them (yes, like reading).

Ds is now 4 and 1/2, in the last year and a half he has become very adept at using the ipad and in the New Year will hopefully have funding awarded or a tablet that will be used as a communication device (he has no speech). For him, this will mean people not underestimating the fantastic understanding he has, people not putting words in his mouth, other children not understanding his signs, helping him to read and learn. So yes, some children really do need the technology of an ipad/tablet and benefit hugely from them.

I am really sorry, TheFairy, that is desperately sad.