To expect a thank you?

[Sn00p4d]

In the interests of full disclosure I'm 8 months pregnant and could quite possible be being a hormonal mess, it's not uncommon so entirely prepared to hear that iabu but...

I work in a place where I have a "team" of sorts, 4 people who work with me in close quarters, it's not an easy job and I'm not their manager, we have one of those!

I've had a very difficult pregnancy and they've been great, some more than others but they've all been accepting that I can't do parts of my role as well as I could pre pregnancy. I've been off work for the past six weeks due to complications and won't be returning to work before my mat leave as I'm too "high risk" now, so I popped in before Christmas with some presents for them, spent about £20 on each of them which is substantial for me as I don't have a lot of spare cash but I dont grudge it.

I haven't had a thanks/merry Christmas/acknowledgement from any one of them and I'm a bit miffed. I put a lot of though into the gifts and know they got them, haven't even had a fb message or anything and I'm a bit put out.

So am I being irrational and unreasonable given that they work really hard and it was as much a token of my appreciation as anything else? hit me with it

[BackforGood]

I agree with Ragwort. If people give you a gift, outside of the normal gift giving protocol (so family, maybe a close friend), or give a gift that has clearly cost a considerable sum of money, then it creates a certain amount of awkwardness - the old 'Should I have got them one?' 'Why are they giving me this' 'This must have cost a fortune' thing - it's the reason Secret Santa was invented, to keep the equilibrium.

[Sn00p4d]

Oh dear I seem to have fucked up royally then!
We do secret Santa but I missed it (off)
I didn't think being given a gift would cause offence though, I left it until the last minute so there was clearly no expectation that they reciprocate.
I won't be getting thank you notes as they wouldn't know my address but I agree its too soon for my miffed-ness and will wait and see what happens!
I
And to clarify, I popped in, was intercepted and the gifts taken off me by a senior manager to hand out in a sort of "thou shalt not pass" manoeuvre

[GingerbreadPudding]

Ragwort - I line manage about ten people and I always get them something because they started buying me gifts and I reciprocated. The other gifts are for the new teachers to thank them for a successful first term, as I'm their mentor, and the office staff. We have a very large school. I'm not expecting return presents at all but I always say thank you when I'm lucky enough to be thought of at Christmas.

[BackforGood]

There you go

I always get them something because they started buying me gifts and I reciprocated

That's how it causes awkwardness in the workplace - you are now having to spend time and money finding and wrapping gifts for several people simply because they got you one first.

[rainyevening]

Gingerbread, I'm sorry, but if I was in your team and picking up your work I would feel that there was something slightly odd about you being able to buy/make 20 (!) presents while off sick. I know you won't have meant it to come across this way but I'd slightly have felt that you were flaunting your leisure. (I know I know that's not what you were doing. But people just get very, very tired in the run up to Christmas)