To find films like "Cheaper By The Dozen" stressful to watch?

[SilenceOfTheSAHMs]

In our house this Christmas we have been watching lots and lots of kids films, the vast majority Tim Burtons ones have been fabulous, but I find films like Cheaper By The Dozen and similar very difficult to watch, lots of chaotic scenes, messy houses, stressed parents, barking dogs etc.

Am I being unreasonable in thinking this? Can anyone suggest any films that make them feel similar?

Or am I dreadfully sensitive?

thanks for the heads up Herrena.

We have been ok today - Horton heard a who and Who framed Roger Rabbit.

My point is Bogeyface, it's not how you feel as the parent of a large family, it's how the children feel. You don't see a problem, I'm sure my parents didn't either. My parents were loving, inclusive and committed. I still wouldn't advocate having a large family and I still feel stressed and slightly panicky seeing films like Cheaper by the Dozen. I wouldn't be without (most of) my siblings. Doesn't mean my life wouldn't have been easier with slightly fewer of us.

A lot of the stress in CBTD was due to the father ignoring the arrangements put in place by the mother. I can't be doing with deliberately making life more stressful than it needs to be and so I can't see the fun in films which deliberately evoke the stress of such situations.

Cheaper by the dozen 1 (or is it 2?) annoyed me because the (anti-feminist) plot seemed to go like this -

• couple have lots of kids. Dad works, mum is a SAHM
• they move to a new town
• dad has to look after his very own offspring for 2 weeks while mum gets opportunity of a lifetime career move
• kids have strops about moving, the basis of which is nothing more than "we dont want to do a, b & c"
• dad does a shit job of looking after offspring. He can't cope and calls mum back
• mum realises her place is in the home and returns after about 5 minutes
• dad gets his way. Kids get their way. Mum is happy to be just a mum and is the only one with magical powers to keep several people alive every day.
• dad gets a shitter job, they move to a shitter house and mums book deal goes bang

So on that basis cheaper by the dozen was shite.

But I know what you mean about loud noise and chaos. I suggest never venturing towards 'Dreamgirls' - 2.5 hours of mediocre singers SCREAMING their way through life. It's horrendous!

And DH gets irrationally annoyed in actions movies where the good guys are finding their way out of a bad situation and they take out a few bad guys but leave the bad guys' weapons behind. TBF he has a point, if your escaping your own kidnapping for example and there's a loaded gun going spare, and you choose not to take it, you're a bit stupid!

Its been years since I saw it so I dont really remember much about the plot, just the noise and the chaos. From my pov, noise and chaos is normal so that sort of thing doesnt bother me in films.

But what has been pointed out about the plot has fucked me off, I dont remember that at all, but then as I say, it was years ago that I saw it and I only watched it once. If it is about a man who is being deliberately useless in order to sabotage his wifes career then I would say it has nothing to do with how many kids he has, he would have done that if he had 1 child or 21.

WhatdoIknow

I think family size is something that parents can never get right. Everyone I know who were onlies or perhaps had 1 sibling say that they would have loved to have been part of a large family. Lots of parents say that they would love a larger family but cant afford it. Yet many, like you, who have been part of a more than 2.4 family hated it. Its so personal because we can only base how we feel on our own experience, you dont know how you would have felt only having one sibling, perhaps you would have been lonely, perhaps you would have loved it. I have tried to balance it as best I can by having a large family but spacing it out more than many would. There are 21 years between my eldest and my youngest, with an average age gap of 4 years. Would have been a bigger average and 5 children but I had a happy accident with DS2 who was born a year after DD3!

On larger families as middle one of fairly spread out five, was always ignored/ forgotten. I think different personalities will always occur so if u r relatively quiet you'll be ignored to some extent in big family. remember one Christmas eve where there was mild panic as it was realised there was no Xmas present for me!!

having said that as adult it's great having 4 siblings.

I find the film stressful. I'm the oldest of 5 - mum worked ft, B1 was very ill for a few years, b2 was very unhappy so I was left to get on with things (both my own stuff and picking up some wider family things). It was clear that mum didn't have enough mental space for all of us and dad was capable of keeping everyone alive but that was about it.

I have 2 children and find the thoughts if more very stressful!

remember one Christmas eve where there was mild panic as it was realised there was no Xmas present for me!!

Thats awful :(

I spend a lot of my mental and emotional energy making sure that each of mine is treated as an individual, and catering to those individual needs. DD2 and 3 for example both need time to talk through things as they are both quite sensitive to others in a way that isnt always obvious, they have a tendency to internalise things if I am not careful and make time for them. DS tends to wear his heart on his sleeve so if he is hurt or angry then he will say so and gets over it pretty quickly, but he wants one to one time with things like Lego and homework, because he likes me to see what he can do. Xmas shopping is interminable but its worth it to make sure each of them gets what they want and that surprises suit each child rather than a "one size fits all" attitude.

I cant imagine forgetting about any of them in any situation, the thought of that is quite upsetting, I really feel for you saoirse :(

OOh just come back to this, what a response! Dcs watching the Grinch now, its bloody awful. Chaotic and ugly.

Is it time to go back to work yet?

I get this! Big time. So stressful. Things like honey I shrunk the kids. Bollocks to films like this.