Hello,
I have my sister visiting me over New Year.
She lives in Australia and loves it there, I'm always pleased for her and love the fact that she enjoys every aspect of the country and her life. Not seen her in 4yrs.
I also have a good life here in England, I am self-employed, I work a lot of hours.. 9-5pm in my office doing orders, and then I work in the evening on my laptop designing new products, I'm on the sofa with my partner and so we still chat and watch things together, he works early and usually falls asleep after dinner anyhow.. it's only me that works for my business and so I have to do everything. I got a new machine this year and I'm working very hard to make the most of it. It's been very successful so far and I really want to get the hard work done now to prepare for when I have children.
I live with my boyfriend, he has no problems with my work, or the hours I do and is very positive towards it and congratulates me for being such a hard worker.
Whenever me and my boyfriend have problems, she always says to "move to Oz", it's great etc etc..
Anyhow, that's the back story.
My issue is, she's already started harping on... "God, get a life and put the computer down".. "take some time off".. "if you weren't so obsessed you would have a life".. "There's more to life than work".. "you need to get out more"..
It makes me so mad that she's so negative, she has a good career as a nurse, so it isn't jealousy.. She constantly makes out that I have no life. I have a great life, I've done lots of things with my life before now and I'm happy, I have plans for the future, but for now our plans (mine & partners) are to save for a house deposit and buy a house in the next 18 months so we can start a family. This year we had a week's holiday, seen 3 big name comedian shows, been 2 to rock gigs, went to see 3 American football matches in London with a long weekend stay. Booked lots of similar things for next year too.. Her idea of a holiday is to lay on a beach for a week, not my thing, I'd be bored in half an hour.
My sister is long-term single, lost a lot of weight in the last few years and is supposedly happy! but she can't seem to help but to make digs at me? Is it because I have a partner? We've been together nearly 6 yrs.
What can I say back? I'm usually good with words but I feel so hurt and upset when she says it, like I'm being bullied in some way, I feel embarrassed almost and talking back or being defensive gets an "oooh I'm only saying" childish voice response that makes me even more annoyed.
How can I deal with it? She's got nothing to be jealous of, we just have very different lives, but I can't help but think that must be her reason. She's also very loud and extrovert but with few hobbies, and I'm fairly quiet day-to-day but have had lots of exciting hobbies in the past, so I'm no shrinking violet by any means..
Sorry for the essay, just didn't want to drip feed.
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How to deal with negative comments..
12 replies
roland83 · 26/12/2014 13:12
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