To be upset about this?

[D0oinMeCleanin]

I wanted our first Christmas to be better than any Christmas we've ever had.

I've worked my arse off since we've left ex to save for xmas and make sure the kids get everything they've asked for (I know this is stupid and that Christmas is not about the gifts)

I bought the best decorations we could afford (which tbh, wasn't much. We had to start to from scratch) My dad made us some stuff and let the kids paint and glitter it. I was really pleased with it all. It looked better than our house evr had since EX hated paying for decorations.

Then Ex put a video of his house on FB (which has been fully redecorated and refurnished with only the best curtosey of ex-sil) She's also bought him numerous all singing, all dancing x-mas decorations and a tree that makes ours look like a stick we've picked up from the park.

There's no way we could have afforded all of that and gifts and food for all the pets the kid's have collected since we've left.

I am (ridiculously, I know) upset about this. Why is it fair that he gets to keep all the furniture (which he then binned anyway) and not pay maintenance, leaving us skint, having to have paid for all new furniture and then get to have everything bought for him to make his house far more magical this Christmas than mine?

Your dd1 has the true measure of him. Clever girl

A "humorous comment" at the expense of DD's mother, and in front of DD since she is on FB, though, Worra.

I have told her to stop Worra. She knows if she posts anything else she'll lose her precious phone for the night. I'm keeping a close eye on FB and her Instagram account for the next wee while.

It wasn't humorous. As paranoid as this sounds it was quite probably planned via inbox to get a reaction from me. One or the other of these "adults" were always leaving thinly veiled insults on my timeline until I hid it from them and Ex despises the kitten. He went so far as to report me to child services for having "a concerning amount of animals near the children" after we got it.

Child services were promptly told to fuck off by me, but I did allow the school liaison officer to visit who reported to Child Services that she was more than satisfied with the home conditions and the conditions in which the pets are kept in. She was less than satisfied with the maintenance I haven't been getting and is putting me in touch with people who can help me sort that.

Exactly Charlotte it was a dig at op in public.

That's good dooin he should be paying for his kids!

Oh, Dooin! I've not been on Mumsnet much this year, and didn't know that you'd got shot of him. Have often read your threads and hoped you'd get away and am DELIGHTED that you have.

Your DD1 is fab, and she's quite right to protect and defend you and your 'inferior' tree (although better to keep the peace and suspend her FB posting privileges for now).

Unfriend those who he's using to get back at you. They aren't your friends. And ignore him.

Agree with MmeLindor. Some bugger was snooping on my facebook when I got shot of my waste of space and relaying the slightest thing back to him. I had a fair idea who it was so I defriended and blocked.

D0oin, I'd say only contact him via official sources regarding maintenance. Use texts to arrange contact. And cut anyone out who is behaving like a shit.

Why on earth would you tell child services to fuck off? It's not their fault someone made a report.
You seem really conflicted about your ex - isn't this the one you were thinking of housing after an accident? Just don't have him on FB and dissuade the kids from picking sides.

Obviously I didn't use the actual words "fuck off" it was someone from the preventions team who phoned, they rang the same day ex had been up at the school to talk about dd1 and the bullying, so it's fairly clear who was behind it.

They told me some concerns had been raised to the school re home conditions and the amount of pets we had and they wanted to offer support before it became a child protection issue. I told them firmly but politely that they were talking bollocks and no such support was needed. They asked if they could visit to check I told them that they'd be wasting their time and mine but did say that the woman from the school who reported the concerns to them was welcome to call round if she wished. She did. Everything was fine. That was the end of that.

He sounds like a spiteful dick. Bet you are glad that you're well rid!