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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To worry about an "Arbonne" friend?

59 replies

phlebasconsidered · 14/12/2014 19:57

A good friend has started to sell this. She is in the beauty trade anyway, and so says this is complimentary, but aibu to worry? I am the sort of person who only ever does make up and hair for work, i'm a quite happy Lidly moisturiser buyer and so on. I worry that since i've seen her and since she's been doing it, we are not the "same", she seems to be selling. I wonder what the facts are about this sort of MLM selling and I would like experiences, if possible.

I love my friend, but she is vulnerable; she has low self esteem and if the right sellers got to her she would believe them. I worry this is what has happened. My last meeting with her, which would normally have been a few glasses of wine and a chat and the kids playing, was more like a sales pitch.

Are Arbonne weird? And if so, what can I do? She's already been to London for a meeting and a big thing about a Mercedes.

I suppose I am saying, once a friend has gone that route, can I help? Should I? I love her, but i'm not getting anywhere.

OP posts:

bumpthedoor · 14/12/2014 21:18

There will always be gullible people in the world, and there will always be someone willing to exploit them. Sad fact.

itsbetterthanabox · 14/12/2014 21:18

When you say arbonne actually works. What do you mean? It washes and moisturises. Like a lot if products.. Obviously clarins etc are more expensive, they are luxury brands! Why would you compare luxury brands to catalogue stuff?

itsbetterthanabox · 14/12/2014 21:20

Is herbalife the same sorta thing? I can't work out what it is!

catslave · 14/12/2014 21:22

It is a makeup and beauty range. I know someone who sells this - the eyeliners are excellent, but she is just a little too 'sell-y' for me to believe it is some sort of holy miracle. Plus the face creams are crap and made my skin flake, so it's not all good. Approach it like any other makeup line.

divingoffthebalcony · 14/12/2014 21:23

I think it's a mixture of gullibility and greed. I've heard of people convinced that they're going to be millionaires in a matter of years. It's scary really, that people can be sucked in so easily.

ovaltine · 14/12/2014 21:33

No, I just use the products, not sure what you mean by "vested interest"?

And by "it works" I mean that it has actually improved my skin and not made various skin conditions worse. Unlike the other supposed "luxury" brands (which I previously used).

Herbalife are meal replacement drinks/nutrition line. They also do skincare now and they are another network marketing/direct selling company (same as forever living/younique/Avon).

Original poster

phlebasconsidered · 14/12/2014 21:35

Oh poo, i'm worried now. She is a nice person, but she is susceptible. Lacks confidence and so on. and I had warning lights going when she was talking to me about how she was confident selling their product. Poop. I can't stop her, it's done. She's already talking about the other women in the team like they are friends, they've had her round, it's all friendly and supportive, they do really well, big house etc. Is it a lot of money they ask for up front? I suppose I'm wondering how best to support her, given that i will never buy anything and it WILL go tits up eventually?

It's really hard. She's my friend, she wants to work and do well, but she's been suckered. I am cross because she could do fine without this shit.

OP posts:

pinkr · 14/12/2014 21:45

I can almost guarantee that any big house is a really of anything other than arbonne such as husbands job,inheritance, rented etc.
The whole thing is about dressing up mediocre people and products into shiny shit.

honeysucklejasmine · 14/12/2014 21:47

Ovaltine, how come you've been to a meeting, if all it is to you is a successful product? I don't go to meetings at any of the pharmaceutical companies which make successful treatments for me.

Summerisle1 · 14/12/2014 21:51

It does make me laugh when people call all these things a cult just because you perhaps don't understand them.

I think you'll find that some of us understand them only too well. Which is why we express the views we do. And of course, the ability to express these opinions is helped no end by the fact that we aren't brainwashed by these cult-like organisations.

thenightsky · 14/12/2014 21:55

I lost a good friend to Amway, which is the same sort of shite.

NoelleHawthorne · 14/12/2014 21:56

WHY would it be four times the price?

many successful companies ( eg chanel) manage to sell in real life shops

Original poster

phlebasconsidered · 14/12/2014 21:56

Poop, how can I help her? She is SO believing it is all the answer. They must be like the Moonies of beauty. I have to away to iron and bed and work at 6, but I will return for advice.

Is it even worth my saying anything, or should I just retreat and help pick up the pieces after, if she is even my friend then?

OP posts:

thenightsky · 14/12/2014 21:58

Don't buy any of her shite.

Be prepared to be dropped as a friend because you don't get it.

thenightsky · 14/12/2014 21:59

Oh... and get ready to be presented with weird shite for xmas and birthdays so she can show she is moving products.

Original poster

phlebasconsidered · 14/12/2014 22:03

Oh poo. I do hope it doesn't come to that. She is a nice person and the whole family like each other. That's why it's worrying me.

I would never buy anything anyway. i am 43 and have only ever used products that have been given to me at Xmas and birthdays, and aside from that, just soap and water. Weirdly, i look alright. At least, I think I do.

OP posts:

ovaltine · 14/12/2014 22:05

I've been to a couple to support my 2 friends who are reps. Because I'm nice like that.

wannabestressfree · 14/12/2014 22:07

Yes I often trot along to 'work' with my friends to support them

ovaltine · 14/12/2014 22:11

It's nice your so supportive to your friends too. I bet we'd get on great in RL :)

clucky80 · 14/12/2014 22:13

I know someone who sells this and she told me that I should use the Arbonne low SPF cream and not the factor 50 SPF that I had been prescribed by a dermatologist due to me being on high dose immunosuppressants due to my double organ transplant. The immunosuppressants put you at a much higher risk of skin cancer and I have to wear factor 50 year round. She told me that it was a conspiracy and that I didn't need that high an SPF! Also I buy the high end products like Clarins etc and I was shocked at the price of Arbonne, it's expensive!

Summerisle1 · 14/12/2014 22:18

should I just retreat and help pick up the pieces after, if she is even my friend then?

Sadly, this is almost certainly what you need to be prepared to do. All these organisations train their acolytes associates in techniques designed to dispel dissenting opinions. Because the "uninformed" are the unfortunate ones who haven't yet seen the light.

I lost a very good friend to Amway. She knew she was the lucky one to have been given this great opportunity. She wanted to share it with all of us. If only we'd been prepared to open our minds we, too, could have joined the cult party.

It took a drastic series of outside factors that distanced her from Amway. Not anything that her many friends said.

DoubleValiumLattePlease · 14/12/2014 22:20

ovaltine - let's put to one side your very obvious vested interest in this stuff for a moment - but I'd really like to know why you think it's not a pyramid scheme or MLM or any other kind of scam? Because, you see, it IS pyramid/MLM. It just is and everyone else here seems to know that!

Greencurtain · 14/12/2014 22:25

The White of the Mercedes is to signify purity or some shit. One of my friends sucked us into a meeting to talk about her "new business".

Apparently the products are decent but it's like £14 for a bottle of shampoo or something. I was going to buy one thing to help my friend out but not at those prices!

I mean anyone can do it - what sort of a company allows absolutely anyone to "work for them" with no interview or anything?

I think you have to pay about £1000-£2000 upfront to get your "samples" which you hand out to your friends in the hope of getting them to buy your stuff.

Marketing directly at your friends and asking them to buy stuff so you can take a cut is unacceptable. It's like saying I need money, give me some of yours. Also all the people up the pyramid from you get a cut - the person who recruited you, the person who recruited them etc. So rather than selling products, it's better for the person to recruit a lot of sellers underneath them so they get a cut of what their recruitees sell. So the people high up the pyramid get rich and get the white merc whilst mugs down the pyramid sell products and lose all their friends in the process.

For my friend, I didn't know whether to keep my distance from her or feel sorry for her. As I didn't know her well, I stepped back.

MLMs are immoral and prey on people who are not that savvy IMO.

Nothavingfunrightnow · 14/12/2014 22:33

What does "MLM" stand for?

Greencurtain · 14/12/2014 22:39

Multi layer/level marketing I think

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