AIBU to be rude to cold callers?

[Yambabe]

Seen a few topics on the subject of people being telephoned for various scams, selling purposes etc recently, and I am amazed at how many people engage with the caller. I assume this is mostly because of good old good manners?

My phone is registered with the TPS but I still get cold calls (I think the foreign ones aren't subject to the regulations and some UK companies know that they can be hard to trace so just don't care) so to me they are fair game. I am perfectly happy to cut them off, speak sharply to them (although I never swear) or sometimes if I'm bored string them along for a bit for comedy value.

DH is even worse than me.

My Dsis works in a call centre (although it's for one of the big energy providers so she doesn't cold-call) and says I should have some sympathy for the people making the calls, they are just trying to make a living. I kind of get this but my perspective is I have opted out of having to deal with them and if they persist in still calling me despite this they certainly don't deserve my respect or any more of my time than I care to allow them.

AIBU to not care about the person, just get rid of the call?

I'm polite to all of them except the ones who try to tell me my PC has malware. I'm very rude to them, because they're actually scammers and liars who are trying to con me, so the gloves are off.

Well, Bogey, if you'll give me their names and contact details, I'll be only too happy to do so. Can you do that? If so, I, and so many others will be SO grateful... I genuinely, honestly mean that. But the trouble is that these criminals - yes, they are that - deliberately hide their identities.

In my opinion, what we need is a concerted international effort to track them down. Blaming their victims is not the answer.

Of couse I am sorry for the poor people who get sucked into working for exploitative comanies like these. But why should ANY people's lives be put at risk to help business owners who exploit their own operatives?

You are talking about scammers though. I am talking about legitimate companies using the fact that calls originating outside the UK do not have to conform to TPS rules. Its not illegal for them to do that. Immoral yes, but not illegal.

And I would suggest that saying lives are put at risk is rather OTT.

Bogey, I - and many others - CHOOSE not to have our phones invaded by illegal - or immoral - crap. We take all the legal precautions available to us. That is surely our right? (How would you feel if a similar sort of invasive rubbish interrupted either your quiet time at home or the time when you really, really need to concentrate, at work? Please tell me - I'd really like to know how you cope.) A friend of mine over 80 with two replacement knees and therefore considerably less mobile than some was bothered by junk calls SIX times the other day; they are registered with the TPS.

The regulatory authorities in the UK seem unable or unwilling to allow peoples' choice to be undisturbed. I feel that this is wrong. I also feel that - as I have said - that their unwillingness to take action can put lives at risk. My Mother has already fallen over, become unconscious and been taken by ambulance to hospital. The next time could be fatal. The 'next time' could well be caused by hurrying to answer the phone. I know of several other older ladies to which the same worries apply.

It would be unreasonable to be RUDE.

They are doing a job, and in the current climate there's not always a lot of choice in what job to do.

It's not unreasonable to just say "no thank you" and hang up.

There's no obligation on you at all to continue the conversation.

BUT, Trills, the calls can either - as I have said - put dangerous stress on fragile older people - there are MILLIONS such - who feel they really must rush to answer the phone or (in my case) be an unwanted intrusion into my private or working life. I work at home. An interrruption can be very annoying. That sounds precious but it is true.

If people welcome such calls, then good luck to them.

All I am asking is to be left in peace. It is my right, in UK law, to ask for this. If people deliberately take steps to circumvent the law, then I feel 100% justified to complain. I am not rude to callers, either, and I certainly don't swear at them. But I do tell them how I feel - and I am perfectly justfied in doing so.

The analogy is, I think, with charity chuggers. I already give to about 10 good causes every month by standing order, and using gift aid - the most efficient method. I don't want to be bothered by people trying to re-recruit me to charities I have already signed up for, or else badgering me to give to causes that I might not support or don't have any spare cash to offer to.

fuckwitteryhasform: Sorry I didn't word my reply very well, was pretty tired. Basically if you say 'remove me from your list' then hang up they won't do it usually as you have to speak to a supervisor and confirm you wish to completely have your details removed from the database.

It is my right, in UK law, to ask for this.

HEAD - DESK!

Yes it is, but that law only extends to calls originating in the UK because calls that originate outside of the UK cannot be controlled! What part of that are you not getting?! The UK government/telecom companies cannot do anything about the law in other countries, all they can do is ask that our laws be respected but there is no come back if that doesnt happen.

You go on about fraud, lives at risk, etc I think you are being very OTT about it. Yes people could have falls when rushing to the phone to answer a scam call, but that could equally be levelled at a wrong number! The person answering the phone makes the judgement call as to its urgency, I dont see how you can suggest that a person falling and hurting themselves is the fault of the person calling!

Registering with TPS is a good start, and it works. And yes, you are well within your rights to complain to which ever company rings you but the fact is that they dont care, they wont listen and sometimes you have to accept that there is nothing you can do about it.

It is perfectly legal.

It drives me MAD! Im ok at first and ask them to remove me from their list but when persistent (practically daily) I am very rude to them indeed, oh yes I am and hope they are quaking in their shoes by the time ive finished.

Right.....

I used to work in Direct Marketing. Not on the phones or even vaguely connected to the area that contacted the public, but it means I know how it works.

In the UK list managers/owners clean their lists regularly to remove all TPS registered numbers. They do this because their clients face hefty fines if they contact people who are registered and that is not good for the company who supplied a "dirty" list, word soon gets round. However, depending on how often they perform the clean, and how often the clients who have bought the list update it, it can be up to 6 months before the calls stop. The TPS warn you of this.

In the rest of the world.......all bets are off. Thats it.

In fact its so out of control that i dont answer my home phone anymore. If people work for these companies then i have no sympathy whatsover with them, none at all.

I'm rude to people who cold call. I don't give a shit how unreasonable it is, if you call my house and don't take no for an answer then I will tell you to kindly go fuck yourself.

If people work for these companies then i have no sympathy whatsover with them, none at all.

Why?

Genuine question.

In India they are well paid and sought after jobs. In the UK they are the exact opposite but if its that or struggling on benefits to feed your kids, wouldnt you do it?

My son got his first job at 21. He is qualified and able to work but a) there is very high unemployment here and b) he is disabled and we know he was discriminated against with other jobs because of this (good luck proving it!). He ended up cold calling for a window company, it was a shit job with a shit company who ended up fucking him over but he was so grateful to have a job, any job, that he worked really hard and was so happy to have it. He is now doing very well, no thanks to that job, but choices are something that not everyone has.

YANBU.

We used to get these sort of calls at the same time every evening so I would get DD to answer the phone and say whatever she liked to get rid if them. Her favourite ploy was to say her mother couldn't come to the phone as she had fallen down drunk. (I hadn't. I was usually just cooking the dinner)

Lately though we don't even get a person on the other end; it is always those automated messages. Every day, sometimes more than once. Usually it will be one of solar panels, PPI or a gas supplier. I just put the phone down and swear to myself.

I'd like to see you all down the Job Centre explaining that you won't take Job X because Company X does cold-calling and it's immoral.

Bogey is quite right; I've worked in telco regulation (not in the UK) and it's frustrating, but most companies cold-calling for legitimate (though annoying) purpose are absolutely not doing anything wrong; scammers are a different matter and of course can't be regulated.

I just don't have a landline, haven't had for years and I never will again. Obviously I realise that's not the solution for everyone though.

Being pissed off with scammers gives you the right to be racist does it? Well you learn something new everyday……

Don't be so precious Bogey. The woman was a crook who should be jail for trying to defraud innocent people. I was pointing out that to be a successful crook it was not a smart move as someone from the sub continent with a heavy accent and poor English to call herself Jennifer. If you are going to a crook at least be a competent one rather than insulting the intelligence of your potential victims. Though I suppose it is a good thing as no one is likely to fall for such blatant fraud. If that is racist so be it.

I agree with Flora - and I too have an elderly mother. When still at home, DM was giving out her details to those horrible phone scammers because she is elderly and believed them (she has now been diagnosed with dementia)

Anyone who takes a job where they are deliberately trying to con people over the telephone is scum - I'm talking specifically about the computer virus calls and the accident claim calls. Yes, I know they are totally fake and deal with them, but there are elderly and vulnerable people out there who are genuinely taken in. My DM wouldn't know she hadn't been in an accident, for example - she'd believe the guy and would probably have given over her bank card details.

So I have no time for these crooks and I tell them so.

If you want to make sure your number is removed from these places, your best bet is to state 'I would like to have my number removed from your list'. Any decently run company would take that seriously and normally you would be transferred to a supervisor so they can make sure they have your details right and confirm that you wish to be taken off the company system.

I would charge £100 for the amount of my time that would take. Though given a choice, I would much rather not have the call in the first place than have the £100. Do you think the majority of cold calling companies (who are calling from India) would pay me £100 for my help in removing my name from their database?

Also, if a company were "decent", then surely they wouldn't call someone on the TPS database, even if calling from abroad?

I regard cold calls as a form of assault, and treat the callers accordingly. I don't care if people need the jobs. They should find a more respectable way to earn a living. Begging for example. At least beggars aren't accosting me in my home.

that is interesting, Bogey.
I've been registered with the TPS for over a decade.
5 years ago I reverted to my maiden name.
I still get cold calls from UK-based companies asking for "Mrs X".

So IME experience these lists are incredibly out of date and there doesn't seem to be any sort updating done by companies.

The good thing is that I can recognise the call is going to be a waste of my time very quickly the instant the caller asks for "Mrs X".

I used to be polite. Then I got one, when I was waiting for a call back from the GP; I had starting bleeding/was miscarrying at 14 weeks; was scared/in pain/sad etcetc. I tried to explain to the woman that I couldn't speak to her as I was waiting for an important call. She was really insistent, said it wouldn't take long and launched into her speil. I snapped at her, and she told me off for being rude!!

I am still polite, but just say I haven't got time and hang up.

Theoretician: My comment was based on the place I worked. They were meticulous when it comes to TPS. Mori is known for their research and don't risk their reputation by calling people TPS. However, in the UK it is illegal for a company to contact you if you have stated you wish to be removed from their list. What some people don't seem to realise is this needs to be done properly. Not just someone saying 'don't call me again' and then hanging up.

YABVU. Sorry. I totally get it -- everyone hates cold calls for very good reasons.

I cold-called earlier this fall to help with a state election (US). Despite the fact that the computerized list we were working from was supposed to include only people who had not opted out, I called a fair few people who had opted out and should not have been on the list. I really, really appreciated it when they were nice to me about the mistake. Because it was not my mistake. I had no control over what numbers I called and no way to tell anything about those numbers.

Similarly, cold callers also have no control and no way to tell. And they have to make these calls to earn their wages. And it's a terrible job. (I thought it was fucking miserable making those calls over and over, even for a good cause.) So I do think YABVU and unkind to be so rude.

If you're pissed off at the company for calling you, which is not U at all, then ask to speak to a manager and tell him/her you are reporting their company for breaking the law.

you have no idea what it's like in the UK, as you are in the United States, it's an intrusion

OP yanbu

Do cold calls work in radically different ways in the UK?

I think y'all get more than we do, so you're probably that much more frustrated.

But at the other end of the line it's still a person with a shitty job. Unless it's a scammer, I don't know why you'd be rude to someone who has to make these calls in order to eat, no matter where you live.

I still think you should speak however you like to them.

It's your phone, which you pay for and they're calling your home.

And they never apologise for the intrusion.