to think it is just fine if my son walks home from school with other DC?

[CheerfulYank]

We live in a small town. Our house is two and a half blocks from the school. DS is seven and a half. (We're American so he is in first grade, his second year of "real" school.)

I don't drive and am a PT childminder. The first few months of school I took my mindees (two young toddlers, one my own DD, and two five year olds) and walked to pick DS up every day.

Now we've got snow on the ground so I can't push the double stroller, plus it can get down to -20 and below so not weather I'd want to bring the little ones out in.

I decided to ask a local mother whose kids walk past ours every day if DS could walk with them. Her kids are 7, 9, and 11. The nine year old (the only girl) is particularly cautious and responsible so I'm completely comfortable with this. (I'm not worried about DS being kidnapped or anything, just that he wouldn't look for cars well enough). Local mother said sure and that if it got really cold she'd pick them up.

All going well. The issue is my mother. She seems to think that this is a major "devil may care" attitude on my part and questions me about it all the time, if DS is still doing it, if I worry, if it's all working out etc.

She's actually got me paranoid that there's something wrong with this! Surely a seven year old can walk home for TWO blocks in the company of some older sensible children, or AIBU?

Tell your mum to look at www.freerangekids.com/ I don't see a problem with your son walking with the other kids.

My DS1 has been walking to/from school by himself since age 7.

He is more than OK. He constantly surprises me with how capable he is.

Is good for them IMO.

We are in a busy suburb with one road to cross unsupervised.

"just that he wouldn't look for cars well enough"

This part is the part that would prevent my child from doing it.
If he isn't yet able to consistently look for cars then he needs an adult to walk him home.
It isn't fair for a 9y and an 11y to be responsible for him. They are not old enough to be held responsible for his well being.

When he is able to walk home AND look out for traffic consistently, then he is old enough and mature enough to walk home alone/with friends.

Well, the 11 year old is responsible for the well being of at least twenty children as part of the school patrol. And the nine year old loves it. But that may be my mother's issue, Hula.

Cheerful, I don't see the problem with older children taking responsibility for younger ones. To me I just see that as being how it is. In larger families it's the norm. Even for me with just 2 children I often say to DS to keep an eye on his little sister. I think children do that naturally anyway.

Another thing, ime, is that children will defer to an adult if they can as that's what they're used to eg, crossing the road. But when they have to think for themselves they can do it.

Children are much more capable than they are often given credit for.

It's okay I guess but only so long as you don't rely on them to always be there or the mum to always do all the pickups on sub-zero days.

It's the fact that in the op it says the child can't reliably be trusted to look on the roads.

If anything was to happen as a result of this, who would be held responsible?

The son
The 9yo
The 11yo

I don't think the distance or being accompanied is what counts, what counts is that he is safe.

When I first moved to where I am now the lady next door's grand children would walk to her on their own, they were 5 and 3, but, but but, they live across the 'T' junction at the top of my street. I live on a cul-de-sac.

So mum would ring gran, mum and gran would go to their respective front doors and wave to each other, mum would take the girls across the road and from then on they did the journey 'on their own' feeling all grown up and responsible, holding hands and in view of two adults at all times.

In other words safe.

How many roads do they have to cross? Is there a crossing patrol? Is he safe?