To want to know how to manage DS's desire to perform?

[SolidGoldBrass]

He's 10 now and generally lovely. And I know that I was similar as a kid and still am really - he wants to Be A Star and loves an audience. He belongs to a choir group at school and he goes to a weekly drama class, so it's not like we are crushing his aspirations.
But he wants to perform all the time. Whenever I take him to a social gathering he wants to sing or dance and be watched and applauded. What I need is a tactful way of getting it across to him that not every event is about him and not every adult is going to indulgently watch someone else's kid hopping about. (He can sing quite nicely but his dancing is, well, like any 10 year old without either freakish talent or years of training).
Has anyone else got a kid like this? How do you strike the balance between not hurting your PFB's feelings and not driving all your acquaintances mad?

Usedtobe Goth Morris Dancing I love it! Goes off to google.

This thread has made me .

I don't have one like this but my cousin just loved to show off his tap dancing at every available opportunity, even when out shopping or at the bingo with our grandma .

He's a very successful television producer now so there's hope for all your little performers.

Can't he join your side?

Oh Sanity Morris Minors?

OP We're in East Anglia, Dark Sides are bit bit more thin on the ground out here - probably why they get so many gigs!

Badger It's definitely A Thing! Back to the pagan roots and all that!

Nobody likes a show off.

At least, that's what my parents told me. It's kind of channelling Austen, no?

Showing your age, Usedtobe.

But NickyFury's cousin (and people like him) is the reason I can't go along with the "shut him up for his own sake" brigade.

Let him perform. But let him realise there's more to performing than just getting up there. You owe it to yourself and your audience to give the best performance you can.

I think her version was a bit kinder ... It's not entirely true, either - a talented show off in the right place is great! Life would be a bit drab without singers, actors, dancers, musicians etc ...

It's all about time and place though, what's fine at an open-mic ( however you spell it! ) is much less fine in a bus queue so I think the OP ( and me ) need to reinforce that with our kids ...

SGB lots of pubs do get-up-and-have-a-go nights - might be worth a try - we went to one with my sister at her local, it was brilliant! All ages from 12 to 80, loads of different instruments and singers, all jamming along to folk songs or taking it in turns to do a solo spot ... Perhaps ask in your local music shop if there's a similar thing near you? It would help to get home the message that there's a right and wrong place to strut your stuff ...

SGB but you are performing because your troupe have been asked to do so. You don't just start dancing on a Saturday in the market because you feel like doing so when you walk past the veg stall.

He needs to get the "only performing when specifically asked to do so" thing, which is isn't getting yet.

"Let him perform. But let him realise there's more to performing than just getting up there."

Yep. Like being asked to! And not doing it if you're not.

Honestly, he's 10, not 4.

Which is why I suggested giving formal opportunities to perform like plays, concerts, festivals and joining a Morris side.

^^^^

See?

I have considered the kids' morris thing, but there simply isn't one locally.
I like the open mic idea, though - will definitely look into that.

(And yes, I know he's 10 and not a toddler, which is part of the problem, but he is a very young 10 and there may well be some ASD issues going on.)