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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Steiner school

39 replies

captainBeaky · 30/11/2014 18:15

Hello, I'm posting here for traffic and would be grateful for any advice. My friend's DS (a very young 7) is having huge difficulties in mainstream school. He regularly breaks his heart about going, feels that he has no friends (although teachers say otherwise, but they have also said that other children look after him, almost like a pet.) He doesn't cope very well with the demands of school and is very slow in completing his work. He often gets dressed back to front. He is behind significantly academically (not that this bothers her, she is simply concerned about the affect this is having on his confidence)
He has recently been saying that he wants to die and has also said he wishes he was in a different family, even though friend and her partner are brilliant, loving parents.
She is extremely worried about him. He does seem very young for his age,and is often in his own little world. He is possibly somewhere on the autistic spectrum although no formal diagnosis has been made. She desperately wants to take him out of mainstream school but is not in a financial position to home educate.
A new Steiner school has opened about a 45 minute drive from her house. She went to look recently and felt it would be perfect for her son, but he is very unlikely to get a place as she doesn't live within the catchment area. Is there anything she can do? It is heartbreaking to know that he is so unhappy. Please advise if you can.

OP posts:
Shockers · 30/11/2014 19:44

There are fees to pay too. I think financial and practical (painting and decorating etc) help are expected from parents.

I looked round a Steiner school for my DCs when they were little and loved the holistic way of teaching and learning. I was less impressed when they said that they wouldn't consider DD because she has LD and less still when I found out that PE was only ever dance.

Shockers · 30/11/2014 19:45

*also expected

CaptainVasiliBorodin · 01/12/2014 08:32

I went from one extreme to the other. Started off at a Steiner school before going to a traditional public school.

As far as Steiner is concerned, I think the Core philosophy (anthroposophy) is mad as a box of frogs. Although there is a lot about the Steiner system that is easy to mock I think it fairly good in terms of creating a holistic learning environment that very much focuses on developing independent and creative thinking processes, individual responsibility , the understanding of ethical principles and building a sense of social responsibility. It is the execution of that philosophy that tends to vary wildly as Steiner schools (well the one I went to anyway) seemed occasionally guilty of recruiting staff who were employed on the basis that they were ardent believers in the Steiner system rather than them actually being good teachers.

One thing I do remember was that for the most part the kids were very happy. Additionally, Steiner schools do offer much more diversity with regards to the subjects taught compared to mainstream schools. For instance I had classes in geology, astronomy, Greek mythology and architecture . They also excel in languages, introducing French and German at Kindergarten level. The schools are very arts/humanities/crafts orientated which is great if that is the direction you want to head but if you wanted to do hard sciences you were f*cked really. I left as I wanted to be an engineer and there was bugger all chance of that happening if stayed at the school. But it was the quirky stuff I remember, things like moving a lesson outside if it was a warm sunny day, building a footbridge across a river or taking part in the acting and full set production of a play infront of 800 people

On the downside the schools seemed to attract the worst elements of the very vocal batshit crazy ‘alternative’ community, the sort of folk who think television is evil and insist on making their own organic clothes out of home grown hemp. Fine if they kept their views to themselves but more often than not these groups had a very strong influence or the PTA/governors often to the detriment to the wider school community. My dad used to love winding them up. Other negatives to consider was that there were no competitive sports, homeopathic treatments were ‘encouraged’ ,science subjects were not taken too seriously and were at times made a mockery of by members of staff who had a slightly different take on a particular well established peer reviewed and historically robust theory. Mad really.

Anyway, I finished my schooling at a good old fashioned boarding school where I was turned into a rugby playing Tory voting sadistic prefect in no time ;-p

Finally, I recently attended a school reunion with my old Steiner mates and while great to catch up with everyone I sensed an awful lot of bitterness in terms of the schools not really preparing its pupils for life beyond the Steiner system. Quite a few of my former class mates seemed to have gone off the rails a bit before finding direction in their lives.

Well that’s my 0.02$

worldgonecrazy · 01/12/2014 08:46

My daughter goes to the local Steiner school (which incidentally is also good academically and has a good science dept too).

Having said that, the school is very honest that it simply doesn't have the staff or capabilities to offer the support needed to children with severe SN. There are a couple of children there who are mildly autistic but no severe SN.

A lot will depend on the reasons behind your friend's son's behaviour. If it is because he can't cope with large class sizes, noise, other people's disruptive behaviour, or the pressure of having to do well in SATS, then he might be better off in the gentler atmoshere of a Steiner. Otherwise it might be better to avoid disruption and leave him where he is.

(Also a Tory voting rugby follower)

LadyFairfaxSake · 01/12/2014 09:45

DD went to a Steiner school for a year between ages 3 & 4. At that stage she was undiagnosed, but at 9 she was diagnosed with ASD & dyspraxia.
That year was horrible; the teachers were useless as teachers but treated DD terribly, the kids were uncontrolled & bullied her & the parents were cliquey & aggressive.
After a year we took her out of there after a few unpleasant incidents.
It is one of my biggest regrets that we ever sent her there.

Madmum24 · 01/12/2014 09:50

What shocked me most about our local school apart from the fact that several of the teachers seemed to be on mind altering drugs was the presence of religious artefacts in all of the classrooms despite the school being advertised as "non-religious". Every single classroom had a bible and pictures and beeswax models of the Madonna and child, which I found strange and queried. The teacher was shocked and said they were a "christian school, but non denominational" A few of the other things said in their prospectus seemed to be brought out of thin air as well.

CharlesRyder · 01/12/2014 10:16

If it's the Free Steiner school (and therefore LEA) I'm thinking of no EHCP will be forthcoming for relatively mild difficulties, unfortunately.

I agree that the current school's SENCo should be first point of call though.

Phoenixfrights · 01/12/2014 17:14

There is no harm in consulting the senco but it is v worrying if they have not already had involvement. Have they noticed nothing??

There is nothing to be lost requesting a statutory assessment. The charity IPSEA may be able to advise your friend.

CharlesRyder · 01/12/2014 17:17

I meant SENCo would be first point of call if statutory assessment were to be requested. Yes, parents can request it themselves but the SENCo should be experienced at doing it and will be able to gather good evidence of what has already been put in place.

Tapewormuprisings · 01/12/2014 17:19

I have friends that went to a big Steiner school in the south east. He said coke usage was rife, behaviour was a huge problem and he'd never send his own children there! He left about 7 years ago.

I've also heard that they don't have much provision for children with SEN.

Tapewormuprisings · 01/12/2014 17:20

*a friend

escaped · 31/01/2015 14:54

Worth reading if you are considering steiner education
stopsteinerinstroud.com/a-steiner-experience/

Balaboosta · 31/01/2015 16:27

Lots of close family friends educated at Steiner school but my impression is that sens are not well accommodated. It is a well-worn path for middle class parents whose child is struggling in school to slap their kids into a Steiner school without taking time to understand those needs. The Steiner ethos is very rigid and although the spirit is free thinking, there's a very doctrinaire approach - do xyz and child will develop along the lines of abc. Also child new to any school is not in good position for assessment. The commitment to any "new" child can never be the same and they have not got the long View of the child's needs over time. Verdict: I wouldn't do it, under those circumstances. Let us know how she gets on though please.

whatscrackinmypeppers · 27/02/2020 19:20

I would encourage anyone thinking about sending their child to this kind of school to give this a listen.

www.iheart.com/podcast/105-behind-the-bastards-29236323/episode/part-one-rudolf-steiner-the-racist-49618265/

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