To think one bath a week for an 18 year old isn't really enough?

[Crumpetsandbutter]

I don't have teenagers but I was surprised when talking with a friend about her 18 year old daughter, who she was saying got tired as she was up so early and she wished she'd lie in a bit longer.

I said 'oh well I suppose she has to dry her hair and all that' and she said that she only baths once a week on Sundays.

AIBU to think this isn't much? She only 'washes' with a makeup wipe, not even a strip wash with a flannel.

[cardibach]

OP has said the person concerned doesn't smell she obviously feels comfortable or she would behave differently - most people behave in ways that make them feel comfortable. Ergo (needs to go on underused phrases thread) she washes enough.
I am old enough to have grown up with once a week bathing being the expectation and have switched to more frequent. I don't shower daily and nobody (not even very honest DD) has ever said I smell. We are way to scared of dirt/germs as is shown on laundry threads by people feeling the need to wash towels after every shower.

[Chumpster]

If she doesn't smell, then what's the prob? Most people go overboard in how much they wash I reckon. (including me...)

[browneyedgirl86]

Once a week? Yuck. That's gross.

[MrsBigginsPieShop]

Eek. I barely have time for a toothbrush and mascara jab most mornings. I bet I pong :(. Probably two showers a week and a long bath at the weekend...

[Janethegirl]

I tend to shower every other day, but some days I may showers/bath twice a day. It depends on what I am doing.
Give the girl a break, being disabled and not particularly active, she may not need a shower every day.

[SauvignonBlanche]

I'm saddened by the mentality of people piling and saying things like 'that's gross' and 'she must stink'.

Daily showers are a modern phenomonen and whilst pleasant are not strictly necessary. I shower daily in the winter and twice daily when it's warmer but, that's because I enjoy it, I don't need it.

DS is almost 18 and I've never been able to get him to have a daily shower, he has AS and I don't know if that's why he doesn't like it. He now has a bath once a week and he does not smell, I've buried my head in his armpits during the years I spent arguing over his ablutions, from when he hit puberty to when I realised that his weekly bath was acceptable, about a year ago.

It's depressing to realise how many posters are now thinking 'eww' and 'he must stink', he doesn't.

[DustInTheWind]

'It's depressing to realise how many posters are now thinking 'eww' and 'he must stink', he doesn't.'

Which is why we don't discuss all sorts of personal habits outside our home. Because of the opinionated ignorance of others.
My DB learned this back in the 70s when he was exfoliating and using moisturiser and bathing regularly. Which was seen as a sign of extreme homosexuality back then.
If your DS doesn't smell, and doesn't discuss his personal habits, then he'll be safe from 'eww, disgusting..' and the like.
Your friend needs to acquire some discretion when discussing her daughter's personal habits with others, she's not helping with her chattering.

[ExpectTheVeryUnexpected]

I shower or bathe once a week and have a quick wash at the sink other days and I don't stink. In summer I shower more but more to cool me down than anything. I have a friend though who bathes four or five times a week and always smells of body odour and sweat. So you really can never tell!

[Hatespiders]

In answer to one or two questions since my last post:-

I do find my dh's showering habits excessive, but it doesn't worry me in the slightest. He's entitled to do what he likes in the bathroom. He's still thrilled to have access to hot water and a shower whenever he likes, as in Africa, most people take a little plastic pot of water behind a wooden screen and try to pour it over themselves after liberally soaping. He's never got tired of modern plumbing here in UK.

No, he doesn't comment on my bathing habits either. And I'm sure he would say something if I did smell!

As for my 'erm' other bits, no, they don't smell.

I think I agree with one or two posters who have said that the body has different groups of bacteria some of which are 'good' for the skin. My hair doesn't get greasy at all for being washed only every 4 days, but I have a friend who washes hers every morning and it's greasy by the next day.

I'm quite amused at the horror expressed on here that anyone could go around unshowered for a few days. We were perfectly accustomed to weekly bath night for decades and we didn't have deodorants either. Honestly, I can't remember anyone smelling. Perhaps we all ponged to high heaven, but I don't reckon we did!

[SauvignonBlanche]

Very good point DustInTheWind, you're right, it's not something that would normally be discussed.

[YvesJutteau]

"But I've certainly been around people who bathe/shower once a week and claim they are still clean, don't smell, etc. Despite their protestations, it is actually quite noticeable that they bathe infrequently. Of course, that may not be true for everyone."

Well, yes. In this case, for example, where it's not the person who is bathing infrequently who claims that they don't smell -- it's a third party (the OP) who concedes that. So we can probably be fairly confident that the teenager in question genuinely doesn't smell.

[Thebodynowchillingsothere]

I think her mother shouldn't be discussing her daughters personal life with you. That does stink.

[Mammanat222]

I think once a week - regardless of how inactive you are or how many wipes you use - is probably a little too infrequent?

I shower every other day (hair-wash as well) and have a quick wash down of pits and naughty bits the other days.

In summer it's a lot more frequent - daily.

I bath DS 2-3 times a week at the moment unless he is proper filthy. In summer it's a lot more frequent due to him being lathered in sun-cream (and not the fact he smells!)

[badfurday]

Fair enough if she only has a bath once a week. But does she not feel like crap? I'd stink if I didn't shower every morning and feel like shit. I couldn't leave the house without a shower
For me having a shower is part of my waking up process.

[Thebodynowchillingsothere]

Mamm

Loving your pits and naughty bits.

[BlueberryWafer]

Is it just me that, after reading this thread, wants to go for a really nice hot shower?

[Neverbuyheliumbalonz]

Fair enough if she only has a bath once a week. But does she not feel like crap? I'd stink if I didn't shower every morning and feel like shit. I couldn't leave the house without a shower
For me having a shower is part of my waking up process.

'For me' being the operative part of the sentence there.

[BertieBrabinger]

If it really is just once a week then I think that is unhygienic and frankly a bit lazy.

I also don't buy the over washing and germ obsession of modern living excuse. The Greeks and Romans were rather big on the bathing bit if I recall and I should think that modern medicine and public health has been greatly aided by improved personal hygiene.

Each to their own and all that, but some of these excuses for lack of personal hygiene simply don't wash (pun intended) with me.

Moreover, the amount of people who think they don't smell because they have become accustomed to their whiffiness!!!

[bobbyjoe]

I do think with hair especially the more you wash it the more it needs washing. When working in an office I showered and washed hair every morning. If running late and hair couldn't be done then my hair was greasy that day. After I went on maternity leave I left my hair for longer and longer between washes - 2-3 days - and gradually my hair didn't look like it needed washing every day. It just wasn't greasy. I wash it every 3 days now and it doesn't smell either and never gets greasy. When I've been ill and had to leave it, it took a week before it was lank and on the turn for greasiness.

I think it's possible it could be the same with skin. I do believe people when they say they don't smell - they just might not smell of product only a neutral smell but not unpleasant. I now shower every day but haven't used deodorant since found out I was pregnant. I can sniff my armpits and they don't smell. If I were to smell my socks at the end of the day there's no smell unless I've gone jogging or it's summertime. But then I usually wear flipflops.

[Wishtoremainunknown]

I once stayed somewhere for a few weeks with a friend where the shower and bath did not work. Strip washing only except once a week when we d go to the pool to shower there.

I don't think either of us did smell. He (my friend) certainly didn't and he used to go running every morning. I did ask that he would tell me if I did smell and he asked the same of me.

[Wishtoremainunknown]

My eczema cleared up too.

[FrancesNiadova]

Ewwwww, that's gross. I do threaten my 16 y.o. that I will put him in the courtyard & hose him down!

[MiddletonPink]

If she really doesn't smell and doesn't look grubby I'm not sure what the problem is?

Ds is 15 now he has to shower daily because he does start to whiff if not.

[SauvignonBlanche]

Ewwwww, that's gross
How mature

[NoMontagues]

I think it's up to her how often she showers / bathes. As PPs have said, perhaps it's a lot of faff for her, with her disability.

I do feel that picking over the personal hygiene habits of an adult woman who neither volunteered this information to you or participated in the conversation that you've chosen to make public on the internet is a bit off and makes me feel a bit dirty.

Fwiw I shower daily and dcs have a bath every night. I do not feel that I am a victim of any sort of marketing ploy- how much is a bar of soap FFS. I just prefer the feeling of having showered. Personal choice.