do you think im overreacting regarding housing association?

[Tammy1212]

i moved here july ever since upstairs neighbour has been mean.

• locking me out communal door
• saying i cannot use shared garden cos she was there first
• racial comments and knocking on my door to rant
• banging on the floor to upset me

my HA said they will talk to her n offer mediation but i dont want that
they think its "neighbourly" for her to knock on my door wtf! its harrassment if i dont like you
they keep saying we should sort it but i dont ever want to speak to her again im happy ignoring her
she has been horrible to me from day dot
she also steals my letters and listens to my conversations i have on the phone (facts n proven)
shes harassed me and invaded my privacy but they think i should just "get over it"
im such a private person so this annoyed me more then the racist stuff
and they said they need proof of the racism but how exactly does one prove that?

last tenant was black she had an issue with him blaming his mental health issues now me?

i had an issue with a neighbour before in my old flat for a bit, she was white and not once did i accuse her of racism so i have no history if pulling the "race card"

i asked them to move me which they refuse.
i actually wasnt meant to move here. they housed me in my danger area (domestic violence) so im not even meant to be in this borough anyway
management transfers you get ONE choice or you're booted off the list so i had non choice but to accept n i was desperate my car was getting damaged n stufg

like i said it was on at 3am ONCE
its off now and she still does it.
ive turn the volume down 5%
you dont need to keep picking on one example

On your other thread Sun 23-Nov-14 23:54:08 you wrote I have the same volume on my tv always
then at 00:43:24
you wrote IM NOT WATCHING TV well I wasn't because she was banging around I am now again because she stopped.
So you were still watching it at nearly one in the morning.
For all you know her daughter's room is above yours so you may have disturbed her when she needs sleep for school.
So by the sounds of it your watching the tv beyond midnight happens more than you realise.

and when was that posted? today? no i dont think so.
her daughters room is at the front of the house
hers is where mine is at the back.
i will watch tv whenever i want now she wants to continue to p me off by wearing boots after the manager saw her today n my tv is off.
i write this post because i want to move. thats it
i dont give a F about being considerate to her anymore she isnt to me and like i said the tv isnt the issue.
funny you keep picking on that excluding the harrassment.

The TV is an issue!Turn it down and when it's unreasonable hours wear ear phones.

You are to become a mum,it's time to grow up,protect a future home for your child and get some responsibility

Please excuse the typos- autocorrect!

Up-to-date = up
Open =op

You've still not answered my question as to why you have started a new thread about this instead of updating your one that you started on Sunday.
On that one in your OP you put I'm not moving cos I'm not the problem
Now you are saying that you do.
What has changed since then?

Unfortunately for you, walking around your home with shoes on is not considered antisocial behaviour. It's normal behaviour. I understand that it's bothering you but that's the down side of living under someone else. Also it might be worth keeping in mind that she may not even be stomping around. With poor sound insulation the sound can be amplified in your flat. My house is over 3 floors and my DD's room is over mine. When she walks across the floor it sounds like a herd of elephants but I know she is being very careful and quiet.

Mediation sounds like a great idea - it'll give the housing association the opportunity to see who the real problem is.

i have an attitude because i defend myself against rubbish erm ok
anyway i got the answers i wanted.
thanks to helpful answers.

I agree that you need to show willing and agree to mediation even if you think it's 100% her fault. She has no right to bar you from the communal garden for a start. Mediation really is the only way to go.

And if the mediation doesn't work, you can scream and scream and scream until you're sick

"listens to my conversations i have on the phone (facts n proven)"

I can hear all my downstairs neighbours phone conversation because he is such a loud git. He also puts his radio and tv on so loud that we cant hear our own tv due to the volume of his. It drives me insane.

OP I know that when you're locked in conflict with a neighbour mediation can seem like an utterly pointless exercise and waste of time. I've been there. I agreed to go so the housing would see I was being reasonable and that my neighbour was the problem and they could then take action against her. To my surprise mediation resolved things. We'd never be friends but we did manage to call a truce and live peacefully side by side. Give it a go. You never know, it might surprise you.

You sound like a nightmare neighbour! Look after your home that you've been given and treat your life with respect because otherwise you will get this wherever they move you to! Which will not happen when there are people in greater need with no housing at this very moment. So quit your complaining

I don't think it's unreasonable to watch TV at 3am at a low volume.

Why have you namechanged?

The TV on once at 3am on low volume isnt really anything terrible. I also do it and quite a lot due to doing strange hours with my work. I don't blame you for your response to some people on here who take it upon themselves to twist things but that is AIBU, maybe try another part of mumsnet to post this so the sharks dont get you. I know how awful it is to have a nasty neighbour, it can really affect you (your home is supposed to be a haven) I actually stood up to my neighbour and had a massive showdown, im not suggesting you do this of course but it certainly shut him up

A very mature and sensible attitude op, way to go, good luck, and good luck to your neighbour