We live in a flat. I accept that that means we have to live with a higher level of noise from neighbours than we might do in a house, and I don't think I'm particularly precious about it.
Our NDN likes his music loud - he told us this not long after we moved in and we'd had to knock on his door at midnight on a Sunday to ask him to turn it down. His girlfriend then came round to give us her mobile number 'so that we didn't have to knock and could text them to turn it down like the neighbours the other side do'. So there's obviously been problems previously.
Anyway in the last year or so we have probably either texted or knocked about 5-6 times because their music is too loud. Quite often we have to knock loudly several times as they don't hear it. We've wanted to say something many more times than that but haven't in the interests of neighbourly relations. However in the last week it's been worse than usual and we've had to go round twice. The first time the music was so loud it was drowning out our tv when we got in from work at 7pm. He was apologetic, turned it down but we could still hear it, we just lived with it until it stopped later. Last night it wasn't ridiculously loud but still too loud for us to get to sleep at 10pm, we'd ignored it for the earlier part of the evening. I knocked the door, he answers looking pissed off, says 'it's not THAT loud, we need to have a word about this' and shuts the door. Music gets turned down.
AIBU? We generally don't say anything unless a) it's stupidly loud, which is usually earlier in the day / evening or b) it's keeping us awake, when it doesn't have to be very loud to do so.
He clearly thinks we are. I suspect because it's never ridiculously loud late at night, he thinks that's considerate enough and we're being precious by complaining. I don't want any bad feeling but it looks like it's becoming unavoidable 