Not to contribute to class Christmas present for nasty teacher

[kalebunch]

DD has a nasty and very unprofessional Year 2 teacher at her expensive prep school. The teacher's behaviour has been the cause of numerous complaints to the headmaster. The teacher has never apologised or shown remorse for her actions but she is leaving the school at the end of term. Despite the teacher being disliked by the children, the Class Rep still wants the parents to each donate £20 to a joint class present. AIBU to refuse to donate to this "voluntary" present given the amount of grief this teacher has wreaked on our children?

£20?
I wouldn't even pay that if she was a good teacher!

If there was 20 kids in the class, that amounts to 400 quid, are they planning to get the teacher an iPad or something.

What a total p*ss take asking for £20, schools really do think parents have a bottomless pit of money these days. Just be as brazen as the teacher and say NO. No explanation required.

God, no!

If she gets a £400 present she might decide to stay.

Sounds like the last thing you want.

£20.00 each per parent. Love or loathe the teacher they've got a damn cheek asking for that amount of money right before Christmas and in this climate.
Do they actually live on this planet.

I do spend £20 or more on the teacher at christmas, and the teaching assistant. But if I didn't like them I would not!

I'd refuse to contribute.

Then do her a lovely little card from you to hand over separately, explaining why you haven't contributed and offering her tips for for future on maximising her class gift potential

Asleep, the only reason I mention "expensive" is that DH and I both scrimp and save to send DD to said school. For many parents, £20 is loose change.

Tali there are 24 boys and girls in the class and they always buy the teachers Harrods vouchers and then some. I don't even shop at Harrods for my own family.

That's nearly £500!!!

Fuck that!!!

schools really do think parents have a bottomless pit of money these days

As a teacher, I would be embarrased to receive such a present. This isn't the school's fault!!

Why would you ask this question in the first place. Does sending your child to an 'expensive prep school' mean you have no powers of rational thought?

"schools really do think parents have a bottomless pit of money these days"

It's not the school that's asking for the contribution, it's the class rep, who will be the parent of another child in the class.

Why are you scrimping to send your DD to an expensive prep if the teacher is nasty and unprofessional? Who's to say her successor will be any better?

Just tell her no, if someone is leaving where I work and I don't like them, for whatever reason, I don't contribute or sign the card. It's your choice not the class reps she's just organising it.

As an aside, I'm not even sure of the legality of it.

I'm a teacher and I'm pretty sure that all gifts other than 'nominal' ones (box of chocs or bottle of wine for example) have to be declared.

A few years ago I was in a similar situation. A teacher had made my daughters life hell. I was the only mum who refused to put money in for her leaving collection. I got a lot of snide remarks because I refused but I was glad I stuck to my guns.

Yes, our teachers have to declare/decline gifts over £15 IIRC (collection gifts don't count so long as it's under£15 per donation) because they are employees of the LA and they have strict anti-bribery rules.

A private school wouldn't have that issue.

No way, and I would hope that other parents send the same message if they've been equally unhappy with the teacher.

Am I the only parent who buys a teacher a box of chocolates either from the poundshop, or say £2 from Tesco??

And no, absolutely not unreasonable of you OP

Forget the amount of money - I think that irrelevant here.

Its the principle that's at stake. Material gratification for doing a shit job ? Nah. Good riddance !

I think a lot of the other parents would say the same too. I would quite happily contribute £20 to a collection if I thought it warranted it. But equally I'm strong enough to say its not appropriate - and I'm not a bossy type honestly !

I don't think it's at all unreasonable not to contribute. £20 is a lot anyway - more than a token - and I certainly wouldn't give that to a teacher I didn't like.

YANBU. I wouldn't get involved in a collection even for a great teacher.

Thanks for the clarification, MrsH.