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AIBU?

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Original poster

Awkwardness of stress in pregnancy

19 replies

expectant29 · 14/11/2014 12:10

I had absolutely no idea that the hardest relationship I'd ever have in pregnancy was going to be with my mother.For convenience and financial reasons I still live at home.Her hostility to ex boyfriends has been rather epic in the past.To the extent my partner actually let me pretend he was my gay friend for several weeks just so she'd create less stress while we were trying for a baby.I can't really move in with him yet as I'm looking after seven dogs my mum has taken ownership of while working full-time.Right now she is making life so unpleasant and pressuring me to cheat on and dump my boyfriend even knowing I am liely to be pregnant.She gives my phone number out to men at work and stresses me out with the golden carrot of dump your partner and everything will be pleasant again pretty much.It's starting to make me forget all the great things about my partner and our relationship and I have reoccurring nightmares I am cheating on him with with everyone from Ex boyfriends to Madonna the queen of pop.Now I may be pregnant which I have wanted so much for so long and have an attentive partner and yet I feel unhappy.Has my mother successfully ruined the love and romance and experience since I now feel stressed and see only the negatives about partner?

OP posts:
GailLondon · 14/11/2014 12:25

If she hasn't ruined things yet, it sounds like she will soon! You desperately need some space from her and for her to realise that you are an adult who makes her own decisions.
How long have you been with your partner? Just a bit confused by your comment that you were already trying for a baby and she didnt even know he was your boyfriend...how had you kept the entire relationship secret until then?

youareallbonkers · 14/11/2014 12:28

Why on earth are you trying to get pg in these circumstances. Where are you going to live when the baby is born? Why are you responsible for these dogs?

Charitygirl1 · 14/11/2014 12:33

Yes, your mother is ruining your life and you are bizarrely letting her. How long have you been with this man that you're having a baby with?

maras2 · 14/11/2014 12:35

Stop trying to get pregnant for goodness sake.Shock Move away from your mother;rehome the dogs if necessary < 7 dogs FFS ? >.Then try to get a proper relationship with your partner before even contemplating having a baby.At the moment it seems like a recipe for disaster.

sangfreude · 14/11/2014 13:30

Frankly this sounds like sheer madness.

You need to take some serious stock about what kind of situation you would be bringing a baby into. A partner you pretended was gay? 7 dogs? Mother giving out your number? Doesn't sound the best start you can give a child.

Are you actually pregnant yet?

LadyLuck10 · 14/11/2014 13:36

Very irresponsible of you to be trying to get pregnant while living in an awful situation . What do you expect to happen when a baby does come into the mix? Are you still going to pretend your dp is gay?

ghostyslovesheep · 14/11/2014 13:41

IF this is for real Hmm

wobblyweebles · 14/11/2014 13:54

How old are you?

JamaicanMeCrazy · 14/11/2014 14:38

Right, although this sounds like utter bollocks, I'll answer as though it isn't Hmm

You are mental to think that bringing a baby into that situation is a good idea. If you are already pregnant, get out of there! If not, stop bloody trying until you do get put of there.

I don't understand why you are responsible for your mother's dogs, makes no sense whatsoever. They are your mum's dogs not yours and you don't have to look after them if you don't want to.

How long have you been with your partner?

GotToBeInItToWinIt · 14/11/2014 14:51

One of the strangest threads I've read on mumsnet! How old are you? How long have you been with your partner? Why on earth did you pretend he was gay?!

BolshierAyraStark · 14/11/2014 14:52

Please tell me this is not for real? Hmm

Lets pretend it is for a moment-wtf are you doing attempting to get pregnant in these circumstances?

CoolCat2014 · 14/11/2014 14:53

You're trying to get pregnant with a man you haven't told your mother you're with? Sounds a bit mad to me. How long have you been with him?

I'd suggest you move out & get yourself settled before you try for a baby. If you are already pregnant, look at getting your own place ASAP!

RedToothBrush · 14/11/2014 15:02

To the extent my partner actually let me pretend he was my gay friend for several weeks just so she'd create less stress while we were trying for a baby.

And you thought this was a good idea considering you still live at home?

Yeah ok...

Mammanat222 · 14/11/2014 15:05

My brain is frazzled just reading this.

I don't even know where to begin to be honest.

Move out of your mum's, sort your own life out, stop trying for a baby in such odd circumstances. I think that sums up my thoughts in it all.

If you are already pregnant then hmmmmm. Good luck with it all.

BlueberryWafer · 14/11/2014 15:06

How long have you been with your partner?! And why are you bringing a baby into the mix?

whois · 14/11/2014 15:13

This is so stupid it has to be a wind up. Living at home, trying for a baby with some random you've hardly known and pretending to your mum he's your gay best friend.
Stupid if it's a troll, and doubly stupid if it's for real.

Bulbasaur · 14/11/2014 16:05

What the fuck did I just read?

angelohsodelight · 14/11/2014 17:07

I think you need to grow up and be responsible before having a baby.

BitchPeas · 14/11/2014 18:17

What? What the fuck?

How old are you? Do you have a job? Can you not just pack a bag and walk away from your batshit bonkers mother?

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