to be getting annoyed at H?

[HelpMeGetOutOfHere]

We have a weekly budget each, pocket money in effect. We both get paid into the joint account, I then transfer money out for the bills/savings etc and then we allocate each other free spending money for lunches, etc.

What is really beginning to annoy me is how H will text me nearly every day and ask if im going near a shop. He'll always say bring the milk in or we need bread/tea/sugar etc. and increasingly he asks for cigarettes. The part that annoys me I that this I all coming out of my 'pocket money' he never pays me back. The milk/bread/papers fair enough they are household items and even though I generally don't use them they are for household usage. Its the cigarettes that annoy me. He's just text and asked me to get him 20 cigarettes, well thats almost £10, twice last week, the week before at least once and he gets all huffy when I ask for the cash back.

The reason im posting is because he's just text and asked me again today so would be the third time since sunday and I've said no, now he's all huffy and sent an arsey text. I don't even smoke. OH and guess who's the one always dipping into my pocket money for the dc lunch or the couple of £ they need for non uniform etc?

By my guesswork extrapolating, that's £1500 a year!

Bloody hell!

I would tell him that I am not spending my money on an item that has a 50% chance of killing him. If he wants to kill himself he can pay to do it.

Yes my mistake on the price.
Clearly can't read

My DP used to ask me to get him some beer or wine ( I did not drink any) -and then look aggrieved if I asked him for the money!

Oh no I'm really mean I refuse to buy cigarettes in for Dh because I don't want to Encourage his smoking,I also won't 'lend' him money from my budget for cigarettes. I'm an ex smoker .

If it's no trouble to pick the stuff up, then I'd do it.

I'd keep tab of it through the week and deduct it from his 'spends' the following Friday. If he doesn't like that, he knows not to ask you.

Well, it's not exactly what I'd do because I wouldn't continue to live with such an arse...but as you are, it's the best solution I can think of.

I like the buying menthol idea, because they are all the same really aren't they?

No they are not.

For eg my ultimate preference is regal King sized but they are mega expensive.. next down is Mayfair but the cost is still too high so I'm on jps. I would not thank you for Benson and hedges which rip your throat out and the cheaper stuff you may as well smoke fresh air.

If somebody brought me a pack of menthol I would be less than amused and would go to the shop myself

Ooh, I love me a Benson's. Though I've had Benson's Dual recently...happy mistake on my Tesco order has led me to discover I can buy cigs that are menthol when I want and normal when I don't. I find cheaper cigs are worse on my throat. That said, I don't mind tobacco either. (Sorry to derail)

(Will also be restarting with my electronic soon...real burnable ones really are too expensive.)

Dh smokes menthol, I pinched one off him the other day as I had run out of mine. It was like sucking a tampon through a polo. Would happily go without than try and smoke menthol.

I'm a smoker. My husband is an ex smoker and therefore incredibly sanctimonious and anti smoking. He point blank refuses ever to buy me fags as he says he doesn't want to be complicit in fuelling my habit. Whilst I thought he was a bit of a wanker initially, I have to say, I do actually see his point now. I haven't actually managed to kick the habit but I never ever ask him to pick up fags!

Do you think DillyDally was being facetious gamerchick ?

Tell him smoking makes him smell, turns his teeth and fingers yellow so he can get his own if he insists.

Job done.

Who allocates the pocket money? Because if it's you, then I'd just either deduct if from his next week's allowance, or I'd increase your own to cover the loss.

But it's not just that, is it. It's the fact that he is thoroughly taking the piss and being lazy, as well as robbing your allowance. He somehow thinks he is in a superior position, where he shouldn't have to pick up the odd bits, even his fucking cigs, but you should. AND you should fund it too.

His attitude sucks.

He gets huffy when you ask for the money back. But does he give you the money back?
YANBU.
Dont respond to the huffing. Just collect the money.
He is trying to avoid spending his money. He probably considers his cigarettes to be an essential household item tbh.

Tell him to buy his own cigarettes. End of. Ex smoker here too.

well I paid for he cigarettes with a £10 note and put the change to one side, asked him for the money he told me he only had a £20 note, I said that ok I have change! He handed over the £20 and I gave him the change and a £10 note. I did ignore the huffiness.

I got a back bone thanks to the lovely ladies of MN and told him I don't mind buying him cigarettes but I would either expect payment or take it off of his money for the following week.

Its really not the ££ we aren't well off, but we aren't struggling its the principle.

He has quit several times but always starts again, one time it was after 2yrs of having not smoked??

I've only ever had the odd cigarette when had a few too many drinks. He's always smoked so it doesn't really bother me regarding the smell etc now. He doesn't smoke in the house and has mints before he comes inside.