To not want to give my email/phone details to the class rep?

[WrongWayWound]

Well, self-appointed class rep, unless the PTA had a vote I haven't heard of.

It's 'so we can all keep in touch'. Frankly notes in the book bag, or seeing me at the gate is fine in my book. I've been politely evasive a few times but it's getting pushy with even asking family members for my details if they pick up. This morning I was nearly jumped on and pointed at by 4 women calling out DD's name, I said I had nothing on me.

So as not to drip feed:

-they are VERY pushy for money, it's already starting to grate only 7 weeks into reception. Not the normal amount, I work in a school and it's WAY above the norm.

-The mums I know and like have my details, I'm not hard to track down. I am polite to everyone, and have friends. I've never criticised or moaned about anyone. I foresee my details being used to extend playground squabbles to home from an overbearing core of difficult mums (from playgroups they were cliquey, pushy and not very pleasant to DD, but now we've been thrown together closer by school)

-There is already a lot of pressure from school mums with doing bits, I'll do my bit (though I work when they have all PTA meetings during the day). I don't want 'everyone needs to do this...' or 'your daughter was not nice to xxxx today' in my mailbox. There are other channels to find me, quite easily.

AIB miserable? Does EVERYBODY else always give details? I'll admit I'm just a bit spiky as DD is not having the best start. Not awful, but a lot of being side-lined and under-estimated and a loss of confidence.

We don't have a class rep, but we do have a class list of emails. I use this when I arrange the occasional night out, as do others, or when one of the mums sends round the email for Christmas and EOY collection, with an optional not mandatory donation amount.

I also use it for the birthday party although I do also send invites.

I realise back in ye olde golden days people managed without it, but these days technology has moved on and email is an extremely useful tool.
Also back in ye halycon days perhaps less DMs worked so there was more of a chance of catching them at the school gates, whereas today in our class there's a complete mixture of after school, grandparent pick up and parental pick up.

If someone didn't have their email address that's fine, but as I rarely do pick up at the gates these days, they would miss out on invites to evening out - which is absolutely fine if they don't want to come, but I'd hate someone to then claim they felt excluded because I was unable to contact them.

Rookie it should be optional, kids should not be treated differently because they do not want their details to be handed out randomly. My dd is 7, we managed fine with party invites in bookbags, and parents writing their contact details on the invite. School would normally add leaflets and reminders for events in book bags. The PTA would aso give teachers leaflets to put in book bags. Works fine to me!

If your child wants child A to come to their party, theirparents haven't given their details to the class rep or on a class list, then you give the the invite to the teacher to put in the book bag, you don't then not invite them because of this! Equally if you want a playdate with a child, you see the parents in collection, or if you work, you give an invite in an envelope for your CM to give to the teacher to put in that childs book bag. Works fine for me.

Arethere, there might be very good reasons as to why people don't want to give out their details to anyone as highlighted above, some simply don't, that is fair enough. You should not be made to feel bad because because of it. My details were on class list, but I understand why some might not.

Having a class list of the child's name and their parents/carers would be useful. Saying hi to someone for a term but not knowing/forgetting their name can get a bit awkward sometimes. You normally collect e-mail addresses along the way as needed.

OP - could you just say you don't have a personal e-mail address and your work is not keen on personal messages coming through.

OP are you sure you are not overthinking this? 2 parent of our class opted out of emails, but the rest of us only gets emails about fairs and parent drinks. Oh and asking fir money for teacher's christmas or leaving presents. Don'r see why they should bother 'finding you' if you don't want to give your number or email. Just give it and then set a tone of ignoring what is not relevant.

If it is true in op case, she has every right not to give these people her details, they are boardering on harassing. Yes I can imagine some might be like that, especially reading some of the school gate politics threads on here.

Mabey quite rightly op doesent want to be involved in all that!

Op I think you should have jusr said thanks but no thanks in the first place.

I'm not having a dig, just curious...do schools with class reps not have the school text message service and newsletters, or is class reps more for the social aspect? We don't have them.

She should just tell them, no thank you I do not wish to give my details, should suffice. If you want to contact me see me after school, or pass a message into the teacher to put in childs book bag.

I've seen them used, in my jobs in schools, from everything to imply affairs are taking place to publically accuse others of bullying.

I have never seen anything even remotely like this and I'm on two 'informal' class rep lists.

I've had reminders for 'own clothes day' fortunately and been reunited with some stray PE kit and a cardigan amongst other things.

I know at least one Mum who is almost never at the school gate and its invaluable to her.

If I were you I'd seen what its being used for -it may be really helpful- rather than judge it based on some other experience. If you don't like it block the sender in future.

Wanttosqueeze in the op case it will not be useful, it will be just more harassment more hassle. Can I remind you that it's not simply being difficult if a parent or carer does not want to give their details, tgey çoukd be feeling an abusive relationship, looked after child, job related, or simply do not wish to. It should be opt in rather than opt out.

Yeah, because being told when the Christmas disco is and being asked if you can bak a cake for next Friday is soooooooo harassment!

Hakulet you prove my point exactly. I was referring to the op, have you read it!

I've never heard of a PTA class rep, despite being linked to several primary schools, you live and learn!

How do PTAs manage these class lists from a Data Protection perspective? Do the "class reps" have to confirm they have a certain level of IT security and sign some kind of disclaimer? Presumably, if they then use the info to address personal issues (your DC was mean to my DC kind-of-thing) they could have their responsibilities revoked?

I know several IT savvy parents who are always looking to prove a point and would take great delight in "reporting" a PTA to the Data Commissioner for the slightest breach of the DPA (including my exH) - it's a minefield, isn't it?

I would have thought it easier & much less stressful to give an email address to the class rep. Setup a separate one if you don't want then to have your usual one. You can simply press delete if you are not interested in the messages coming through.

What's the big deal? They only want to include you. You are avoiding dealing with this which is actually what is causing you stress as they will keep asking.

Yep. Create a new email address and give them that one. Sorted.

But that would mean no opportunity to PTA bash, wouldn't it?

Aeroflot I'm in full agreement that anyone who doesn't want to be on a class list shouldn't have to be. I've found it useful, doesn't mean anyone else will or should.

If the OP had simply said "no thankyou" instead of being evasive a few times I don't think this thread would be here!

And the OP has no idea if the class rep emails will be useful because she's never received any - just declined because of what she 'forsees' and someone elses experience at another school.

And to answer your question OP there is 1 parent who is not on our class list. No idea why. Not interested. The child is still invited to parties etc

Just say "I don't want to be on it thanks".

BTW: what are they VERY pushy for money for 7 weeks into reception?

Stardust my experience of the class list is that each parent gives an email address to 1 person -who has been leaned on by the PTA- . Said person distributes the list to the class.

Address doesn't come from school. It's not official. There is no database, addresses are not bought or sold.

Its just like privately emailing a group of friends -most of whom you don't know very well-. The PTA don't give out any details.

Have never heard of this whole class rep / class email list thing. Why on earth would you need one? If our school need to remind parents about something then they send a text out or there's a note in the bag. Why on earth would a parent have to do it? And why would they collect money? For what? Am I missing something?

I know this is being a nit pernicky but I guess as it has a committee the PTA is an organisation subject to data protection act? Hence needs to be more diligent when it comes to peoples personal information?

John - our class rep organises stuff like parent socials(non fund raising), the volunteer reading and cooking rotas, the snow tree, etc. all non essential but nice stuff for the kids and the school. We get about 6 emails a term.

arethere, what is a snow tree and why do you need a cooking rota?? Sounds like English schools are more different from ours than I thought!

We have PTA class reps but no contact lists and never felt the need for them, even though I am on the PTA and have been a class rep. I have got contact details for most of the other families in the DCs classes acquired gradually but would not like them shared with everyone. However ours is the sort of school where you have to wait with the DCs in the playground till the doors open throughout KS1 and pick up there too, nearly everyone walks and there are plenty of opportunities to speak to other parents. It might be different if we were all picking up in a big crowd at one gate, or dropping off by car, DCs catching buses etc.

The class reps only deal with PTA stuff, either by sending notes in book bags (but mostly they go via the office and 99% come from the chair not individual class reps) or just speaking to people. Volunteer reading etc are organised directly by teachers, all reminders about mufti days, etc come from the office. Social stuff is just organised between the parents. If you are stuck for another parent's contact details, perhaps because you don't do drop-off and pick up the school can pass on a message to the relevant parent for you.

JohnCusacksWife - nope - all 3 of mine have been thru English Primary schools and I've been associated with others in various ways, and I've never heard of a cooking rota or a snow tree either