To hope that play dates get better as DC get older?

[MATB1]

I used to love having people over but now it's just grim. The house gets destroyed, DD1 gets overexcited and emotional, the other kid(s) just annoy me....

DD1 is 3 btw. Do play dates get better as they get older or am I pissing in the wind?

arethereanyleftatall - you've not had the ones I've had round.

Bowl of spaghetti on head
Shampoo handprints all round the bathroom wall.
Mattresses off bed - as they'd be good as a slide down the stairs.
I like to eat my dinner naked
I can sit on the radiators if I want to (shortly after a kitchen flood which took 9 months to resolve)
And the fork stabber...

I nanny so different of course but I love having their friends over (aged 3 & 4 now). They have a great time together, noise level goes up of course but it's fun. I love the conversations between them too, they are adorable together. They have formed great friendships and are wonderful sharing and playing together! Place is cluttered with toys but once everyone helps it doesn't take long to clear up.

My DS is 3. Playdates used to ne bouncing a cute baby on your knee while eating cake. Now its like some sort of mob mentality where they take the cake from you, decide they don't want it and grind it into the carpet. Then they go on some sort of crusade to empty every puzzle/box in the house. No time to chat as busy acting referee and enforcing fucking sharing.

This is it exactly. And the other mums are all my best pals which somehow makes it worse.....

Glad I'm not a weirdo for thinking all this - was worried I'm being a right party pooper / socially anxious mum who was going to damage the DDs.

I spoke to another mum friend today about it and she said she rarely, if ever, has people over now for the same reasons.

Bloody pesky kids.

Hate them too. Had a sleepover last month and it was awful. Rude child. Not doing anything like that again for a long long time.

DD1's birthday is coming up. That will be fun with 6 of them

We have a nice big playroom with some double doors that open into the garden for the summertime. It has sofas in there as well as ALL the kids toys / junk etc.
The rule is that they can do what they like in there (within reason) - make mess, noise, get all the toys all over the floor etc but the rest of the house is MINE and when they're in it they will behave properly. They are not to scream, tear around climb on things and make a mess. No visitors ever go upstairs, bedrooms are for sleeping and other quiet , calm activities such as reading (this seems to help at bedtime too as the bedroom is associated with relaxation and not playtime). All toys are in the playroom and stay there.

It seems to work well. As they get older they'll need less supervision so while at the moment we have to sit in the playroom during playdates, in a couple of years we will be able to sit in the house or garden and have a nice time while they play.