Why do you feel sorry for us OP? Why should we get a grip? We don't celebrate it, because we don't want to celebrate it. We don't believe in it. Whatever the origins are. Children don't miss what they heave never had. We don't just sit in and watch TV and be boring. We either go to a different sort or party, with other christian friends (a light party, although this year we are doing a cowboys and Indians party, and last year was princesses, princes and superheroes, the year before was animals (Noah's ark) the dc are excited to dress up) or we play together, bake cakes or biscuits and do something fun as a family that doesn't involve darkness and scary, ghoulish things. Just because everyone else is doing it, and everyone else is having fun doing it, doesn't mean that we have to as well. It's not the only way to have fun on Halloween.
Don't feel sorry for my dc, they are very happy, and right now are having fun making bits and pieces for the cowboys and Indians party.
If a Jewish poster came on MN and expressed her concern why other people do not celebrate Hanukkah, or if a Muslim OP expressed why other people do not celebrate Eid, and that your children were missing out on fun, you would probably reply, because you are not Jewish or Muslim and that your children were not missing out because you have fun in other ways.
And so it is with us. We don't celebrate it, because we don't agree with what it stands for, or believe in any form of ghosts or whatever, we don't believe that they come back for a day of the year or whatever, we don't like looking at horror, or gory or scary things and we don't like to teach our children to beg for sweets.
We dress up (as non scary things) and have sweets and games in other ways, so please don't sorry for us, we are just fine.