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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Local Waitrose supporting anti-abortion charity

230 replies

WaitroseSucks · 27/10/2014 17:00

Waitrose gives shoppers tokens to drop into collecting points to support local charities. My local Waitrose is currently supporting a 'pregnancy counselling service'. I checked the 'charity's' website, which has all the usual guff about offering 'impartial advice', then checked their parent company and discovered that it's run by these guys.

AIBU to think Waitrose should check the credentials of 'charities' before collecting on their behalf? I imagine there would be outrage if Waitrose openly supported a charity like Abortion Rights, whose name does what it says on the tin.

Have tried to contact someone at my local store, but relevant person is 'away until Wednesday'. Meanwhile the collection points will continue to operate and unwary shoppers will be supporting a 'charity' that is concealing its true agenda.

Have name changed for this, but am MN regular.

OP posts:
Original poster
WaitroseSucks · 27/10/2014 17:55

Well, people do get to vote.....it's not as though Waitrose have just decided to donate the money.
What do you mean? Who votes? If you mean customers choose what box to drop their token into, my point is that it's not clear what the 'charity' does. It's misrepresenting itself IMO and Waitrose should be aware of this.

OP posts:
Dawndonnaagain · 27/10/2014 18:42

Have complained via social media.

Viviennemary · 27/10/2014 19:04

People do get to choose which slot to put their token in. And some women want the support these charities give.

alemci · 27/10/2014 19:09

fair does Waitrosesucks Smile

alemci · 27/10/2014 19:09

doos

Carrierpenguin · 27/10/2014 19:16

Why don't you just choose not to drop your coin in that box? Many charities are contentious - Islamic aid, Christian aid, cancer charities that test on animals. You can't expect Waitrose to allow shoppers to support only charities that you like.

NoArmaniNoPunani · 27/10/2014 19:17

People do get to choose which slot to put their token in. And some women want the support these charities give.

Really, some women going for abortion counselling want to be told they'll end up as child abusers if they abort?

RustyParker · 27/10/2014 19:21

I'll do my bit on social media too.

Carrierpenguin · 27/10/2014 19:22

Maybe if you complain enough they'll stop the charity thing altogether if it's too much hassle to them, then all the other charities will suffer.

I really think you should drop more coins in the other boxes and leave it.

SevenZarkSeven · 27/10/2014 19:22

You see for some people having the option to support this is like having an option to support the BNP or a terrorist group.

It is an intensely divisive issue and I can't imagine for one minute that Waitrose realised what this group do / what their background is / what they are a front for.

It was probably a person sitting in the back office going "Local hospital equipment - fine - Update local playground initiative -fine - helping pregnant women - fine".

What I doubt it was, was Waitrose plc management saying"Right at this point of our strategy, it's time to throw ourselves into the thorny abortion issue, by supporting a fairly dogy pro-life group, and without consulting the Partners who make up our business".

And hence, people are drawing it to their attention.

I will be interested to see how this plays out.

"Don't put your coin in that box" pfft.

Interesting that pro-life types are happy to accept money from people who are being misled as to what they are donating to. Samaritan's purse anyone? Revolting behaviour.

SevenZarkSeven · 27/10/2014 19:25

"Maybe if you complain enough they'll stop the charity thing altogether if it's too much hassle to them, then all the other charities will suffer.

I really think you should drop more coins in the other boxes and leave it."

LOL

This is a NATIONWIDE thing run in all the branches successfully for some years they are hardly going to cancel the whole thing because they cocked up in Worthing and someone pointed it out! Blimmin eck.

And it's not "coins" it's TOKENS. You get ONE when you shop and you put it in one of the boxes and Waitrose donate a set amount of money that they split proportionately by the number of tokens for each.

Original poster
WaitroseSucks · 27/10/2014 19:27

Why don't you just choose not to drop your coin in that box? Many charities are contentious - Islamic aid, Christian aid, cancer charities that test on animals. You can't expect Waitrose to allow shoppers to support only charities that you like.

The point is (repeats self) that when you read 'pregnancy counselling charity' the first thing that springs to most people's mind is not 'anti-abortion' group. If the box said 'Anti-abortion charity' I, and others, would be able to make an informed choice about supporting or not. I shouldn't have to come home, google, look for parent company, delve around for true picture, etc...

Is that so difficult to understand? As someone said upthread, it's a bit like the shoebox thing: portrayed as lovely fluffy thing (giving presents to disadvantaged children) when the reality is absolutely different.

OP posts:
Original poster
WaitroseSucks · 27/10/2014 19:28

Maybe if you complain enough they'll stop the charity thing altogether if it's too much hassle to them, then all the other charities will suffer.

I really think you should drop more coins in the other boxes and leave it.

Yes, let's all turn a blind eye and let the anti-abortion lobbyists get on with things unchallenged.

OP posts:
OddFodd · 27/10/2014 19:31

VivienneMary - no woman considering a termination needs the support of an anti-abortion charity. Contrary to what many anti-abortionists believe, pro-choice charities are exactly that - about choice

This is an organisation with an agenda. It's another Operation Christmas Child

Viviennemary · 27/10/2014 19:32

I think people should have the right to be against abortion if they think it's wrong. People all over the world of different religions don't believe in abortion. Myself I am not pro or against because all circumstances are different but I think each side deserves their say.

5madthings · 27/10/2014 19:34

How do I find this on Twitter op, if you get no where with speaking to your local waitrose I will tweet etc.

Viviennemary · 27/10/2014 19:34

Didn't see your post Oddfold. But it's unlikely a person would approach such a charity if they had absolutely made up their minds to have a termination. And whatever people say some women are more or less forced into a corner to have a termination they don't really want.

hoobypickypicky · 27/10/2014 19:35

Carrierpenguin, the concern isn't what the charity does or stands for, as unacceptable as an anti abortion organisation is to me, it's that the charity is masquerading as a pregnancy choice advisory service when in fact many of its centres are actively putting pressure on women to go ahead with pregnancies by scaremongering and lying.

The difference between this lot and, say, Cancer Research, is that it's a well known fact that CR fund animal experiments and they don't try to hide that.

5madthings · 27/10/2014 19:35

Yes they deserve a say but not by being sneaky and underhand and spouting LIES to women who are vulnerable. They are pretending to be something they are not!

Original poster
WaitroseSucks · 27/10/2014 19:35

Of course people have the right to be against abortion. No-one is arguing about that. However, people who are anti abortion should not be 'counselling' others.

OP posts:
whathaveiforgottentoday · 27/10/2014 19:38

Why are people going onto social media already. Did you complain today, as if that is the case, give waitrose the chance to rectify it first.
Obviously they haven't checked the charities properly but seriously, it's not the crime of the century. OP, you were right to flag it up and contact waitrose and maybe head office but that's enough for now.

OddFodd · 27/10/2014 19:41

If a woman is pregnant and doesn't want to have a termination, then she doesn't need counselling does she?

And as 5madthings says, if they're overt about it, that's one thing. It's the sneaky underhand way of going about it that's the problem. And that if they hadn't been so sneaky, many of the good shoppers of Worthing Waitrose wouldn't be donating their green tokens.

motherofmonster · 27/10/2014 19:45

Think it is more the fact that they are not being upfront with what this charity stands for. It would not occur to me that it would have been a charity already investigated for pressuring women to go ahead with a pregnancy ( that's not support, that's forcing your opinion) by frankly absurd claims such as women who have abortions are more likely to die of cancer and go onto abuse children.

specialsubject · 27/10/2014 19:47

anyone who is against offering the choice of abortion needs to be prepared to put their money where their mouth is, by offering to take on an unwanted child (who may be severely disabled).

I doubt anyone goes for an abortion without thinking hard about it, although the anti-choice lot seem to believe this is the case.

don't want an abortion? Don't have one.

I would boycott Waitrose but we don't have them north of Watford.

TsukuruTazaki · 27/10/2014 19:49

As someone who has personal experience of care confidential, I had nothing but a positive experience of their service.

I received counselling there after having an abortion which I deeply regretted. My counsellor was extremely professional and didn't spread lies of any kind. On the first meeting they are open about the fact they are a Christian organisation and ask if you are religious or want to include any religious based discussion within your sessions. I said I wasn't and religion was never brought up again.

It was quite conventional and similar to counselling I have received through other channels e.g. NHS or universities for other issues, although personally I found Care Confidential better as I clicked with the particular counsellor I had and found her very empathetic, patient and kind. In my experience the agenda was very much pro-choice and they were keen to work through the guilt and shame associated with my decision. I personally found their stance more neutral than the likes of BPAS/Marie Stopes.

I'm not saying that I think they are an ideal charity for Waitrose to support as I can see how it could be somewhat controversial, but wanted to add my 2p as I often see people slating them without having any experience of them. By all accounts it seems the standards are not the same across all their centres and if anyone is given misinformation, castigated for their decision and made to feel worse then of course that is awful, but personally I am grateful for their valuable help and support in a very dark time in my life.