Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

About Doctors behaviour

41 replies

SomeRandomNickname · 27/10/2014 16:58

Went to the GP earlier to get DD (8wks) checked (worried about her breathing where she's had a cold).

I had her laid along my lap (knees together), and to examine her chest the GP put one leg either side of mine, and pushed in so that his crotch was right against my knees. I felt really uncomfortable and tried to edge back, he said "it's ok", but I really didn't like it.

AIBU to think that's a bit odd?

OP posts:

LadyLuck10 · 27/10/2014 17:00

Ohfourfoxache · 27/10/2014 17:01

Erm, sounds a bit odd tbh - presumably there was a couch if more space was needed?

BabyMarmoset · 27/10/2014 17:05

Well it's not easy to be certain from what you have said. He may have just felt that this was the best way to get a good view/ get close to your young baby without moving/disturbing her.

But if you felt like he was too close, then that matters regardless of his intent. Drop an email to the practice manager. Then at least he will have flagged that he needs to be more careful in his actions. If this is a one off then I'd be amazed if it had any repercussions for him. If this isn't the first complaint then there is a clear issue and hopefully the practice manager will take action.

socially · 27/10/2014 17:08

Are you usually this uptight?

Aeroflotgirl · 27/10/2014 17:09

Usually doctors have a examination couch. When my babies were sick tge Dr always told me to lie then on tge couch.

NeedsAsockamnesty · 27/10/2014 17:09

I wouldn't chances are I wouldn't notice BUT what matters is how you feel about it.

How you feel is the important bit

northernlurker · 27/10/2014 17:12

Oh for crying out loud - you were holding the very young baby. So in order to examine the very young baby without distressing her (or you) he moved close and examined her. What else do you think he was possibly doing? Getting a thrill from your knees? Is there another reason why you are very sensitive about this sort of contact? Because if there is then I think you should seek support with that issue. If there is not another reason for this then I think you need to look at situations with a less paranoid eye.

WipsGlitter · 27/10/2014 17:13

I don't know. A few years ago the GP was very close to me when listening to DSs heart but it was the only way he could do it without him wriggling.

Gileswithachainsaw · 27/10/2014 17:15

I do t think it's that unusual tbh. There have been times I've had to hold Dds really firmly so the Dr can look in mouth or ears.
And as they are on my lap that means he or she has had to pull in very close.

Dr could not have had a good listen if she was crying or upset or rolling about on the couch. As she was still and quiet it made sense to do it on ur lap.

Perhaps they should get stethoscope extenders

WorraLiberty · 27/10/2014 17:15

I agree with northernlurker

Sirzy · 27/10/2014 17:18

Sometimes doctors have to get close to examine young children.

HappyHalloweenMotherFucker · 27/10/2014 17:22

This sounds perfectly ok to me

Doctors are trained more these days in helping young children to feel at ease, so don't insist they are laid out on examination tables which tends to distress them and hinder the exam

He probably just moved in quickly whilst LO was settled and happy on your lap

ROUNDandROUNDINCIRCILESMORETHA · 27/10/2014 18:05

just don't see that one again. simple.
Or if you still feel uneasy about it still tomorrow then perhaps send an email to the practise manager. But it sounded as though he might have been aware you were uncomfortable by saying it's ok.

Ipigglemustdie · 27/10/2014 18:06

My hygienist leans over me and sometimes rest her boob on my shoulder. Think its more to do with the fact shes a large lady and its the easiest way to clean my teeth than being a pervert

ArabellaTarantella · 27/10/2014 18:16

Do you get as uptight when going to the opticians for an eye examination?

Hatespiders · 27/10/2014 18:21

I don't think it's anything to worry about tbh.

I rather like it when I go to have my eyes tested. The optician is a very tasty young Sikh, and when he gazes deep into each eye with that bright light thing, his face about an inch from mine, and he smells deliciously of spicy aftershave....

Chippednailvarnish · 27/10/2014 18:33

Interesting first post.

Dragonfly71 · 27/10/2014 18:37

Yanbu. The doctor must have been aware of where his crotch was, and should have been able to examine the baby without it pressing against your knee. I would contact practice manager as he needs to be aware this made you uncomfortable and it would make many women uncomfortable, intentional or not.

onerepublic · 27/10/2014 18:37

I think it's a bit odd.

Don't understand why people feel the need to start calling the OP uptight, either?

Oh wait, I do. It's another game of "I'm so much more laidback than yoooouuu" that some MNers just love to play.

This place is a shithole sometimes, it really is. Hate the way women attack each other given half a chance

steff13 · 27/10/2014 18:45

It doesn't sound particularly weird to me. Was the baby asleep? Why didn't he lay the baby up on the exam table?

lougle · 27/10/2014 18:53

Young babies are floppy and most don't like to be laid on their front. The only way to ascertain whether their chest is of concern is to.....listen to their chest. There's no point in listening to their chest when they're distressed or in an unnatural position.

It isn't nice if someone is in your 'comfort zone' but sometimes it's unavoidable.

LongTimeLurking · 27/10/2014 18:54

Was he literally rubbing his crotch against your knee (creepy) or just very close without touching (he may not have been aware).

FunkyBoldRibena · 27/10/2014 18:56

Yes, he wouldn't know if his cock was rubbing against the OP's leg. After all, he's a doctor and doctor's can't...oh, hang on a minute...

MegTeg · 27/10/2014 18:59

He would have been focused on trying to get close enough to examine properly, and so possibly less sensitive to personal space etc than if that wasnt the aim. But only you were there so will know how it felt to be in the situation and if it felt more inappropriate than just the feel of being very close?

QuillPen · 27/10/2014 19:00

I agree with LongTimeLurking... Pressing his crotch into your knees does sound unnecessary unless you have really long thighs and frankly quite creepy. His crotch being vaguely near your knees is fine IMO.

Flip

1 2