Sorry, did not mean to post and run.
The cooking is not not the worst part (Norwegian traditional meal of rack of pork ribs with crackling, potatoes, home made sauerkraut, stewed apricots and prunes) Like turkey, it cooks itself, and some last minute faff with the trimmings. We celebrate our Christmas on Christmas eve. The days are a rush, as traditionally the house and the tree is decorated on the 23rd, but we could do on the 22nd to space it out a bit.
It is true that the meal is not the important part of the day. The gifts, and the cemetery are... It is time to reflect on family, life and death and deep things. We never have time to go to Church, though.
It will be difficult logistics. We need to time it perfectly, as my dad will require wheelchair transport to and from the carehome. It is often an hour to wait for a taxi with wheelchair capabilities, on either end, even if prebooked. Maybe I can manage to get him into my car, and just use his lightweight travel wheelchair, but it will be uncomfortable for him to sit in, and he wont have the ease of movement as he will be dependent on somebody pushing him, as opposed to his big motorized chair. He only has some use of one hand.
It will be difficult both from a logistics and an emotional perspective. The kids will not enjoy spending hours at the care home. The last couple of Christmases has been more and more difficult as my mum has gotten worse and worse (Alzheimers).
I am sure my uncle and grandparents will understand if they get their lantern on the 25th instead.
Maybe we just have to evolve new traditions. Spread stuff out.
Sympathy to all of you, and thanks for responding.
And 
to STD too, I have no idea what you said, but I think you need flowers, and possibly 
too.