To be hesitant to freeze breast milk?

[Reddottys12]

I've read that by freezing breast milk you lose some of the goodness in it. I've also read that its quite common for it to sometimes go off.

I'm torn between: wanting the occasional morning/afternoon/evening off by allowing someone else to feed my son with expressed milk so that I can go and do something for myself like have a hair cut or have my nails done AND: worrying that my 3 month old might get bad milk or worse, worry where his mummy has gone!

I'd have to freeze the milk cos it takes me ages to expeess just enough for 1 feed!

I'm also getting pressure, from a lot of mums who formula feed, to leave my son for an evening so I can go out with dh. They say how important it is and how good it was for them. As lovely as that sounds, my son needs to be nursed to sleep and when he wakes up, I'm the only one that can comfort him. He only ever wants me...in all honesty its the boob he actually wants.

So...do I just do it and see what happens one day. Or do I listen to my gut which keeps telling me that he's only small for a short period and to suck it up. I can always do those things when he's a bit older and doesn't have an attachment to my boobs.

Do what feels right to you. You can express and then use a feed up within a day or so (go to kellymom for precise instructions) without freezing it, or freeze a bit. Depends on if your little one will take a bottle. Lots of children have frozen milk and it's not going to have long term issues for a handful of feeds ( or more!).

I did every bedtime til my son stopped nursing at 1, and don't regret it at all- though found I could go out after 7.30 as long as I was back by 11ish for his next feed time. Not that I wanted to much (zzzz). I also worked full time from six months, so felt that bed time was 'my' special time. At 2.5, he's had his mum or dad at bedtime every night apart from once when we went to the theatre and grandparents were staying. That's what feels right to us; believe in your feelings.

Firstly, don't be pressurised by other people. It's not up to them how you feed your baby and when you feel ready to leave him. Do what feels right. If you need a break though, one bottle of formula won't hurt if you can't express enough. I haven't frozen breastmilk, so I don't have any practical advice. I used to express a bottle or 2 if I wanted to have a break
/ go to the hairdressers. DD wouldn't take a bottle at first but was great at it by about 4 or 5 months. You might find your Ds takes a while to get used to bottles. But you won't enjoy yourself if you're fretting about leaving him or how he's going to be fed. He's tiny, there's loads of time to leave him yet.

We haven't gone out loads, haven't left her overnight and still have a great relationship! DD is 16 months now and still won't go to bed at night without me but can be left in the evenings very happily and will nap in the day if she's with my mum. DH and I have had 4 proper dates, the first when she was 11 months, since she was born and go out to see our own friends regularly on our own. I'm happy with how things are and glad that I've trusted my instincts and done what feels right for all of us.

I used to freeze breast milk - I expressed to donate. My freezer was full of the stuff!

Don't be pressurised to do anything you don't feel comfortable with, but also do consider the possibility of relaxing a little.

I was in exactly the same situation with my firstborn. I expressed after each feed but was only able to get 1.5 fl oz at a time so I froze these tiny portions. They never got used and it was heartbreaking to throw them away (after my child had been weaned for a year) given how much effort it had been to make them.

Looking back I feel I was being very PFB. When a mum in PFB mode thinks "my baby needs" it is really more like "my baby is used to". Babies like familiarity and make a fuss when anything I changed (e.g. introducing the idea that nutrition can come in a bottle, and can taste a bit different to boob milk, or that one can go to sleep without being nursed all the way there) but you would not change do a child any harm to introduce changes and not let the fuss put you off. Sooner than you think the new thing is the new normal and there's no more fuss.

But to answer the simpler question in your post - really do not worry about the effect of freezing on the nutritional value of the milk. If there is an effect, it's just one feed, it's not going to make much difference.

When I had quite a surplus of milk in the freezer the breast milk bank took it all off my hands and told me that they were able to use all three litres of it!!

Essentially, if the milk bank will willingly use frozen milk for hospitalised babies then it can't lose that much nutritional value when frozen.

I might be worth checking the Breastfeeding Network website for information on expressing and storing breastmilk - they do a really good leaflet, which you might be able to print off yourself, explaining how long milk can be stores at what temperatures. IRIC it lasts a surprisingly long time in a fridge, so you might not need to freeze it.

As to whether or not you should express so that you can get some time alone, or with your DH - I say go with your gut feeling. If you don't feel it's right for you or your baby I doubt you'd enjoy the time away from him, and he won't be so little and dependent on you for very long - enjoy it while it lasts!

I used to freeze breast milk. Someone at the time told me that it had to be frozen in glass bottles not plastic. So that's what I did. Really don't know if that was right or wrong but the DC survived.

My baby was fed expressed milk, often frozen and defrosted, for the first three weeks of her life as a tiny premmie in nicu. I doubt the hospital would go this if the nutrition was lost as these babies are desperate for all they can get.

Kellymom has good advice on storage. Also, if you buy milk storage bags, they will have the storage guidelines with them (at least the medala ones I use do and I am sure the others must). I've never heard about storing in glass. The hospital stored the milk in plastic bottles and so do I at home.

Yabu to worry about freezing. However ime it is a lot of hassle storing and giving expressed milk and I would onnly bother if I had to be out for a long time. For hair cuts etc, feed just before you go. Whoever is babysitting can always comfort LO in other ways or take out for a walk in the pram if unsettled. You could even try a dummy? For evenings I just accepted that while doing evening cluster feeding I couldn't go out. By around 3 or 4 months I was occasionally able to go out to meet friends for a drink but would go later in the evening once dd was in bed around 9.30. People were pleased to see me and understood why I was limited with time. Dh isn't bothered about going out anyway but we managed a posh lunch for our anniversary leaving dd with grandparents for a couple of hours. Now at 8 months I have fully weaned to formula and I will admit to enjoying the freedom but that's not why I switched. Do yoh have any friends that bf? They will be in the same boat as you.

I imagine your son only settles for you because he knows you're there. Give your baby's other carers (dad especially?) a chance to learn how to settle him in their own ways. It may be a little stressful but they can both find a way, it will boost their relationship & the other carer's confidence. You're possibly doing them both a disservice by not giving them a chance to build separate relationship. And yes it is good for you to keep other identities going, too.

I donated breastmilk which naturally had to be frozen for storage (well, pasteurised as well, even). It was like Liquid Gold for premie babies, helps them come on tremendously. Lots of goodness still in frozen breastmilk.

It's two separate issues really... The milk will be fine frozen. The issue is - do you want to go out and leave your little baby at home? If your gut feeling is no, then just don't do it. I similarly have friends who seem to go out just as much now they have a three month old - and they are always on at me that I need to go out at night. Well, I don't actually, so I'm not going to go until I feel like it. It's well known around here that I descend into the 'baby bubble' and resurface when they are about 15 months. Fine by me. Me and DH still love each other!

Thanks ladies! Much appreciated insights x

I froze my breast milk because DS was in SCBU. So I would express and keep it in the freezer at the hospital so they could feed him when I wasn't there. There was tons of milk in the freezer, so I assume most of the breast-feeding mums did this, otherwise they'd have to be there 24/7. And at the time, DS was only having a few ml via tube, so I was expressing way more milk than he'd ever consume.

Regarding having a night off and leaving your baby at home with DP. I eventually formula fed as breastfeeding didn't quite go according to plan. But I didn't leave DS at home without me until he was 9 months. Do only what you feel comfortable with. If your friends keep mentioning it, a simple, "No, we're not ready to do that yet" should suffice.

One tip - if you do freeze milk, do it in tiny portions. I ended up with 2l of milk in 150ml bags which I was saving for a day away. But DC stopped accepting a bottle, so it was useless. I wanted to use it for cooking, but it's in far too big portions and I don't want to defrost and refreeze. I've wasted so much!

(I'm another person who gave their baby frozen expressed milk in neonatal, btw. The nurse was keen to freeze so nothing got wasted)

"worrying that my 3 month old might get bad milk or worse, worry where his mummy has gone!"

I'd be going out for a few hours (or even less, just a short walk or to the shops) purely because of that. Your 3 month old needs to learn that mummy always comes back and that daddy is also a trusted adult who can comfort him just fine, not that mummy never leaves his sight and is the only person who can look after him.

DS had donated breastmilk in hospital, it had definitely been frozen and thawed because it all was. Total non-issue. I used to freeze mine in tiny amounts as I was rubbish at expressing, in plastic bottle liners. I really wasn't a "go out" person at all but having it in the freezer meant that if I wanted to go do something, I could, without it being a huge deal that I had to be back for the next feed and the world would end if there was a big traffic jam or a bus was massively late. "Something" was only rarely more than a bit of Christmas shopping and I often got back before baby even wanted to be fed again, but it was a safety net.

Freezing it is fine. I freeze in ice cubes.

Don't be pressured to leave your baby. It is only for a few short months when they really do need you - nothing in the grand scheme of things.

Alternatively - I too have a 3 month old, and she goes to sleep around 7. We just take her out with us in the pram, and get a sitter for the older one. I wasn't sure but it works fine :)

Also get a sling and go out for dinner anyway? We used to do that with DS1 - DP used to look like he was carrying a slightly peculiar man bag! Tiny babies are fine in restaurants - much better than when they are weaned and have to sit with you throwing food about

Thanks all. I've definitely decided I'm not yet ready to go out for an evening and leave him but I've taken your advice and will start freezing milk just in case I do need to go out for something during the day or can't get back in time for a feed. No harm in having a little stock pile! Thanks also for the tip on freezing in smaller quantities so as not to waste.

I used to freeze in small quantities. I think I read somewhere that as long as you don't give mire than two feeds a day of frozen milk then your fine - as you said it looses it's nutrients ( but could wrong)

Don't worry about freezing at all hun, but i think like the others say the other issue is leaving the baby. I couldn't believe how obsessed people were with seperating me with my baby. Now i'm no hippy or anything but in general i found it less hassle to just feed him and be around, i didn't want to leave him. He was quite happy with dh when i was out if the room or on a walk with him. In saying that he did have some ebm in a bottle on a few occasions and i did a few things. I found wears off. I actually think some of it is natures way if stopping u doing too much, when i did express and go out for night i was wrecked for the week! Good luck xxx

I would do a trial run with the freezing because there's a rare condition which can make the milk taste soapy when it's been frozen, so check first before you freeze all of it and then find out it's ruined!

On the other topic, make your excuses, do what you feel is best :) I didn't feel I wanted to go out and leave my baby when he was tiny and I don't regret that at all. I think I went out twice before he was a year old and I didn't miss it at all.

I have frozen quite a bit of breastmilk and was told by both the HV and the breastfeeding network that, although it does lose some nutrients, it's still better for baby than formula. I'm now on formula full time and only get out frozen supplies when DS is poorly!

I had to freeze it when I donated to milk bank, it must be OK.