To think Asperger's syndrome is underdiagnosed in girls and women

[SomeoneDrankMySodaWater]

and that HCP are less likely to refer a woman for a diagnosis than they are a man?

I know that's not exactly newsworthy and I'm not posting anything revolutionary here but I have been wondering if it's really more common in boys at all and whether it's actually closer to a 50/50 split. Just that girls often get missed for diagnosis but their male counterparts don't.

I have suspected that I am on the spectrum for years but have never really been sure. Everything I've read about Asperger's sounded similar to me but there were things that just sounded "off" iyswim. It wasn't until about a year ago when I found out how women on the spectrum present differently to men that it all just clicked. The descriptions of women with Asperger's fit me perfectly.

I did bring it up with my GP and asked about getting an assesment but my concerns were shrugged off and I was told that it wouldn't be worth it anyway. He also told me that Aspergers is "rare in females" therefore he doubted very much I really have it.

On the other hand my brother who is also very likely on the spectrum asked for an assesment (same GP) and he didn't hesitate to refer him. Maybe I'm overthinking it but I can't help thinking that gender did play a part in this, especially considering what the GP said to me about it been rare in women.

Obviously Asperger's does present differently in females which is the first barrier but I can't help but think that maybe HCP would also be less likely to suspect it in females anyway and might think it's something else.

statistically I know, hence the latter part of my post. I was giving Northern the benefit of the doubt (assuming they weren't just being goady but misinformed) and therefore trying to explain it to them. I really should just learn to let things like that lie, shouldn't I?

DD2 was flagged up by her (otherwise extremely mediocre) y1 teacher. I was oblivious as I only had DD1 for reference and she has ADHD. With a lovely specialist (appointments no longer needed but always a phone call away), and sympathetic supportive teachers, she has absolutely blossomed since her diagnosis. And got her first party invitation since Reception this week (she is nearly 8) :) :) :)

And to actually contribute to the thread, I will try and list her symptoms...
Very literal. Had to leave class in a panic when the teacher said they were going to 'go back in time' and study Victorian school. Finds it impossible to lie.
Has to say what she wants to say RIGHT NOW. Will talk over and through other people time and again. Butts in, albeit politely. Also repeats what she has just said in a whispered 'echo' and repeats what other people have said.
Very very good memory, very science orientated, loves computers/gaming, content in her own company. Excellent vocabulary. Struggles to complete work though- it's like all her ideas get jammed in the doorway trying to get out.
Will start a conversation by saying "So, Mummy, what do you want to talk about?" :o
Easy target for bullies :-/ the horrid kids round the corner tease her for loving wildlife and believing in fairies. Even when DD1 is being dreadful to her she never retaliates, even though she is very strong and would totally win.
Incredibly naive and always thinks the best of people. Distraught if told off.
I'm sure there are more, probably totally obvious ones but that's all I can think of for now.

My DD was assessed aged 6 after being referred by teacher. She was found not to be Aspergers, which I think is right, even taking into account different presentation in girls. I think she may have ADHD however, which also presents differently in girls (concentration problems, hugely over emotional), but am struggling to get a referral because she's not bouncing off the walls in stereotypical "boy" fashion.

house your DD sounds lovely.

The dawning for me that both my dc are (probably) on the spectrum came from the fact that everyone who meets them uses the same word - quirky - to describe them. Everyione.
DS has not been formally assessed - his condition is tied up with G and T which is where our focus has been with him. DH and I have been seeing a counsellor who specialises in couples/families with ASD and it is clear that DH is on the spectrum. So we are probably 4/4 in our family!

There is something about ASD and girls that breaks my heart because in my bleaker moments I think it is like an extreme version of everything that is already wrong with our world for girls. The need to fit in, the perfectionism, the judgement for being different, the eating disorders, the vulnerability to awful men, through not being able to decode social signals, the temptation to self medicate with food, alcohol or drugs.

I spent much of my 20s living in different countries and I think at some level I enjoyed having a sound cultural reason for feeling different.

I did the questionnaire online some time back and I scored as borderline. I took it to the GP and they started to process the application but in the end I withdrew the assessment request as my female GP said there is no cure and a lot of people may lose their confidence through having the assessment.

Since I am able to work quite happily alone at home and do not need it to explain to e.g. a management structure in the workplace I haven't pursued it but the research I did was most helpful. It explains certain quirks and traits in me quite well!

I just did the RAADS thing online and scored quite highly. It would explain a lot but i cba to go chasing a diagnosis that wouldnt make any difference to me in any real sense.

Im also fairly sure i have ADHD.

I just found this and read the whole thread. I was diagnosed 18 months ago with AS and ADD. I love it when people talk about it, it is so refreshing, AS can be so isolating. We did have a thread on MM SEN, and I really miss it.

i.e: the masking thing: The general population all have people who are more socially apt than others. I've been wondering if the "maskers" are not the more socially apt of the autistic community.

to the sceptics: it is very difficult to get a diagnosis of ASD as an adult female and some people have to self-diagnosed. The thing is if people have ASD, acknowledging it will considerably improve their quality of lives and that is what really matters. It doesn't mean that they go about telling the world about it, but you kind of have to say it on this thread!
Oh and also: open your mind, don't be too rigid….the world of autism is really worth knowing, it will blow your socks off!

Molly how old were you when you were diagnosed?
I have just had a diagnosis and Im feeling a bit odd about it tbh.
I started a thread about how the world doesnt give a damn about or is hostile to people on the spectrum.

Northenparent kinda sums up the knuckle dragging attitude of too many neurotypicals.

What frustrates me, as the parent of a child undiagnosed (but I'm fairly sure) is that professionals who write off my daily experience.

DD2 has just had a mini-crisis because we're visiting a friend who has a 3 year old boy. DD3 (5) is a very good artist. DD2...not so much. DD2 wanted to draw a panda for the boy, but got very upset when it didn't look like a panda.

We went on the internet to find a cartoon drawing of a panda and I printed it off. She then got upset that it didn't look like a panda. When I asked her what was wrong with it (it looked fine to me) she said 'it doesn't have the patches like a panda does.' Lo and behold, when I looked at pictures of pandas online, they have a black stripe on their body.

So...I say 'just draw the stripe on, DD2'. Cue further upset because the panda in the cartoon drawing 'clearly isn't standing on its four legs!!! How can I possibly draw the stripe on it if it isn't on four legs???'

Then she got upset because she doesn't know what he calls his panda. I said I was fairly sure he calls his panda 'Panda', but she pointed out that I didn't actually know.

She couldn't grasp my reasoning that as the boy is only just 3 years old, he'll be happy to have anything!

It may sound trivial, but most 7 year olds surely don't do this. It leads to so much stress. What was a quick picture for a lovely small boy has turned into a huge stressful exercise in panda architecture!!

I'll come back and read the rest of the thread later, but just wanted to post some links for people who want to know more about how it presents in girls. Apologies if I'm duplicating info already given.

www.aspergersyndrome.org/Articles/Asperger-Syndrome--Some-Common-Questions.aspx

www.tonyattwood.com.au/index.php?Itemid=181&id=80%3Athe-pattern-of-abilities-and-development-of-girls-with-aspergers-syndrome&option=com_content&view=article

If anyone has a serious interest in learning more, I'd highly recommend Tony Attwood's Complete Guide to Aspergers Syndrome. He talks a lot in there about how it presents differently. It was a lightbulb moment for me leading to me finally deciding to request an assessment for DD (now diagnosed with As) and for me (waiting for an assessment).

brainy I was 36 yo and found going through the diagnosis process and dealing with it difficult too.However, it was really worth it. I now feel in control and whenever I don't I take time out a soon as I can. I found that " the how of happiness" by Sonja lyubomirsky and "mindful living with asperger syndrome" by Chris Mitchell helped. The trick is to acknowledge what is upsetting you but also stay determine that the diagnosis has to be a positive thing. It is hard work but well worth it!
Where is your thread?