Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel sorry for and to want to take these cats?

24 replies

DHandhisgrossfoot · 21/10/2014 17:35

Went to the cat shelter yesterday and came back with a kitten for MIL.

There were two older cats, 12yrs + 15yrs, brought in together after their owner died. It broke my heart and if I lived alone I would have brought them straight home, but I couldn't make that decision on the spot without discussing it with DH.

AIBU to see call back in a few months and if they haven't managed to rehome them try to convince DH we absolutely need two more cats, and elderly ones at that?

Or someone please reassure me that elderly cats DO actually get rehomed. Sad

OP posts:
DHandhisgrossfoot · 21/10/2014 17:36

Forgot to mention; we have two cats already.

And I also want another kitten. Grin

OP posts:
appleharvest · 21/10/2014 17:40

They do but not often. I got my boys in similar circumstances and I'm so pleased I did as they are incredibly patient, loving cats to toddler DD and put up with all sorts of tender affections!

Aw, can't you talk to him now? My boys came home on December 1 after being in the shelter for eight months and the staff were so happy :)

DHandhisgrossfoot · 21/10/2014 17:44

I think I will try to convince speak to him about it tonight. It won't be easy, and I know my current pampered kitties will be pissed off to say the least, but I can't stop thinking about them, bereaved and stuck in a tiny little room towards the end of their lives. Sad

OP posts:
taxi4ballet · 21/10/2014 18:22

Well, we have rehomed older cats before, (the current one has been with us a few weeks) and it is rewarding, but I wouldn't think about those ones too much. They are safe and will be really well looked-after.

They may not get on with other cats and might need to be rehomed to a home without other pets. If they've never lived with other cats before, they could become really stressed and unhappy (your cats might react in the same way).

iggymama · 21/10/2014 18:39

Would the shelter still have them in a few months, or would they be pts if considered too old to rehome?

DHandhisgrossfoot · 21/10/2014 20:13

I'm not sure, they didn't mention anything about any of the cats being PTS. She did say that the longest any of them had been there before being rehomed was about 9 months.

Taxi makes a very good point, that's the sort of sensible thing I need to hear right now Grin. But still, if they are still there in a few months time I may sneak down with a cat carrier or two. Do you think they'd agree to the cats coming round for a visit? You know, just to test the dynamics between them and DCats?

OP posts:
thecatneuterer · 21/10/2014 20:28

Elderly cats do get rehomed, but not easily. However even they stand a better chance than very timid cats - they are by far the hardest - and if they happen to be black too then they've got no chance :(

Gileswithachainsaw · 21/10/2014 20:38

Aw that breaks my heartSad poor things loosing their mummy/daddy then ending up in a shelter having had a loving home before.

They won't have a clue what's going onSad

I want them

DHandhisgrossfoot · 21/10/2014 21:07

Yes it is heartbreaking, I can't even imagine how they must feel. They looked so forlorn as well. Sad

OP posts:
Flipflops7 · 21/10/2014 21:12

I know two people who successfully rehomed timid black cats! One elderly (cat not person).

catsmother · 21/10/2014 21:18

I don't think they'd be allowed round for a "visit" to see if they get on with your two as that's not the way introductions in a multi-cat household should be made. If all the cats are suddenly confronted with each other it probably won't go well and could be traumatic for them all.

IME (many years of multi-cat owning) you proceed very very slowly by confining new cats to one room for at least 7-10 days. After a couple of days swap bedding about so all the cats get a whiff of each other's scents IYWIM. Then, what I do is bring new cats down to another part of the house, e.g. lounge, but have them shut in there for a few hours, with me, so again, they get to explore a bit more and also leave their scent .... before returning them to "main" room. Then next day, introduce them somewhere else and so on and so on, obviously making sure they can't get out at this point. Personally, I've had "new" cats in the house for 10 to 14 days before letting new and "old" meet and so far, it's always seemed to have done the trick. I introduce one existing cat at a time - starting with most laid back/placid - and for short periods, always with me there too .... and again, gradually increase periods of time they spend together before separating them. When doing these introductions I also remove "new" cats (back to their main room) first because I believe psychologically this helps existing cats feel more secure, as well as new cats being reassured the place they know best is still there IYWIM. And it goes without saying that at the very first sign of anyone being stressed you separate them - there's no point in forcing the issue - you can always try again the next day.

Anyway - I've either been incredibly lucky and/or must be doing something right as all the cats I've introduced have got on well together. I currently have 4 boys for example (+ 1 girl) and was worried before about territory marking, aggression etc but honestly there's no issues at all and they often all sleep together!

Having said all that I've always been guided by what the shelter advises - there's absolutely no point trying to merge animals who've already showed signs of disliking other cats. Indeed, some cats won't even tolerate a single other animal. And of course, however careful you are, there are no guarantees ...

... but having said all that, there'd be absolutely no reason why you can't talk to the shelter about this (providing your DP is also on board of course). They'd almost certainly be delighted at your interest given how older cats are so often overlooked. Hope it all works out for you.

WitchWay · 21/10/2014 21:22

Poor old cats Sad

I took in an elderly stray who subsequently went to live with my mum, as my two wouldn't accept him Sad

Old cats are ace & don't swarm up the curtains Grin

DHandhisgrossfoot · 21/10/2014 21:22

That sounds like very good advice, thanks. One of my cats is very laid back and tolerant but the other one can be a bit scrappy and possessive.

OP posts:
appleharvest · 21/10/2014 21:24

Please take them! I acquired two black gentlemen by accident (don't ask) and so I have four, and they all hissed and tails puffed up at first.

They still sometimes yowl at each other but more often than not I find them all curled up together, I love it :)

catsmother · 21/10/2014 21:29

Awww, I've always had black cats - with the odd ginger - and it's really sad how the shelter always comments along the lines of me being "good" to take a black cat.

I think it's lovely you're considering older cats.

DHandhisgrossfoot · 21/10/2014 21:33

I never understood the black cat thing. I don't judge cats by colour, I go by temperament. The gorgeous little kitten I got MIL is black, I chose her because she was playful and sweet.

OP posts:
appleharvest · 21/10/2014 21:35

I adore black cats. Black ones with green eyes :)

SuburbanRhonda · 21/10/2014 21:39

I acquired two black gentlemen by accident

Grin
MrsBennington · 21/10/2014 22:07

just inherited two - settling in going ok.

Nohootingchickenssleeping · 21/10/2014 22:12

Take them home! I think it's ten kittens get rehomed for every cat over two years old. I have two golden oldies and they're wonderful.

WowWowSauce · 21/10/2014 22:12

I took an older gentleman in a few years ago. Sadly, I just lost him on Saturday but I wouldn't have been without him. Just be prepared for vet bills.

appleharvest · 21/10/2014 22:39

Aw, wow

Fingers crossed, my old men Wink have been fine.

Surburban dd1 has songs for the two black cats to the tune of three blind mice!

Mummys black men
Mummy's black men
Both sat on mummy's bed and were hairy and furry and blah-ah-ack did you ever see such a thing in your life as mummy's black men.

People probably think I am prostituting myself to two exceptionally hairy African gentlemen ! Grin

DHandhisgrossfoot · 21/10/2014 22:41

I'm sorry for your loss wowwow Sad. I guess that's the reason many people are reluctant to take older cats. You get attached to them, knowing they don't have long ahead of them.

OP posts:
DHandhisgrossfoot · 21/10/2014 22:42

apple Grin

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page