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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be put off using a childminder for this?

140 replies

appleharvest · 21/10/2014 17:13

I am being completely unreasonable and I suppose I'm wondering why.

Shopping around for childcare at the moment for DDs (2 and 5 months.) I need full time places for them both.

I visited a childminder who was telling me about her rule that, when out of the house, all her mindees wore a luminous vest with her childminding company name and phone number on it.

I understand why this is a good idea from a safety perspective but I hated it. It seemed too much like an orphanage or something!

I know I am BU but I hate the thought of DD1 sitting at the dentists or walking through the shopping centre or to a school with a luminous vest on saying she is looked after by someone who isn't her parent.

OP posts:
Original poster
appleharvest · 21/10/2014 17:56

Only Grin

OP posts:
5madthings · 21/10/2014 17:57

I think she sounds like she has an organised and well thought out safety policy.

I have high visibility bibs for the madthings on the school run for winter time and given madthings5 ability to disapear in the playground they are great.

I actually purposefully bought my kids bright coats etc when little for visibility/safety/ease of spotting them.

m0therofdragons · 21/10/2014 17:58

I must admit I read your thread and thought hmm that's a bit weird but then I thought about what it's like when I take my 3 dc to the park and how hard it is to keep track of them. Easier now the twins are 3 (a bit) but still hard work. Maybe high vis jackets would have been a good idea!

Iggi999 · 21/10/2014 18:02

Dh and I have no back up childcare. Have used nursery (3 years) and childminder (2 years so far). The only time back up care was requires was for a snow day in the nursery (childminder wouldn't have needed to close as nearer homes).
The back up you'll really need is for times your dc get sick.

Yackityyakyak · 21/10/2014 18:02

Apple - do you think something else has made you hesitate, and the high vis jackets are what you have focused on because you can't pin point what else it was?

My decisions about different settings were based on feelings and intuition that I couldn't actually articulate. I just knew they were right or weren't right. And the 'weren't right' could be wrong for the most trivial of reasons, but I think my subconscious grabbed hold of one more obvious thing and pointed to that.

HSMMaCM · 21/10/2014 18:06

Oh dear I have a CM car and hi viz vests. If the worst cones to the worst, it's clear they aren't my children and also clear who to phone to moan about children being out and about having fun. My own dd used to wear one when she was with me. It's not advertising for me, it's safety. The kids love them, their parents love them. No different to a school uniform really. I am of course a fabulous CM Grin. I do always say to parents to listen to their gut instinct, so if yours is telling you no, then listen.

LuckyLopez · 21/10/2014 18:09

My local nursery has been closed far more often than I have as a cm in the last 5 years.

morethanpotatoprints · 21/10/2014 18:09

Hello OP

All cms, nurseries, after school clubs and schools in our area wear his vis jackets for safety.

I think if you find a cm to be too institutionalised you won't like nurseries as these are even more so.

Why are you bothered that it looks like somebody else is looking after your child? Isn't this what cc is about? Confused

DiaDuit · 21/10/2014 18:13

It seemed too much like an orphanage or something

Yes those orphanages are famous for making the children parade around town in fluorescent vests Hmm

cerealqueen · 21/10/2014 18:15

I see - you don't want your children advertising her business? And that it highlights the business aspect rather than the home from home? See it as safety in that they are hi-vis, and she is contactable if they went missing.

Gileswithachainsaw · 21/10/2014 18:26

I think yabu.

It's a fab idea. It means at a glance she can spot where all the kids are and they have a contact number should one get lost or run off.

I've seen people stick labels on their children in busy play areas. It only takes a split second or a kid deciding to be a bugger and leg it.

happydazed · 21/10/2014 18:39

I am a cm and I have the same jackets, kids love wearing them, they call them builders jackets and pretend to be bob the builder. I am very much home from home and adore the children I mind but in a busy park it is helpful to be able to spot your children easily and if they did manage to wander off - never happened but best to be prepared I think. I have my own child and he has a jacket too, it is a big strange, kind of impersonal like giving him a number instead of a name, so I understand what you mean but it's all about safety, it would be such a shame if something the Childminder does to reassure you about safety ends up putting you off her, also as others have said she must be very happy and confident to have her business name on the jackets, shows nothing to hide.

LynetteScavo · 21/10/2014 18:40

OP, if it makes you feel any better, DH has bought visi-vests for our DC. He was just too excited when he found they made them in small sizes. Grin

I think l lot of parents like childminders to have an official car/website/etc. Different strokes for different folks.

seasavage · 21/10/2014 18:41

The car and vests being clearly marked with business names means she's keeping a careful note of her business expenses. This is an organised and professional CM IMO.

Paddingtonthebear · 21/10/2014 18:44

Child minders follow the same early years curriculum as nurseries, it's not really home from home

adsy · 21/10/2014 18:47

Paddington I think people mean that the children are in a home environment being taken on all sorts of everyday experiences as well as covering the educational aspects of the EYFS rather than the being in one room experience of nursery.
Following the EYFS does not preclude a CM from providing a secure loving home environment.

StatisticallyChallenged · 21/10/2014 18:50

I think it depends a lot on the individual childminder, why she feels it is necessary etc. DH is a CM, and he doesn't use high vis vests. But of his under 5s, 2 are still happy to be in a buggy for the school run, and the other is our own DD who walks well. The walking route is well lit and not somewhere the kids could easily run off. But he has a variation which allows up to 4 under 5s (max of 7 in total), and I could see that if he had 4 walking toddlers then high vis vests might become a very sensible option!

I don't think the vests alone would put me off - there is a fine line with childminders in that you are a home from home, but you also have to do a lot of risk assessments, health and safety etc to a degree that you wouldn't normally in your own home with your own family. I wouldn't have a "please wash your hands" sign, or a toothbrush holder which keeps each brush separate, or a fricking paper towel dispenser in my bathroom otherwise Grin

As long as it doesn't feel overly institutional otherwise, I wouldn't let it put me off.

adsy · 21/10/2014 18:54

statistically get rid of all the signs and the paper towel dispenser. Honestly, I've never bothered with crap like that and always get a "good".
It's your home, not a nursery. If you don't like it get rid no one ( including inspectors) will think any less of you.
The only sign I have up is my certificate of registration. the rest of the crap is in a folder

OddFodd · 21/10/2014 18:55

Gosh I'd be really pleased if I had a CM who was so professional

Thefishewife · 21/10/2014 18:55

Thing is op that ofsted really do like this when I was a minder I used bracelets with number on them but my friend who has just became a childminder was asked about this by ofsted they said it wasn't a requirement but she did get the feeling she would be marked up if she did this

Tinkerball · 21/10/2014 18:57

Yes, I just want the girls to go somewhere they'll feel really cared for and safe - not like a cross between advertising plaques and a scene from a workhouse!

So because you don't approve of the "image" you feel the vests give this equates to her not making her mindees feel cared for? As a wife of a male CM who is very professional and adores all his mindees I find that pretty offensive actually.

Summerisle1 · 21/10/2014 18:58

It's a shame though as they will be separated and DD1 adores DD2.

I think it's a pity that you can't get over this relatively trivial (and not at all uncommon) practice of using hi-vis vests if the alternative is using a nursery and separating your dds as a result.

If you really are looking for the best childcare for them, surely the benefit of being together has to be high up your list? Hi-vis vests seem fairly unimportant in comparison!

PercyHorse · 21/10/2014 19:01

I would be delighted with the vests. As someone has already pointed out, they would make it very easy to report her if someone saw her acting in a less than ideal way. It shows a lot of confidence to hold yourself up to public scrutiny like this.

teacherwith2kids · 21/10/2014 19:08

My cm was so wonderful that, frankly, if she had made my children dress up in panto costume and do a cheerleading performance complete with pompoms on the way to school each day I would still have used her....

StatisticallyChallenged · 21/10/2014 19:09

adsy we're in Scotland so probably slightly different, they're fanatical about all sorts of weird shit! We got inspected not that long ago and they were pretty keen to see that stuff, sadly