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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

..to think that if everyone adhered to the "48 hour rule" then everyone wins??

30 replies

lalah7 · 20/10/2014 22:10

I know this has been done before but I'm on my high horse Smile
I have kept DD1 (6) off school today as she developed d&v early hours of Sunday morning. I'll be keeping her off tomorrow as well, she hasn't been sick since Sunday evening but still has a dodgy tum.
I know it's the time of year for these lovely bugs but this is the second bout she's had in 2 months Sad. The last time both DD2 (2) and I ended up with it too.
Last time a girl was sick in class (over another girls' hair and cardy!), send home and was back the next day!! This time a boy was sick (again, in class), he told them all after that he'd been sick during the night but parents had sent him in anyway!!
It just makes me so angry! It's selfish and unfair to the sick child, the other children, the teachers and their families!!

OP posts:
LokiBear · 20/10/2014 22:11

YANBU

CocktailQueen · 20/10/2014 22:12

Yanbu. The teacher should not accept such children back in class - she should ask their parent to take them back home. Totally unfair on everyone else. Hope your dd is better soon. X

Original poster
lalah7 · 20/10/2014 22:17

I thought that too cocktail, however, it shouldn't really be up to the teacher. The parents should realise that these things spread like wildfire and stick to the guidelines.
Thanks, she's been a lot perkier since dinner (she ate about 3 mouthfuls!) and not a peep from her since she went to bed.
Fingers crossed it misses DD2 this time.

OP posts:
sunnyrosegarden · 20/10/2014 22:21

Absolutely agree. Our school would send them home again, though.

monkeymamma · 20/10/2014 22:23

Yanbu, my ds caught d&v at nursery and now dh, me (35 weeks pregnant) and my two parents (both over 70) are all suffering. Waiting to see if fil (70+) also succumbs. Not fun. And could do easily be prevented if people kept their babies at home when ill. Massive respect for my boss who actually said this morning when I callled in sick 'please don't come in tomorrow either!'

Crapbags · 20/10/2014 22:24

YDNBU

my DS has a metabolic condition that means a sickness bug can be life threatening.

He is only 1 now but I dread when he starts school for exactly this reason.

Muchtoomuchtodo · 20/10/2014 22:24

YANBU.

I brought this up with our school after a child who was sick at afternoon break on a Monday was back at school on Tuesday. I support them in their attempts to improve attendance (on the whole) but find it hard if unwell children are allowed back in the classroom.

While they agree that the rule is that the child should not return to school until 48 hours after the last episode, they explained that parents would drop their child off and then not answer their phones all day when they attempt to contact them.

waithorse · 20/10/2014 22:33

YANBU. I've seen teacher's turn pupils away at my dc school if they have known to have been ill.

Grittzio · 20/10/2014 22:34

YANBU

Having just had last week written off due to sickness bug, first DD and DS, both kept off 48 hours, then myself and husband who could not work!?! I'm then told that kids are going back before 48 rule, makes my blood boil, have complained to Head who promised to put reminder in newsletter again, he doesn't think will do any good, selfish parents will continue to send in sick kids, it's the kids I feel sorry for, if they are poorly having been sick should be tucked up at home.

Edenviolet · 20/10/2014 22:36

YANBU

Last week at dcs school a parent was reported for taking their dc in after other parents saw them being sick on way in to school yet the parents still sent them in after cleaning them up a bit!

I despair over people not keeping to the 48 hr rule. My dd2 has to be hospitalised if she get s a tummy bug (type 1 diabetes and other health issues) and over the past two weeks approx 15 of her class have had d+v. I kept her off last thu and fri despite her being well as so many in the school were sick and I was too scared to send her in.
She went today and her lovely 1:1 made sure she washed her hands thoroughly before snack time and at other points in the morning to minimise the risk.

HarrietSchulenberg · 20/10/2014 22:47

Kind of depends what caused the sickness. If it's a bug then no, YANBU, but if it's because someone had cleared 3 other children's plates of abandoned sprouts then had 3 helpings of pudding (DS2 I'm looking at you) before throwing up mid afternoon then the 48 hour rule is a pointless PITA.
But it's hard to differentiate.

greenbananas · 20/10/2014 22:53

yanbu. It's crazy for anybody who could still be a risk to others to be back at work or school.

I do understand why parents do this - they can't afford time off work, childcare is pricey and so on - but spreading infection puts us all at risk, especially those with weakened immune systems, elderly folk etc.

Muchtoomuchtodo · 20/10/2014 22:56

Yes it's hard to differentiate Harriet which is why it's a blanket ruling. There should be no need to attempt to interpret it.

AlmaMartyr · 20/10/2014 23:01

YANBU. My DCs have had 13 days off between them this half term because of a D&V bug and I know that some parents aren't sticking to the rule - "oh, but little x was only sick once so it's not a bug".

Original poster
lalah7 · 20/10/2014 23:02

It's the little ones who are sick that I feel for as well. They just want someone to give them some tlc when the feel ill. Dd's been needing a bit of extra help after going to the loo, I'd hate to think of her being in that situation at school and having no one to help her out Sad
As for the parents not answering phones, to me that's neglectful...
To those in worse situations than me (pregnancy, underlying conditions, elderly etc) I hope you all feel better soon. crapbags, hopefully the school will address this and keep a closer eye on things when your DS starts.
harriet, I'm talking about parents who know that their child definitely has a sickness bug yet sends them to school regardless (or too soon).
I'm going to have to talk to the school aren't i?
They do have a HUGE focus on attendance and I'm sure they're aware of what's going on and aren't happy about it either.
I've reiterated to DD the importance of hand washing after the toilet and before meals and I've been standing over her when washing her hands to make sure she's doing it thoroughly.

OP posts:
NameChangeAnon · 20/10/2014 23:05

On more than one occasion I've been having coffee with a friend who will suddenly say something along the lines of 'Oh I'm so tired, I was up all night with Jessica who had D&V'.

That would be little Jessica who is in my DD's class then? Great. Thanks. Again.

ElephantsNeverForgive · 20/10/2014 23:06

Yes, but schools need to may off the patronising letters, if your child takes too much time off school.

Sixth form attendance target is 95%. That allows you 3.65 days off this term. DD has had 3, 2 because of a stomach upset.

Original poster
lalah7 · 20/10/2014 23:14

Grr namechange I'd retort "oh, I'll clear my diary for next week then as no doubt I'll be busy cleaning vomit from my walls" (probably only in my head though lol!!)
DD has only been absent twice this year (so far), both with d&v. Once last year for the same reason.
Poor little thing has burst blood vessels all round her eyes from all the retching yesterday. It just makes them feel so awful and it's maddening that it could be avoided with some common sense and courtesy.

OP posts:
HarrietSchulenberg · 20/10/2014 23:15

I bitterly resented being forced to have 2 days off work, unpaid, when DS2 vomited at school purely due to over-stuffing himself at dinnertime. I also resented that he missed 2 days of education due to a blanket rule.

Sickness is not always caused by a bug and DS2 admitted that he'd felt ill within 10 minutes of finishing the last pudding (stupid little boy eating competition) which makes it fairly obvious what caused his eruption.

Handwashing has far greater impact on the spread of bugs than a 48 hour rule anyway.

26Point2Miles · 20/10/2014 23:20

They don't even have the 48 hour rule at our secondary schools

pearpotter · 20/10/2014 23:20

It's worth taking time to teach them how to wash their hands - and dry their hands properly so they don't pick up every bug under the sun.

Also sometimes the child has been genuinely ok in the morning and then becomes ill at school.

Mutley77 · 20/10/2014 23:36

Totally agree that good hygiene is more important. We manage to stop the spread of d&v bugs through our household by being careful with hygiene.

There are two main problems with the reliance on the 48 hour rule. First children spread germs before they know they are ill (or come into school before they realise they are sick), and second there are so many reasons children vomit that aren't a tummy bug. A blanket ban is ridiculous.

I have massive sympathy for those who are immune suppressed and have chronic conditions but I think keeping those children at home when something is going about is a far more sensible option as you won't be able to avoid them being exposed to germs somewhere like a school.

They don't have these rules in secondary schools and work places because older children and adults are able to manage their hygiene more effectively and don't have so much prolonged close contact!!

CaptainRex · 20/10/2014 23:50

I'm with you about the 48 hour rule and have always stuck to it,even when it was a drink too fast on a full tummy just in case.

I was furious a few years ago with one mum whose child came in having been ill in the night and proceeded to be ill again in the loos at lunch - it was only then they got sent home with their mum - a member of staff in the school!

Original poster
lalah7 · 20/10/2014 23:58

As I said, I'm talking about parents who KNOW their child has/had a tummy bug but sends them to school (or too early) regardless.
I agree about older children and adults being more savvy about hygiene. Also, you don't get more tactile than a 6 year old girl! I dread to think what germs she picks up through hand holding etc (I'm not a germaphobe before anyone suggests Smile)

OP posts:
ProudAS · 21/10/2014 06:46

I'm with you lalah7.

I'm afraid some nurseries take 48hr rule too far. Colleague's DS got excluded for being sick due to reflux despite note from Dr confirming there was no need.