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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think this is not normal (toddler sleep)

54 replies

onemiddlefinger · 19/10/2014 06:36

My DS (nearly 2) wakes up at 5 am and i'm exhausted.
He goes to bed at 8.30 and when at home has a nap during the day as well, sometimes up to 3 h as he is making up for the 5am wakings i'm sure.
But during the week at the nursery his daytime naps are usually 1h-1,5h and it makes no difference to morning wake up time.
Surely at his age he should sleep at least 10 hours? Today it was less than 9 as he fell asleep at9pm!
What am i doing wrong??? Please someone tell me there is a way to get hime to sleep longer in the mornings.

OP posts:
uptheauntie · 19/10/2014 06:38

Sounds like he might be overtired. I would try getting him to bed earlier - 7?

Bonnylassie · 19/10/2014 06:45

My toddler was similar except we also had an occasional night waking as well. We introduced a gro clock just before she turned 2, the sun comes up at 7.30 (you set it for whatever time you like, we started at 7 and gradually pushed it till 7.30). She tends to wake just before or after that time. Occasionally she will wake at 7 but we just ask her if the sun's up and remind her she needs to sleep until then and she does or will lay quietly watching the clock. Would definitely recommend one.

Daveface · 19/10/2014 06:55

Bizarrely earlier bedtimes do tend to help with early mornings.

Try and bring bedtime forward to more like 7pm ish

bronya · 19/10/2014 06:58

Earlier bedtime, shorter nap. We do 8pm to 6am (sometimes 7am) but don't let DS sleep more than two hours during the day, or he won't sleep early enough at night.

RabbitSaysWoof · 19/10/2014 07:03

Agree with earlier bed.
Also a knock on effect to a later dinner for us was that ds would sleep longer in the morning because he wasn't waking up at 7 for breakfast (changed for different reason but sleeping in later was a bonus).

wishingforwillpower · 19/10/2014 07:03

Another vote for gro clocks here - we have just introduced one to our 2 year old and it is brilliant. It has pushed getting up time back from 6am to 7am. I also agree with an earlier bedtime - we do bath at 6.45, then tv until 7.15, stories in his bedroom and then bed at 7.45. He is always asleep by 8.

HavanaSlife · 19/10/2014 07:05

Mine have all been the same, ds4 is nearly 2, goes to bed about 8.30 gets up at 5.30. Any earlier to bed and he wakes in the night or gets up before 5.

He has about half an hoir in the day, any more than that or if he naps after 12 then he qont go down till after 9.

They have all slept better once they dropped the day time nap.

onemiddlefinger · 19/10/2014 08:01

Thank you for all the suggestions, i can't really see the gro clock working but i'm willing to try anything, so will get one.
Also i have read about the earlier bedtime, and we have tried it previoulsy, it didn't work then, but maybe it will help now.
The thing is that during the week we get home after 6 so then i would struggle to get dinner ready before 7, usually it's around 7.15, then bathtime and bed, but still ends up 8.30 by the time he falls asleep.

OP posts:
Secretblackandmidnighthag · 19/10/2014 08:09

Does he not have his dinner at nursery OP?

Littlefish · 19/10/2014 08:10

Does he have lunch at nursery? If so, I would suggest a month of so of giving him an easy snack when you get home so that you can work on giving him am earlier bedtime. 7pm is too late for him to be eating a full meal. he needs to be winding down at that time.

Also, I would limit the daytime sleep to 2 hours, preferably finishing before 3.30pm.

MollyBdenum · 19/10/2014 08:10

The earlier bedtime and limiting late nap times thing sounds like a good idea if possible. You might find that as the nights get longer that he starts sleeping later in the mornings, too. But I'd also keep in mind that if you have a child under 2 who sleeps from 8.30-5 with a long nap, you are probably the envy of a significant minority of parents whose children wake up for the day at 5, but who also wake multiple times at night.

Iggly · 19/10/2014 08:11

You need to try earlier bedtimes for at least a week plus make sure he's not getting cold in the early hours of the morning. My dd wakes up with cold feet because she kicks the covers off but if she's warm she sleeps in longer.

Also don't nursery give him dinner?

thegreylady · 19/10/2014 08:13

My grandson had a version of the gro clock which had a sheep either sleeping or waking. He used to bounce in at 7 saying "Sheep's awake!" Having previously been seeking attention from 5 ish. He still wakes early but plays in his room till sheep wakes up.

uptheauntie · 19/10/2014 08:41

If his bed late time is due to getting tea ready etc, you need to start using a slow cooker or batch cooking so it's much quicker at night. Worth a shot?

redskybynight · 19/10/2014 08:49

how is he during the day? Does he seem tired (sign of overtiredness).

or maybe he is just a child that sleeps less than average?

My DS used to sleep for only 9 hours overnight when a toddler, and he only had a short nap during the day (and he was up at 5am). He is now 10 and still sleeps much less than the "norm" for his age (8 hours last night). I have come to the conclusion that his body is just wired like that

LiegeAndLief · 19/10/2014 08:55

My dc were both like this at the same age. The only thing that worked for us was dropping their nap completely. Neither of them were napping by 2yo unless they fell asleep in the car or something. They just didn't need that much sleep (sob).

Tigercake · 19/10/2014 09:06

Some children just don't need that much sleep at night. DC1 woke 6am or earlier until 8yrs old. Early bedtime/late bedtime made no difference. Nap was dropped before 3yrs old, and I would not have been able to force it to continue had I wanted to. At 9yrs old child finally sleeps past 7am.

My youngest 2yrs 3 months went to bed at 7pm last night having refused a nap. Awake 4am, yawn.

Sympathies.

RoganJosh · 19/10/2014 09:09

I would limit his nap to an hour and a half to begin with.

ThinkIveBeenHacked · 19/10/2014 09:13

Cant he have tea at Nursery, then just some.toast and milk at home when he gets in then a quick bath? Bed by half seven.

Afternoon naps - id follow what nursery do so if they do 1.5hrs at a set time id mirror that. Try and get the routines the same for nursery and non nursery days.

Gro Clock - we have one and love it. Set if for his usual wake up time for week one and loads of praise for "waiting for the sunshine to come up! Good boy!" then week two 5.15, week three 5.30 and so on.

Artandco · 19/10/2014 09:20

I would just limit nap to 90 mins and awake by 3pm.

We also get in late and like you no way could ours be in bed asleep by 7pm.

We do try and excercise them in eve also. So on eves finished early we swim 6.30-7pm. Otherwise they walk back from my office so get a good late walk. Bedtime 9 pm ish here, usually we wake them at 7.30-8am ( depending on when we need to leave). 3 hr old naps 90 mins daily still

reindeesandchristmastrees · 19/10/2014 09:21

Fairy lights on a timer worked for us as little fingers learn to re set the glo clock so it wakes up in the middle of the night. We had ours coming on for an hour or so before bed time and then we finished stories, had last cuddle when the lights went to sleep (turned off) and Kids can't get up until the fairy lights wake up (come on) in the morning. This method has worked for brilliantly for my two (Saturday and Sunday fairy lights have a lie in until 8.30). Realised ds1 could read at 4 when he found the ON button on the timer - then the timer had a Tupperware house so little fingers couldn't fiddle - with DD the timer was behind a bookcase and the fairy lights are more girly and around a mirror.

Dinosaursdontgrowontrees · 19/10/2014 09:25

My dd is the same age and if she sleeps at all in the day she is awake from 4am, no day time rest she sleeps 7 to 7. Sometimes it's a struggle to keep her awake at dinner time but it is 100% better this way.. Worth a try? You could cut the sleep down if you don't think he'll cope cutting it out completely. If dd slept for 3 hours she'd be up all night!

HamishBamish · 19/10/2014 09:35

I agree, earlier bedtime (around 7) and try to bring the nap forward and maybe reduce it a bit? From the age of 2 DS2 wouldn't sleep at night if he had ANY naps during the day. That included falling asleep in the car for 5 minutes!

We did have a similar period of very early wakings with both ours around the same age (it was awful, you have my sympathy). For us it was all about the daytime naps and it eventually resolved itself completely when we cut naps all together.

maddening · 19/10/2014 09:58

If awake 5am make the daytime nap 11am - 12 am, wake up for lunch then get out and about to wake up properly I think it is the awake time that matter - if ds naps after a certain time it pushes his bedtime back - then go up to bed at 7.30.

workingtitle · 19/10/2014 10:07

Agree with earlier bed. We get home from nursery at about 5.45 and I give DS porridge with milk and banana (make the porridge in the morning and reheat) so that's very quick to prep/eat but good sleeping food! then play for a bit and bath at 6.30 and bed at 7ish.