To think £100 pp for a wedding is ridiculous

[Kab13]

Found a great venue for our wedding, you can stay all weekend with 34 of your guests in these beautiful houses for a reasonable price.
Got a quote for the lot yesterday and it amounts to £100 pp for breakfast dinner, canapés and a couple of drinks per guest.
Someone please tell me that it's just way too much? Because I love the venue but I can not bring myself to pay £14 for "six bites" of canapés pp and £50 PLUS VAT for ICE?!
Really annoyed that such a lovely venue has ruined itself for us by insisting you use this ridiculous caterer.
And yes, that is the "cheapest" package they offer!

We have 80 people for the wedding breakfast...we could do much more sensible things with that kind of money.

That is ridiculous - the mark up on restaurant meals is an average of 70% so assuming this is much the same, they are making £7,000 profit!

Having said that if you have the money & feel it's a justified expense that you won't regret later, then by all means do it.

Just caught up with the rest of your thread. Your second idea sounds lovely .

I got married in 2002 , not in London, and the meal was £50 per head excluding drinks or canapes. So I don't think that's too bad at all.

I cant work out if that includes nights in cottage? if so, I think you've got a blinder of a deal, if its just for the day pp - then no

I loved the idea of CurlsLDN and yours OP combined!

If you do research on local food and wine/booze producers, and suggest that they can offer selected products to for any interested guests to order from for the duration, perhaps you could get the rate they charge for your wedding at a more pocket friendly level.... they may like the idea of a sales event kinda thing.

Your Plan B sounds fab, much more memorable than getting married in some fancy country house or whatever. Hog roast in the evening, what's not to like?

I got married this year and we got loads of quotes for different venues (Hampshire wedding). It was so hard to compare as they all had different add ons. We really believed it would be cheaper to do a DIY wedding (hire barn, caterers, bar etc) but all the costs soon mounted up quickly and I actually don't think it was. I think we ended up spending that much on food and drink per head when you also include all the other costs (like vat, table cloths, chair covers, set up costs). Weddings are getting more and more expensive by the minute! It's crazy.

scarlett it would cost me just over 21k for the venue hire (marquee or barn) food inc canapés and 3 course meal and pizza for the evening, to supply some alcohol (just for toasting and half a bottle of wine per guest) and hire the cottages for 3 nights. Do you think that's reasonable then?
Don't get me wrong the cottages are lovely but I would be paying 6k for those alone, they would be worth it and the venue fee would be worth it too it's the £100 pp for food and drink that gets me!

I think you need to turn the question around. Is that venue, and that food, worth that much to you for your big day?

hair nope. I've decided not to do it and go with our original plan at the Mill. We save ourselves 12.5k and I know I will have just as much fun and if rather have 12.5k that a big country estate for 3 days, especially considering I can still hire a converted barn in the new forest to sleep 38 for half the price.
I'm just surprised that some people think 21k is reasonable for venue, accommodation and food but I guess it's really all relative.
I almost had a heart attack when the quote came through :L

Good on you Kab seems to be the best venue. However, am I right in thinking that you are paying for your guests' accommodation? Is this what is expected nowadays? Glad I got married years ago!

Yes, I am paying for some guests accommodation. But they don't expect it, I've done it so I and dp can be around our closest family before and after the wedding.
I'd rather have less of a fancy dress/cake/photographer and get to spend the weekend with them.

Sorry OP, but I think you're a cheapskate.

A hotel has just started doing wedding packages and prices start at $1 million! Surely you should go for that "because you're worth it"

www.dailymail.co.uk/travel/travel_news/article-2795761/madonna-favourite-la-valencia-hotel-california-launches-1m-wedding-package.html

another trick - tell venues it is for a family reunion, do not under any circumstances mention a wedding which instantly raises the price. Still arrange all you want but keep all mention of wedding out of it.

Book a register office and you then attend the 'reunion' in a big frilly frock. Perfectly ok!

Wow I think that's very expensive.

We decided against the typical three course meal and went for a 'posh' BBQ and desert which was £20pp. Venue hire was £750 for a stunning marquee next to a beach with sea views.

Total venue for 80 people, meal, buffet in the night, venue decoration and table centres etc was about £4.5k.

Total wedding cost around £8k. I just couldn't bring myself to spend the massive amounts of money people do on weddings now. You wake up in the morning, blink, and the days over.

Is it in Somerset?

I think paella and hog roast sound fabulous! No one in the world would turn their nose up at a hog roast!

Have you looked at the Old Vicarage in Hinton? It's only got 6 rooms but maybe other people could stay close by? Or the East Close Hotel?

I'd be really careful with a hogroast, especially a 'good value' one.

I went to a wedding a couple of years ago with a 'hog roast'...where or when the hog had actually been roasted was a mystery because what I saw was just trays of greasy kebab-like meat and a withered bowl of salad. Not always what it's made out to be.

agreed with the other posters, once you put "wedding" on it, places think its a licence to print money!

good luck with what ever you do - hope you have a smashing day xx

I went to a wedding recently where the couple in question and their families had hired a group of three large luxury holiday cottages with exclusive use of the large garden the cottages were in, including a large covered area which they used for the food and drinks . Having had a cheap and cheerful registry office do elsewhere to make the marriage legal, they had their own ceremony in the garden with a fantastic view of the sea behind. They suggested to guests that they provide drinks for the reception as wedding presents and supplemented that, and some other friends with a catering company provided the food at a hefty discount. I don't know exactly what it cost for the wedding itself as the family were staying in the holiday cottages all week, but I don't think it came to more than around £3K at most, and it was an absolutely wonderful day.

My 14 c manor house was in somerset and whole wedding cost 6 k but a few years ago. Guests paid for own accommodation. The 6 k includes my dress.

I really think the wedding industry has gone out if hand. I really feel for you op. Whatever you decide you will enjoy the day x

The higher the cost of the wedding, the more likely the marriage is not to last - according to a recent newspaper report. I have long thought this!

I am another one who does not get this whole wedding industry. Thankfully I married before it took off back in 1987 and we got away up North with the whole thing for under £2K (not sure what that equates to today, but not £21K ia m sure) It was a fab day, everyone really enjoyed themselves, we had a great local hotel where everyone stayed at a half price rate negotiated by my dear Dad.

I think the wedding industry will burn itself out and we will see a return to the church hall type weddings....

It is just ONE day - how can one day ever justify £30,000 quid or whatever the modern couple spend these days.

If you added up the cost of everything (including clothes, registrar, venues, food & booze etc.) then me and my wife spent around £75 per head on our wedding (so close to £8000). Unfortunately they just cost quite a bit if you have big families or a lot of friends you want to invite.

You're not BU to be shocked at the cost (that £75 is way more than we thought we would spend when we started planning). Just make sure you shop around and always make sure you have a go at haggling the price down.

@amothersplaceisinthewrong

£2000 at 1987 prices would, I believe, be around £4,900 - £5,100 today. But that's assuming that all costs have risen at RPI, which they haven't (i.e. they've increased more than that).

I don't think most 'modern couples' do spend £30,000 (or whatever amount the Mail or Telegraph like to quote and get outraged about). The amount couples spend today might be more than people did in those rose-tinted halcyon days of yore, but that's because weddings are just expensive nowadays (for instance just a church service would cost you £500).

Even if it is in a church hall or similar venue (as ours was) it can still be incredibly pricey (corkage charges, the cost of getting even a very basic caterer in, linen hire, crockery and glassware hire...it all adds up).