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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to tell my dd not to lend kids money

20 replies

chocolatespongebob · 15/10/2014 12:52

She is 7 and year 3 at school, the school have a small charge of 50p a day where the kids are responsible for paying it.

some days my daughter spends more than 50p on her daily snack and drink.

I give her a purse at the beginning of each week with about £5 in change and have told her she can spend what she wants but when its gone its gone. If she is able to save any of her money I said I would match it and buy her something nice at the end of each term. I really want her to get into being able to save and seeing the benefits.

Kids in her class have been asking to borrow money and I think its really unfair and have told her to tell them No but dd doesn't want to upset them.

OP posts:

LadyLuck10 · 15/10/2014 12:54

Can you be sure that she's actually lending the money rather than spending it all?

skylark2 · 15/10/2014 13:04

I would give her £1 a day, not £5 for the week. I'm surprised the school haven't said something about her bringing in significantly more money than she can possibly need for a snack and drink, and they should be stamping on "lending" of money.

MammaTJ · 15/10/2014 13:04

Actually, while it may annoy you, think about how many threads there are on here about people who have lent their friends money and not had it back.

It might not be a bad lesson to learn with smaller amounts, while still young.

Fudgeface123 · 15/10/2014 13:10

Just give her 50p a day...problem solve

MarchEliza · 15/10/2014 13:20

Surely this is a bit inevitable (and I can understand why you're annoyed.) I think it will be unlikely that all 'loans' will be repaid.

If you want to give her £5 a week (I think it's brilliant way of teaching her to save btw) - can she not keep the majority of it at home and only decide in the morning how much she wants to take to school?

If others ask to borrow money she could always say that she has to bring change home?

duhgldiuhfdsli · 15/10/2014 13:25

She is 7...I give her a purse at the beginning of each week with about £5 in change

YABU.

Thebodyloveschocolateandwine · 15/10/2014 13:27

She's far too young to manage this op. Of course she is giving but away. All of mine would too.

Give her enough fur her daily needs and that's it.

Teach her money management through pocket money for home things.

She sounds a lovely girl.

5Foot5 · 15/10/2014 13:29

I agree with MarchEliza, if you want to teach her about saving money up for things then give her the money at the start of the week but tell her to keep it at home and only take in to school each day what she needs.

WerkSupp · 15/10/2014 13:29

50p a day. Sorted.

Aridane · 15/10/2014 13:30

50 pence per day should do the trick and avoid the issue. Rest can be saved at home

Gileswithachainsaw · 15/10/2014 13:33

I'd be sending her in with a snack and drink. Like hell would I send money In for something I have at home.

Either shove something in her bag or send 50 a day. Problem solved

ChasedByBees · 15/10/2014 13:39

I think that's far too much money for her to be carrying around school.

She'll look like a relative millionaire in front of her peers who may have no concept of saving and we all know how much 'sharing' is encouraged. It is going to be extremely difficult for her not to lend/give it (let's face it, she's not getting it back).

You have to help her out by not putting her in this position in the first place.

Original poster

chocolatespongebob · 15/10/2014 13:46

When I first heard the kids were responsible for it, I thought it was a great idea to teach her about money and responsibility after reading some of these replies I guess not lol

I think I probably will just be giving her 50p from now on, she doesn't get pocket money at home

OP posts:

duhgldiuhfdsli · 15/10/2014 13:48

I thought it was a great idea to teach her about money and responsibility

Why do you think secondary schools are spending large amounts of money on technology to make school meals cashless?

spindlyspindler · 15/10/2014 15:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PrivateJourney · 15/10/2014 15:47

I agree with you in theory - it's good for her to be learning to manage her money, but in practise it will be more about avoiding having it taken off her than budgeting. I do think neither a borrower or a lender be is a valuable lesson that lots of people could do with learning.

On a completely separate issue, £5 per week to spend on school snacks at 7yo seems a huge amount of money to me.

ThatBloodyWoman · 15/10/2014 15:49

I have had to tell my dd to stop borrowing money from friends.

LittleBairn · 15/10/2014 15:49

I would talk to the teacher about this it sounds like a lot of kids are taking advantage of your DD. The tuck shop needs to be better supervised.

youareallbonkers · 15/10/2014 15:56

explain to her that she is unlikely to get the money back but if she wants to risk it then it's a good lesson to learn young.

I agree it is too much money £2.50 would be more suitable then if she lends it she won't be able to buy herself anything later in the week

GahLinDah · 15/10/2014 15:56

Ours is up to 20p per day for fruit snacks starting from 5p. Dc1 has paid for her friends to have a snack at times, and they her probably, but there's never been any pressure. She often brings change home.
I'd send her with the amount per day. She is only little and sounds lovely, it's not for her to be buying snacks for everyone though.

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