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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think if your granddaughter runs up to my puppy that he might try to jump on her?

117 replies

Taz1212 · 14/10/2014 14:12

We have a 16 week old puppy. He does the school run every morning and afternoon (carried much of the way still to his great disgust Grin ). He's a lovely dog but he wants to meet everyone. Everyone is his best friend and he jumps up to greet them.

We are training him to not jump and after school we have about a dozen little girls eagerly helping. Grin He's getting better but it's going to take a while. I keep him away from people who don't approach him and tell people to ignore him. However, he's little so lots of people think it's cute. Urgh. We'll get there.

Every morning and every afternoon we see a grandmother with her granddaughter. Every morning and every afternoon she tells her granddaughter, "Stay away from that dog." Fair enough- not everyone likes dogs. Yesterday morning her granddaughter ignored her and went running up to the puppy. He tried to jump on her but didn't touch her because I have him on a short lead and I pulled him back. She started screaming blue murder - "THAT DOG NEARLY GOT MEEEEEEEE!!!!!!" The grandmother glared at me and said, "Yes, I saw that. That dog needs muzzled."

Seriously? She's seen the puppy every day. She sees how excited he gets. She tells her granddaughter to stay away- what did she think would happen?

OP posts:
FloatIsRechargedNow · 14/10/2014 19:41

I can look back at ds's life (nearly 13) almost in terms of dog moments, ours, other people's - even at the school gates - we have a framed picture of Choco, a gift from a dog owner who thought ds (age5) adorable in his attitude towards her dog as we walked to school - without our own dog. If every dog owner took their adorable pups and dogs to school, if everyone that loved dogs had dogs, if everyone had dogs - that's a lot of dogs hanging around the school gates.

Not everyone likes dogs though most do and a few are down right terrified and most of these are children that grow out of it. These dc
don't have a choice about going to school, dog owners have a choice to take their dogs, but not their dc. It's that simple....plenty of other occasions to show off your cute puppy.

Gileswithachainsaw · 14/10/2014 19:43

School run is perfect surely. There's such a small window for socialisation with puppies. If it's going to be amongst children all the time then this is how a puppy gets used to the sights and sounds of children. Op would only be unreasonable if the puppy was shy and smarmy and was growling at people or showing through body language he was uncomfortable.

She isnt however responsible for people who don't control their children. That's the parents job.

Gileswithachainsaw · 14/10/2014 19:43

Snarly that should say

hazeyjane · 14/10/2014 19:57

School gates are not the place for dogs or puppies

^^this. There are a couple of children who struggle badly with dogs at dd's school, there used to be 3 or 3 dogs, gathered around the gate, making it very hard for these children to get through the gate.

At ds's school dogs aren't allowed at the school gate at all.

FloatIsRechargedNow · 14/10/2014 19:57

Actually I think a cute puppy/dog is an almost irresistible urge to most children and I believe we are talking about a toddler who is still undergoing the "training" (which I also trained my ds in). Quite right that this 'training' is up to the parents but in this instance it was some "granny" who maybe just thought her "job" was taking her grandchildren to school, including the toddler who probably doesn't even go to school yet.

Obviously granny should have left the toddler at home until she/he was fully dog-trained so that the OP could show off how cute her puppy is and receive adoration that she might not receive if she was 'without doglet'.

Or "granny" was actually the parent - loads have 'accused' me of being ds's granny - no just older tiz all.

Now the snake on a chain....

Gileswithachainsaw · 14/10/2014 20:02

They don't have to be trained to hold hands or be on reigns though.

Given the parking and crowding that goes and obstructed roads and paths by most schools, dog or no dog those toddlers should be holding hands with their care givers.

Unfair to blame a dog owner who's not walking an aggressive fog and who's dog is on a short leash because they didn't hold the kids hand.

Seriously dogs are the least of the problems at the school gates and children should be under Control

Original poster
Taz1212 · 14/10/2014 20:07

The child isn't a toddler. She is probably in P2 or P3.

I'm not near the school gate. I'm on a grassy bit away from the path so that Noodle isn't anywhere near children who don't want to meet him.

OP posts:
HavanaSlife · 14/10/2014 20:08

Agree with giles, daft women is lucky her gd didnt run across a road to get to the puppy.

tabulahrasa · 14/10/2014 20:15

Muzzles stop dogs jumping?

(Looks at dog, looks at muzzle)...

Am I putting it on wrong?

FloatIsRechargedNow · 14/10/2014 20:31

Not sure exactly what the P-things mean (thought that was just animals and children) but assume they mean a school year not in England. So you are on a grassy knoll holding your noodles? Er Noodle I mean. Obviously not on the school-run at all. So why are you hanging around the school gates attracting attention with your cute puppy? Questions need to be asked, you are either a wierd perv or simply an attention-seeking mum on the school run, which one is it?

DanyStormborn · 14/10/2014 20:33

YANBU that silly woman us giving her grand-daughter a fear of dogs!

Passmethecrisps · 14/10/2014 20:34

I assume the OP is in Scotland which means the child is in primary 2 or 3 so 5yo at youngest to 7 oldest.

FloatIsRechargedNow · 14/10/2014 20:45

Thanks pass - I didn't want to commit a faux pas, P-levels could be in NI or Wales. I wouldn't want that to confuse the point I'm trying to make about leaving yer fecking dawg at home when you're on the school run. Only two types do it - the stupid ignorant and the look at my dog/look at me ones.

fizzymittens · 14/10/2014 20:46

Noodle rules. End of.

Passmethecrisps · 14/10/2014 20:50

Sorry float was I just being a bit daft?

Not sure if you were genuinely asking now or not.

Anyway, doesn't really matter.

FloatIsRechargedNow · 14/10/2014 21:21

No prob at all pass a rightly answered comment. Daft? Not you, the look at me look at my dog and feck u crew are. End of.

Original poster
Taz1212 · 14/10/2014 21:32
OP posts:
wafflingworrier · 14/10/2014 21:37

YABU
if your puppy jumps up at people then you shouldn't take it near small children.
the child should not have run at your dog, but the child HAS to be there, it is their SCHOOL. your dog, on the other hand, does not.

fizzymittens · 14/10/2014 21:41

What a ridiculous load of fuss. The silly child should not have lurched at the pup and the OP dealt with it all admirably. The grandmother is clearly a person who hates dogs but that is her issue.

FloatIsRechargedNow · 14/10/2014 21:44

Not at all, there are few things I despise, least of all a Bring Your Pet to School Day. Just not so keen on the I choose to bring my dog so every one else - children, mums and grandparents - suck it up Day, every day. Unless you are at Crufts, which I suspect might be where you should be.

wafflingworrier · 14/10/2014 21:54

seriously, WHAT?
"the grandmother is clearly a person who hates dogs but that is her issue"

umm, no, the grandmother is someone who is worried that a child in her care will be HURT.
which is fair enough. and it is fair enough that she expects to take her child to school without that fear and danger.
it's really NOT ok to take an untrained dog near small children. (and actually, why would you, given that, if the dog did hurt a child, they would have to be put down?)
whether or not a dog should go on a school run at all is a seperate issue, this is about an untrained puppy.

Bulbasaur · 14/10/2014 22:00

Idiotic comment in the light of the whole thread. People should train their children.

No.

Let's get one thing straight. Your dog is considered property it is not an autonomous being, when you take it out it is an extension of you. If it causes damage, it is no different than if you were to hit someone with a bike. Just as you cannot blame a bike for causing damage, you cannot blame a dog. It is on you and you alone.

Dogs are very lovely pets. I have loved all the dogs in my life to pieces. But they are not capable of complex thought or feelings. They can only behave as well as being a dog will allow them to.

With that said, if you know your dog is going to go out in public, it is your responsibility to make sure the dog is trained and able to be around people. Especially at a school gate where you know that children will be.

The problem I have with a jumping dog is that children are short. Your dog is still growing. One day, your dog will be big enough to accidentally get the face of a tiny child when he jumps or even knock one to the ground. One day his mouth will be bigger and if he plays too rough he could accidentally draw blood. Puppies do not calm down for the first 2 years. Even our intelligent well trained dog needs constant reminders not to jump or get excitable.

But more importantly, children will always always be more important than a dog. It's not up to parents to train their children (though, they should), it is the responsibility of the dog owner to keep their dog in check.

OP, you got lucky the child stopped outside the dog's leash zone. Children are unpredictable. Dogs are unpredictable. They are not a good match (to put it lightly) in a crowded area full of stimulation and distraction.

wafflingworrier · 14/10/2014 22:01

although, if you are goign to see them twice a day perhaps try compromising and talking to the grandmother and child and just explaining-maybe the grandmother got hurt by a dog when she was little, maybe she's never had a dog etc.
eg
"i am sorry he jumped up at you, he is a very young dog and he is still learning the right way to behave. i have to bring him on the school run because XYZ but it is important that you always ask a dog owner first before going near their dog, because some dogs are scared of children" "yes he is very sweet, isn't he?"
etc?

wafflingworrier · 14/10/2014 22:04

i realise my earlier comments were quite harsh, but my best friend was mauled by a dog as a child through no fault of her own and i've never owned a dog. so i would react the same as the grandmother and i'd appreciate a nice, friendly explanation rather than being ignored/stared at.

NotOneThingbutAnother · 14/10/2014 22:08

There's going to be a goat gotten on this thread as well as a dog, and a lot of dog haters. The dog is on a short lead, on the grass away from the gate. But even if it was on the other side of the road, 100 yards away, that would be your fault OP for causing "fear and danger".

I was walking my dog home on a lead when my neighbour came out of her house with her toddler, crossed the road and intercepted me. She crouched down on the pavement near my small dog, holding her child, pointed to my dog and said to her child "Don't touch that dog or he will BITE YOU!!" - Shock I was like umm - ok - sorry have I missed something? She must have been actually waiting for me to come back so she could storm out and give her toddler that life lesson. I just ignore her now.

Maybe the grandmother you came across is trying something similar, for similar but largely unknown reasons.