To have stayed in the car?

[dogscatsandbabies]

Went to sainsburys today. Got back to car and put bags in boot and kids in back. Got into front, started ignition, looked up and saw...

Car parked in front of me. 2 and a half kids alone in it. Boy in front passenger seat (about 5), baby in back (18 months max) and lad of about 7 or 8 sitting on the open rear window, legs inside, body outside. No adult in or near the car.

Oldest lad then gets out of the window, crosses the car park and heads into the shop. At this point I turn off my car, unprepared to drive off with 2 very little ones alone in the car. About 3 mins later older kid comes back out of shop alone and can't see his car. Wanders around car park for a bit (fairly carefully but still). He gets back into car through open window - impressive roof bar chin up manoeuvre!

Woman returns to car when I'd been there at least 5 mins. Small trolley with at least 4 full bags (I.e not just milk and bread quick stop). I started car and drove away.

So, was IBU not to get out of the car at any point? Should I have said something to her or judged from behind my steering wheel? I would never leave my kids in the car like that but especially not if they could be wandering through a busy car park- I wonder if she knew?

I would have watched from a distance like you did, and if the responsible adult didn't return after a short amount of time i would go to customer services and report it. Not that i agree any length of time is reasonable.

Doesn't sound like the oldest child was either old enough or responsible enough to stay with a baby.

I like to think I'd have told her what her eldest did while she was in the shop. Quite possible that she thought he was sensible enough to be left in charge while she got the shopping. I might possibly have bottled it though as I've been a knackered parent myself and know how I might react to anyone judging my parenting even in the most genuinely trying-to-be-helpful sort of way.

I'd have stayed in the car. If no one had come back within ten minutes I'd have gone into the shop and reported it to security or customer services.

I might leave my older two (6 and 7) in the car if just running in for milk but the doors would be locked and windows closed. No way would I leave a baby / toddler in the car as well. I definitely wouldn't leave them while I did a big shop.

That said, I used to stay in the car at about 8 while my mum did the shopping and it was a common sight in the mid 90s and nothing bad ever happened apart from almost running the car battery too low listening to the radio.

You did the right thing to stay and keep an eye. Not that other people should have to do her parenting for her. I think if you had said something you'd have had an earful though.

You did the right thing. I'd maybe have been tempted to google the stores number and inform them of children being left in the car had she been any longer in returning.

Perhaps there were mitigating circumstances, perhaps not. I'd hate to judge in that one small snapshot of someone's life.

i would have done the same, and like others had it been any longer I would have gone into customer services. Yet, then you would have had to leave your kids alone.

I would have done exactly as you did. Any longer and I would have reported it.

I would never ever leave children in a car alone for any length of time. The most likely time for a car to overheat and catch fire is just after the engine is switched off. My friends son died in these circumstances and could only be identified by his dental records