To have not wanted to buy BIL & SIL these tickets?

[DontTurnAround]

And now to be hacked off because none of us have tickets?

Kevin Bridges tickets went on presale this morning. DH asked if I'd be able to order them for us, no problem. He then emails me as they go on sale to say should we buy SIL & her DH and BIL tickets too for Xmas presents?

I said yes to BIL but not SIL & her H as we'd already agreed we'd buy them 40 restaurant vouchers and tickets would be 70 so almost twice what we budgeted for them. My reasoning for this is BIL is single, a student and lives at home. SIL & her H have 2 kids who we obviously buy for and as the only 2 'kids' they do get spoiled by us all. I'm of the opinion once you have kids then the focus should be on them and a 'token' present is all thats needed for the adults and DH always tells me he agrees with me then suggests things like this .

I'd already managed to secure 3 good seats for me, DH & BIL when DH started all this and asking why it was too much money on SIL but not on BIL. Didn't have time to explain and secure the tickets so I had to let them go and try for 5 tickets. All thats left is tickets in the gods and they are not tickets any of us will like so now we've got none!

So AIBU to be utterly annoyed with him? not that he knows or will care really, but for now I am seething quietly.

And AIBU to not have wanted to get them these tickets?

I think you were right about the cost of the tickets and the fact that the "main" present goes to the DC once children arrive but I don't know why you didn't just complete the purchase of the 3 tickets and then "try" to get another 2 for SIL.

Because DH wanted seats for us all together

It should of been yes I will get all or no the cost is too much so just us, once you got into individual cost and you can buy your brother but not your sister it all became too complicated and left you all without a ticket.

On this occasion I think I would have bought the tickets for everyone and just cut back what you spent on the kids. I have a set budget when it come to Xmas and that just gets divided by the number of adults and kids. It gets way to complicated if you try to budget based on who's single, who has kids etc etc.

I agree that you should have just bought the original tickets as agreed and then dealt with your husband's attempts to change the plans at a later date. However, now that it's done, why aren't you going to talk to him about how annoying it is to have someone trying to change your plans at the last minute, when you are in the middle of a time-sensitive transaction? There's no point fuming about it and being cross with him if you don't actually tell him that you would rather he stuck to the arrangements you had already made.

Also, although you don't think adults should have more than a token present once they have kids, it doesn't sound like he actually does agree with you. He might conceded the point when you discuss it, but clearly he wants to buy something more for his sister and you need to reach an agreement over this which you both feel happy sticking to to avoid this sort of situation in the future.

See I thought spending 40 quid on them and saying we'd babysit for that meal was a good compromise? Its not nothing, plus I've bought SIL a bag and scarf already and her husband will get a case of beer. It's just not as much as we will spend on BIL, but I feel for BIL he's 27 still living at home, studying and only has a part time job. He's only been able to go back to studying last year after a pretty horrific time with his Crohns involving hospital, multiple surgeries a colostomy bag and a stint in ICU.

By comparison we've already got one of the DN an Ariel princess doll and kids tablet so we've spent about 60ish on her. And I don't grudge a penny of it. Other DN is still a toddler so so far all she's got is a bear onesie(cutest thing ever!) but I would never spend less on the kids to give to the parents.

DoJo It's not worth the argument over a moot point because we've already missed the tickets, and he's happy to revert to the original plan now we can't get tickets?

Oh well if you've already started buying stuff then that's abit different nothing more annoying than someone shifting the goal posts at the last minute!

So the moral of the story is: get DH to sort out his own family and he can dick around with himself, both as dicker and dickee.

We don't buy for adults with dc, just the dc.

There's a lesson to be learned here. Do not become DH's PA! Why couldn't he sort his own family's tickets? I'd have been frustrated in your position though - cant do right for doing wrong and now you've lost out too. And DH hasn't had any of the stress or hassle!