To think other parents aren't following the rules?

[HamishBamish]

DS2 had one bout of diarrhoea at nursery this afternoon and is now not allowed back for 48h. He has had no other symptoms and appears fine.

I will be keeping him off for 48h as per the exclusion policy, but the same thing happened a week or so ago (he had no further issues then either) and a couple of weeks before that he was off with a vomiting bug.

AIBU to think that for him to be getting these bugs so frequently there must be other parents not sticking to the 48h exclusion rule? I'm fastidious about hygiene/hand washing and I know the nursery is too (as far as they can be), so where on earth is he picking these things up? DS2 is at school and although he did have the vomiting bug he hasn't had anything else.

I'm just fed up having one thing after the other (2 days is a long time to have a pre-schooler home if you're working), especially if other people aren't sticking to the rules. I work from home, so it's not as drastic as it would be if I had to be in the office, but I still have to work.

Astewart - there is a "vomit once" bug going round in many areas. In fact, there is a thread in Mumsnet about it. just because your child was only sick once does not mean that they are free of the bug.

If your child turned up at our school tomorrow, having been sick at school today, they would be turned away.

The 48 hour exclusion is there not only to make sure your child is completely well, but also to ensure that they do not spread germs around the other children.

To be considering taking her back to school tomorrow is unreasonable and quite selfish in my opinion.

Nurseries aren't medical practices and so yes there are general rules. like anti biotics means 48 hour exclusion. yes, chest and throat infections are catching. just ask the 4 staff in my workplace who came down with the same chest bug that a toddler did in the same week. if thats not catching I don't know what is! If an infection is bad enough to warrant anti biotics it is contagious. even if the infection is in your little finger.

OP I do think that your nursery rules are too harsh. There are so many children who get runny nappies from teething or from something they ate that really it should take 2 nappies before you can say it might be something more. There has to be a middle ground between nurseries protecting both staff and children from infections or illnesses and nurseries supporting parents to allow them to work realistically without demanding 48 hours non attendance every couple of weeks. If the nursery I work in applied your nursery rules we would be missing children every week and having parents feeling very unsupported.

Having said that, My work colleagues and I are akways truly amazed at how many children start anti biotics on a fri evening having had the parents insist for the whole of the orevious week that they were fine. coming in smelling of calpol (even with calpol drips on their clothes -lol) in the morning and rising temps around 3 hours after drop off. So yes, you can be sure that there are lots of parents ignoring the rules.

"bacterial infections are, by their nature, contagious."

This is an incorrect statement.

Cellulitis, pneumonia, sinusitis are not contagious. An ear infection wouldn't be contagious. A lot of infections are caused by bacteria that just live on and in our bodies.

"yes, chest and throat infections are catching. just ask the 4 staff in my workplace who came down with the same chest bug that a toddler did in the same week."

Sounds like a viral infection to me. Antibiotics would be completely useless there.

chest bug wasnt viral. doc confirmed this in all cases.

I agree with the pp who said it's probably the staff passing round bugs. I used to work in a nursery and we were told to follow the 48 hour rule but in reality we'd be disciplined and eventually sacked if we did.

If I kept DS home every time he has a slightly loose poo he would never be in!

I agree in general that too many parents are willing to send in children before they are well enough - I have a DS who is more vulnerable and so many of his a and e visits come days after parents are talking in the playground at drop off about how ill their child is - but in this case I think it's more likely a case of an unrealistic rule

but even if a child wasn't contagious a nursery isn't a nursing service. if a child needs anti biotics its a parents role to look after them when they are that ill. A nursery works on ratios of a number of children to one staff member. often a sick child, even with a non contagious illness, simply is not up to participating in nursery life but the staff aren't in a position to offer any other options. I do believe that a child just put on anti biotics does not belong in a nursery setting - it's not fair on child or on the nursery worker.

There needs to be a balance but some parents - and I am not referring to anyone on this thread - do not see this and think that nursery staff should do the same level of looking after their sick child as they do. others appreciate the support which I and my colleagues will always offer as much as we can.

Sending an ill miserable child to nursery is clearly different to sending a well child who happens to be on antibiotics.

my youngest child was ill all night last night. today I bundled him up, strapped him in the buggy, put the rain cover on it... and we took his brother to school.

I asked.. that's what they'd rather me do than have perfectly healthy eldest child off school because youngest is ill. They did say "can't someone else bring him, maybe a grandmother?" but considering it's just me (partner goes to work as we get up in the mornings) and my mother lives a 4 hour drive away, the answer is no.

I did tell friends' kids (we met near the school, it would more than double their walk to come here to collect my son so not an option) not to touch him as they usually would because I don't want them to catch it. Nothing else I could do, really.

The school always assumes we all have spare adults around to do things, but that's not the case for us.

dinosnores I totally agree that a child can appear to be well on antibiotics. however, how on earth is a nursery to know how ill a child is whilst on anti biotics unless they are in the nursery and then the staff and children are all open to coming down with the same thing. So sometimes nurseries have to have a rule that applies to everybody in order to ensure both other children and the childcare team are not left open to unnecessary chances of picking up a bug. The more it is discussed the less of a simple answer there is.

As far as I know senior school doesn't have a fixed time rule.

What I do know is they are very very keen on sending out sarcastic attendance letters.

Any parent who's child has already had time off for the usual autumn term round of virus is going think twice about 2-3 days for a miles stomach bug.

Sixform are even worse, they state they will ask questions at below 95%

That's 3.65 days this term!

And yes past experience shows they do moan per term not per year.

DD2 got two nasty things early in Y7 and got a rude letter for term one and a certificate for 100% attendance in term two, that arrived within days of each at Easter, she was not amused. She'd been to the GP for the first time in 11 years, so she was hardly malingering!

My DS 2.7 is a bit of a vommy child, and throws up when he coughs really hard, if I kept him off pre school everytime he was sick he would never go. Also he had a few runny stools, I think it was because he ate too much sugar, he kept pilfering biscuits from my tin behind my back, and kept nicking Capri Sun out of my store cupboard.

They are contagious BEFORE they are symptomatic. YABU

Ds ate just before bed on a sunday night, vomited once. Yes I sent him in as he did not have a bug, the piggy ate egg on toast for Breakfast, pasta for lunch, shepards pie and a Happy meal (silly dad got him after I told him i fed him already) just before bed. so of course he vomited.

yes I have kept him off pre school when it is quite obvious a bug, temp, serveral vomiting, lethargy etc.

Aeroflot - I said it further up the thread, but I'll repeat myself. There is a "vomit once" bug going round many areas at the moment. It is spreading so much because parents keep bringing their children back to school, where they continue to spread their germs around meaning that many other children come down with it.

Taking your child back to school so soon after they have been sick is irresponsible and selfish.

Just because a child vomits does nit mean they have a bug. Ds ate too much of course he will throw up. He coughs sometimes, so much so that he makes himself sick. At this rates he will never be in school.

Ok

I shall link to Boerhaave syndrome so that folk can see the devastating effect of vomiting that killed my very close relative

We had no idea and no doubt nor do you. A fit healthy person caught D and V and died from spontaneous rupture of the oesophagus.

Very high morbidity you see, a rare complication. Please think twice before you send your kid to school

Thanks

Nobody else in our house was sick. When dd was sick we kept her off several days, she is rarely sick so if she is, it's a bug

You is to everyone not singling out anybody btw

Ugh. It is inconsiderate and irresponsible to send children with a stomach bug to school. Not only to the other children who are exposed to a sick bug, but to their own child, who may very likely be sick at school (how horrible). To all those parents, please do fuck off.

I feel for you OP.

Aeroflot, as long as you're pleased with your gamble, that's all that matters.

It's not a gamble fgs I know my ds and he ate too much and went to bed on a full stomach, not a bug