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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think that modern life is utter shite

194 replies

OfCourse · 06/10/2014 10:53

EVERYTHING is expensive; food, cars, houses, utilities, travel for work and the service is crap.

ANY GOVERNMENT PROVIDED SERVICE IS FUCKED; education, NHS, social welfare, police.

None of the above are in any particular order. Is it me? Am I just having a bad day?

SELL ME MODERN LIFE

OP posts:
Mumzy · 07/10/2014 09:29

The one aspect of modern life which for many is rubbish is the cost of housing. Many families earning decent wages are living in expensive insecure housing and it really does take the shine of your everyday life. It also affects long term plans including when you can retire.

Housing costs was one of the reasons for students in Hong Kong taking to the streets and demonstrating last week. Many felt housing was totally controlled and manipulated by the Chinese government who have used Hong Kong property to shelter their ill gotten gains, reward their cronies and buy off the banks. Many graduate Hong Kongers no longer believe they will ever be able to buy their own property and subsequently will have less control over their lives. I think we will see similar demonstrations in the UK if housing costs continue to rise at the current rate.

ClapHandsIfYouBelieveInFatties · 07/10/2014 09:47

Mumzy yes. Nail on the head. It's a real problem and I foresee a big change in that many families will be forced to live together...children I mean...will stay at home for longer. My sister and my Aunt both have adult children at home with them. My sister has her DD who is 25 and contributes to the mortgage and my Aunt the same except she has three girls over 25 at home.

It will go on and on.

devoncreamtea · 07/10/2014 10:25

I think, while gratitude for the services we do have in the UK is definitely merited - huge NHS fan, would hate to see it scrapped - I also think that there is a lot to be improved.

The culture has become more and more grabby, blame-y, judgey...
Education is widely accepted as a bit shite, but we are unable to make changes
The wealth belonging to the few just persists
Politics is a load of rubbish, no one making a decent stand for a society that is actually sustainable in anyway, priority continues to be profit, human rights fade into background and our foreign policy is insane.

We have the resources to build a strong society, where we can achieve a good standard of living for our citizens as well as provide aid and research that could benefit other countries. The fact that we don't do this is the biggest mistake of modern life.

hagarthorne · 07/10/2014 11:17

You just don't know how most of the world live.

I love having an NHS. Schools are free. You can drink the water in the taps. Bribery is hardly known as a means of communication. The roads are maintained. None of us are saving up from transport via container lorry to get our kids a better life.

Bumpsadaisie · 07/10/2014 13:37

Nor do we fear the knock of the secret police in the middle of the night.

Modern life is great - we are very blessed indeed.

queensansastark · 07/10/2014 14:12

If you think modern life is bad, I challenge anyone to find modern life in any other country which is better.

queensansastark · 07/10/2014 14:13

Or even at any other time in history.

LarrytheCucumber · 07/10/2014 14:17

We also don't have to go to the edge of the village at night to go to the loo in a field, living in fear of being raped while you do it.
There are so many places in the world where life is short and generally unpleasant.

elQuintoConyo · 07/10/2014 14:32

In Spain you recieve dole at 70% of your last wage for either 18 months, or until it runs out.

Once it runs out, you have no more access to free healthcare, your unemployed status will flag up once you are asked for details, and you will be charged for the treatment you receive. Except in Catalonia. Thank fuck I live in Catalonia.

If you don't like the system, fight the system.

But it's fine to have a big old rant if you're fed up Thanks

jellyandbeans · 07/10/2014 14:37

Hi, I have what I call 'first world problems' ( thanks to Jason Manford who started me on that saying!) I do get tired of busy roads ( I live in Essex and the roads are really getting so congested everywhere) going into shops and not being able to find an assistant, self service tills ( because the local store doesn't have people on the tills at 9.30am it seems) how, when I want to look at something on the shelf, at least 3 people seem to hovering around in front of me, having to wait ages to get served. Crap food in restaurants, be they chain ones or a bit more pricy, they all seem bland and service is hit and miss. However, I then take a breath and count all my blessings, all the things people have said above. A home, happy sons, a husband with a job, indoor plumbing the list is endless. yes, everything is expensive in this country, the NHS isn't great, but we have a lot more than a lot of other countries.

gypsygirlfromlondon · 07/10/2014 14:47

I agree with Mumzy. I think renting too is becoming such huge problem. Not only is the tax payer increasing the wealth of private landlords directly by paying off their mortgages with HB but BTL landlords are given tax breaks and encouraged to increase their 'property portfolios'.

It's a national disgrace the those on average middle to low incomes cannot afford a decent home. Where's the point in working just to give all your money to a greedy landlord? So depressing as you can't even save with rents being as high as they are.

My sister is a wealthy woman with a very large detached 5 bedroomed modern house in the home counties and all 3 of her children are private education. She has just become a BTL landlord for the 3rd time. I am dismayed that the county allows people to own multiple properties and exploit those who cant get on the property ladder. We urgently need BTL regulation and that wont come anytime soon. The current system allows for huge disparity in living standards and serves the very rich while those hardworking families on good incomes cannot invest in their and their children's future.

Having said that, at least we don't have people starving on the streets and when I look at how hard and difficult things were for our ancestors, I'm so thankful I live now.

Anaesthetics- thank goodness for anaesthetics !! All those thousands and thousands of lives saved and unbearable pain relieved. Thank you William Morton and all who pioneered pain relief.

I couldn't care how crap life is as long we have pain killers, heating, electrcity, antibiotics and fresh water, all else is just extra.

As my old landlady from years ago told me; "if you have a roof over your head, clothes on your back and food in your stomach, you're rich" Because once you have the basics you can progress. Without those you are fighting for pure survival.

Worksallhours · 07/10/2014 15:32

YANBU, but then, apart from a few spots in history, life has always been shite for most ordinary people in one way or another.

We have just swapped one set of circumstances for another. 100 years ago, a working woman wouldn't have needed a car; she would have walked to work because work would have been in a nearby factory or mill or shop.

And yes, people had outside toilets but, as my 87-year-old grandmother pointed out a few months ago, that meant you didn't have a bathroom to clean. :o

It's swings and roundabouts. Modern white goods were great in terms of freeing women from the physical labour of domestic chores, but they also had certain cultural implications that led to an increase in work at the same time. It became culturally unacceptable to wear a shirt for a week and just change the collar and cuffs. It became viable to purchase fashionable clothes made of fabrics that didn't have to "wear" well and do without washing over a period of time, so we ended up with twice as much washing.

And yes, we now have central heating, a godsend, but that also means that it has become viable for adults and tweens/teens to occupy different rooms for a large part of their home life, which has implications for women in terms of family dynamics, how the house runs and the amount of domestic work that then needs doing.

Again, we have incredible access to education these days and young people can stay on until 18, but, working in HE, sometimes I am not too sure whether we haven't just stretched the acquisition of relatively basic skills and knowledge to take place over 18 years+ rather than 14 or less.

The only thing I would say is that, in historical terms, food is pretty cheap today: poultry, in particular.

And I do have to add ... I get a bit irritated by the "first world problems" meme as it seems to reflect an exceptionalist attitude that strikes me as being naive.

Put simply, in terms of standard of living, I would not say that Western countries are at the top of the tree at all, with the exception of Switzerland. I have lived and worked in non-western countries, and the typical middle class standard of living for citizens in some Middle Eastern and Asian countries can be astonishing -- and I am not talking about the elites here at all, I am talking civil servants, teachers, nurses, policemen, small business owners etc.

It is also worth remembering that the Ugandan Asians who came to Britain after Amin threw them out in the 70s were shocked by the living standards of the English. They just could not believe such poverty existed in the homeland of the British empire amongst white people.

IdealistAndProudOfIt · 07/10/2014 15:46

Interesting thread. I like my kettle, hot water, heating (spot a theme here?) and yes, education and modern medicine. As I'm now living in Belgium which has great medical care but an unbelievably inefficient health admin scheme I can definitely appreciate the efficiency - yes it is - of the nhs and indeed whole british public sector.

But you are not being unreasonable, so much else that you mention is not good and getting worse. Getting worse is the key. Inequality is on the rise, I read somewhere that income inequality is as bad as it was at the turn of 19/ 20 centuries, the situation with housing is ridiculous, British culture is very aggressive and frequently violent compared to european cultures, also very sexist.

Things could be worse, yes. We could be in the third world. Is that any reason to accept the decline and stop trying to make things better for all of us, not just the rich?

Thebodyloveschocolateandwine · 07/10/2014 15:49

Half the women posting here would have died in pregnancy or labour back in the past.

Many of our children wouldn't be here too.

Sold to me.

netty7070 · 07/10/2014 15:59

My granny was married to a drunk, lived in dire poverty, had 7 children one of whom was blind, deaf and quadraplegic. She cared for him f/t as well as coping with everything else. There was no alternative other than a 'home'. She died at 58 and looked 75.

I teach history and have absolutely NO illusions about the past.

hollowhallows · 07/10/2014 16:04

Its not modern life, its life in the UK. Yes it is better than some places, but when compared to other European countries, not so great. I'm thinking of emigrating and know a lot of people who have already left for better prospects and quality of life.

JerseySpud · 07/10/2014 16:13

Hmm its a hard one. I can see where the OP is coming from with this.

Its not so much the amenities and the technology but look at it this way

Yes the internet is wonderful and we can connect with people all over the world, but also look at the new dangers it had brought.

Yes the NHS is a wonderful idea but look how underfunded it is, how understaffed and over subscribed.

Yes all these moden techologies are wonderful but they are expensive yet expected.

And i think its also the attitude to life now. Sadly the attitude now is what can you do for me, rather than what can i do for myself.

AnyoneForTARDIS · 07/10/2014 16:55

Having said that, at least we don't have people starving on the streets

the homeless, the cardboard box dwellers, the beggars on the street...and that's just London.

and all the rich bankers and business men and politicians walking past them every day and doing nothing about it.

AnyoneForTARDIS · 07/10/2014 16:55

agree with jersey.

PhallicGiraffe · 07/10/2014 18:17

Try living in Sierra leonine and see how long you can survive Ebola, you moaning carnt

Bouttimeforwine · 07/10/2014 18:28

Modern life is great. Much better than in the past. But I think it is the comparison to other people that makes you think that it sucks.

Psychologically i think there is more pressure nowadays. Actual physical life and provided services, are great.

nomorecrumbs · 07/10/2014 18:32

Those with too much time on their hands will always find something to moan about.

BeCool · 07/10/2014 18:35

Washing Machines.
Smile

chockbic · 07/10/2014 18:38

We are probably more pampered now but that is a good thing.

If it feels too comfortable, go slum it in a field for a while.

AnyoneForTARDIS · 07/10/2014 18:45

agree with worksallhours too.

if modern life is supposed to be easier-labour saving devices etc etc then why is everyone so stressed all the time then?

trying to keep up with the Joneses?

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