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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think - if I had the money I'd take dd and book a Travelodge so we can get some rest (cat related)

118 replies

catsbabyandchaos · 05/10/2014 18:07

I have 2 cats and live in a second floor flat.

2 weeks ago one cat jumped out of the window (Hmm) and for two nights kept me and probably everyone else in the flats awake yowling to come in. Except when I went out to try and get her back she ran off.

She has now done the same thing.

I was out there at fucking 4 in the morning sorry for language shaking whiskas kibbles to entice her. She knows it's my window as she howls outside it and I mean proper yowling that wakes you up but when I try to get her back just runs off.

I'm crying my eyes out I can't do another night like last night, I'm at work in the morning and have to be up at 6.

What the hell do I do ?

OP posts:
Littlef00t · 05/10/2014 20:21

Unfortunately I think you need ear plugs and put food out. A mesh on the window to stop cat getting out sounds good.

QueenChrysalis · 05/10/2014 20:27

If it's a really nuisance to the neighbours and your cat is very distressed then perhaps the RSPCA could help or at least have some advice. The neighbours may complain anyway and the neighbourhood police may ask for assistance to catch her to stop the disturbance. Or ask friends or neighbours to help, I'd definitely help if a neighbour or friend needed it for this reason.

If you don't have luck tonight then leaving the doors open slightly with treats may entice her back in the morning. Good luck.

Original poster
catsbabyandchaos · 05/10/2014 20:27

Seriously, I don't think I will get her in, it feels like cathys ghost outside Wuthering heights screeching and wailing let me in. But when I go outside nothing there. I haven't got any ear plugs and I have a baby.

OP posts:
Original poster
catsbabyandchaos · 05/10/2014 20:28

I can't possibly leave doors open, it's a block of flats, I can't let anyone walk in to someone's flat.

I wish one of us would drop down dead, preferably me.

OP posts:
Booboostoo · 05/10/2014 21:04

Put some mesh on the window and get a cat trap from the CPL. Don't make a mountain out of a molehill, it's the lack of sleep that's stressing you out.

JubJubBirds · 05/10/2014 21:37

Mrs am I missing something about gumtree? In a desperate situation I don't think it's a problem. When my friend got his cat through it he was the 3rd person the owner had seen, she'd turned down the previous 2 due to their unsuitability (the first because they already had other cats and this cat want good with others and the second because they lived on a busy road). You do have the right to do that.

Additionally it was good from my friends pov as he was still rescuing a cat rather than going through a breeder and he got the cats documents (date of last worming etc) plus letter from the vets confirming it had just had a check up so he felt comfortable about the whole situation.

Its obviously not as good as going down the shelter route but OP had already said the shelters were full (this was also before I knew she didn't want to give them up) and IME if you use it sensibly it can be fine.

Have you had a bad experience with it?

landrover · 05/10/2014 21:56

Take the bloody cat and have it PTS! FGS its making you and your neighbours lives a misery!

dancingwithmyselfandthecat · 05/10/2014 22:05

My goodness that's a nasty post landrover

Bailey101 · 05/10/2014 22:08

Landrover, that was vicious! Why would you say something vile like that?

londonrach · 05/10/2014 22:13

No suggestions op but try and get some sleep. You may hate me for this buts its only a cat, your health and the baby is more important. No healthy cat will stave you given her to option (like others i suspect cat has meet another neighbour or dog who frightened her). Close the window. Leave water and food out and try and sleep. With sleep you feel better. I know you dont want to rehome but the cat isnt happy and making your life and your neighbours miserable. Surely it better the cat is happy. If you love something you have to let it go...if it goes it wasnt yours, if it comes back to you its yours for life. Just get some sleep for now op xxx

landrover · 05/10/2014 22:17

Sorry, may have been a touch harsh, but I can imagine being one of the neighbours!

landrover · 05/10/2014 22:18

I didn't really mean PTS !!! But goodness, you have to sort it! x

landrover · 05/10/2014 22:21

I was being a bit flippant, sorry!!!

Leveret · 05/10/2014 22:22

Can you catch her by teasing her with a piece of string, or elastic with a toy on it? When mine wouldn't come to me I could sometimes get them to forget and come close enough for me to grab them when they were playing chase.

xyz1000 · 05/10/2014 22:44

I wouldn't worry too much about your neighbours. We have had a neighbours dog howling since last weekend. Driving me nuts but what can you do ?
I think try and a tease it will a toy on some string like Levervete said .
So are you going to keep them inside if there is no way for them to get in (once he is back inside )?

withdrawalhell · 05/10/2014 22:55

For the future. .have you tried feliway plug in? I have got a timid anxious cat and its brilliant. Also 5 different vets said to use ffeliway when you move house or have a new baby.

Check it out. .best thing ever

Bailey101 · 05/10/2014 23:11

I second the feliway plug ins - worked wonders when I introduced my 2 cats and my vet recommends them for behavioural issues as well.

ProfessorVonIgelfeld · 06/10/2014 00:02

JubJubBirds

The reason I wouldn't consider advertising an animal on Gumtree is that you have no real idea who you are handing an animal over to. People can appear to be very nice and normal, but might actually be wanting the animal to use as bait in dog-fighting, or for some other cruel practice.

I'm sure there are perfectly nice people who rehome animals advertised on Gumtree, but you just couldn't be sure that the person who took your animals was absolutely legitimate and above board.

MidniteScribbler · 06/10/2014 00:25

Probably best to try in daylight hours when the cat is less skittish.

But please do go to the neighbours and talk to them. If you aren't sleeping, then they aren't either, and people tend to be a bit kinder if they know you are actually doing something about the problem rather than ignoring it.

Whippet81 · 06/10/2014 00:52

Ask the CPL if you can borrow a trap tomorrow.

Sort one problem at a time. Catch her first and make sure she can't get out again (put net in the window so air can come in but she can't get out).

Have a serious think about what to do.

Life is too short for both you or the cats to be that miserable. How old are they? Could they be rehomed to a yard or a farm as rat catchers? Most of the yards I have been on have had cats and they aren't just wild they are normally fed by lots of soft women and have somewhere warm to sleep. There are some cats who much prefer this lifestyle.

I know the post shouting PTS was mean but you know there are a lot worse things that can happen to an animal - I say this as someone who much prefers animals to people. It's not the easy way out - sometimes it's a brave decision - much more responsible than Gumtree (sale of animals should be banned from these horrid sites).

You can't leave her - you had her and you're responsible - I have spent many days and nights with sick animals and had a full time job and all other responsibilities. It's part of life if you have animals.

JubJubBirds · 06/10/2014 07:37

Whippet you'd rather have an animal put to sleep then put them up for rehoming on gumtree?! Wow.

Professor I completely agree with you, a shelter should be the first call in a rehoming situation as they can carry out home visits and know what to look for in prospective adopters. (That being said when we go our dog from Battersea all we had was a very brief chat with one of the workers before we were allowed to leave with a pet.)

I just want to say again in case anyone gets the wrong impression after the amount I've been going on about gumtree; I absolutely only suggested it because OP sounded in a desperate situation and said the shelters were full.

Original poster
catsbabyandchaos · 06/10/2014 08:08

I genuinely don't understand why rehoming is being presented as the solution to all solutions - have people missed the fact the issue is I can't get hold of her? She is yowling because she's outside and wants, I presume, to be in. But she's yowling outside my bedroom window which is at the side of the flats and is I presume where she exited.

The door to get in is at the front and she won't go round to the front. I doubt a neighbour has scared her, it'll be the traffic she's scared of.

Seriously, how the actual F is 'rehome' a solution to a cat that won't come in but is noisy when out? Confused

Landrover there are 3 flats round this side, where she's yowling. So we will be the only ones being disturbed and I think the person on the 3rd floor is far enough away. It's noisy anyway with the road and the railway line.

Oh and one more thing for the REHOME cheerleaders, I'm not going to be here much longer, it was very much a temporary stop-gap.

I was getting pretty desperate last night and I had a disturbed nights sleep; I kept thinking I could hear her yowling but sometimes I think I was dreaming, she definitely did yowl a few times and I had to throw water at her which I didn't like doing but as people have said I do have to think of neighbours. It's raining here now too Sad

Really, it's just one more thing that's adding to stress and upset at the moment, I think it's me, not the cats, who need a plug in diffuser.

OP posts:
Gileswithachainsaw · 06/10/2014 09:26

I just want to sayagainin case anyone gets the wrong impression after the amount I've been going on about gumtree; I absolutely only suggested it because OP sounded in a desperate situation and said the shelters were full

Gum tree never is and never should be an option. Ever.

I actually believe being pts would be a better option than the risk of who could get a cat on Gumtree.

And no one needs to go anywhere anyway. She just needed to get the cat Inside.
op I hope you can catch your cat soon. Thanks

JubJubBirds · 06/10/2014 10:09

I think it's absolutely disgusting that you would rather a cat be needlessly killed. You honestly sicken me.

Gileswithachainsaw · 06/10/2014 10:12

Cos a life with idiots getting pets off gumtree is soooo much better Hmm