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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

How much compensation is reasonable

24 replies

milnes · 03/10/2014 21:54

Family Services admit that an assessment of your family was highly inaccurate and false and that this lead to the wrong decision to start legal proceedings and keep your child in care for six months. (During which time you only saw your child 3hrs per week under supervision and had to fight to disprove the inaccuracies.)

Family Services say sorry and wish to compensate you a reasonable and fair amount of money. How much is reasonable and fair?

-false/exaggerated accusations that were distressing and took months to disprove.
-separated unnesasary for six months plus
-child now has emotional issues
-uncertainty whether you would get your child back or child would be adopted out.

two year complaints process where you and to fight at several stages until the truth came out.

OP posts:

hippo123 · 03/10/2014 21:59

I would just want any solicitor fees paid back. Most important to me would be they have acknowledged they made mistakes and have put procedures in place to prevent it from happening again. I'm not sure any amount of money would make it ok. I would rather that money went into prevention.

KingJoffreysBloodshotEye · 03/10/2014 21:59

You can't compensate for that.

No amount of money could make up for only seeing my child for 3 hours a week.

londonrach · 03/10/2014 22:00

Solicitor fees..

MisForMumNotMaid · 03/10/2014 22:01

What financially would create some much needed stability for you? What amount would pay off your mortgage/ put a decent deposit down on a property for you/ provide a fund for your DC for Uni?

Plus sufficient to pay for several years therapy if its not available on NHS.

What a horrible thing to have gone through. It makes me want to just snuggle my DC back under their covers and kiss their heads. No one can give you back that time or remove that trauma. The best money can do for you is provide a stable base for life to move forwards from.

I guess you're getting proper legal advise though?

PiperIsOrange · 03/10/2014 22:02

Solicitors fees and fees to pay for private counselling.

Also enough to take the DC on a once in a life time holiday.

Mumoftwoyoungkids · 03/10/2014 22:08

Can you get an assessment as to how much private therapy could be needed for the dc? (Someone on another thread said they were paying £180 p.h so even if dc only needed 6 months worth - which isn't that long in therapy terms - you are taking about £5k.)

Solicitors fees.

Any other costs eg time off work?

Original poster

milnes · 03/10/2014 22:29

Thanks guys. No money can make up..but yes..we do need stability in our lives after all of that and money would help with therapy and ensuring my child has something for the future.

OP posts:

Eva50 · 03/10/2014 22:29

Enough that you are able to work less hours in order to spend more time supporting dc's at home if they need it. What a terrible thing to happen. No amount of money can really compensate.

greenfolder · 03/10/2014 22:34

i think you need professional advice with regard to damages. Are they offering compensation for the child? If so, you really should take some proper advice. I think you would start by writing up your expenses now and in the future and maybe have a proper report from the medical profession with regard to the impact on your mental health.

But it is one of those situations where money is all that can be offered and that is no compensation at all.

Original poster

milnes · 03/10/2014 22:42

The stress resulted in adrenal failure (I no longer produce stress hormone-cortisol).. and cannot work at all. I go to hospital almost once a week and need a £3000 hydrocortisone infusion pump and £2000 a year medical supplies for rest of my life..which are only available in USA at the moment. NHS don't have them.

I am having counselling for the situation. £100 per fortnight.

As for my daughter she suffers anxiety and needs counselling...in progress.

I was a teacher..now i cannot work. We are living on a sickness benefit and in a council house which is a blessing to us..but i can't give my child the life i planned to when she was born.

I am pleased to have a document accepting these things were wrong and an apology but they are offering compensation, i never asked for it.

OP posts:

LaurieFairyCake · 03/10/2014 22:48

You need to get someone to assess this if you can't work and have ongoing expensive medical needs - you'd need millions if you can't work!

maddening · 03/10/2014 23:34

I would take them to the cleaners - what you and your dd have suffered is abhorrent.

Babycino81 · 03/10/2014 23:35

Research the cost of a private therapist suitable for your child and get them assessed. Claim for your fees and any likely costs that will be incurred

Jux · 03/10/2014 23:45

Get professional advice. No money will make up for it, but it can help to ameliorate the effects; it would be a seriously massive amount if you were compensated for never being able to work again in your chosen profession.

rockybalboa · 04/10/2014 00:15

My mum doesn't produce adrenalin because of a condition she has. Taking hydrocortisone sorts it. How come you need treatment only available in the US? That can't be right.

In terms of how much, the statutory bereavement payment in the UK is just under £13000. So for the emotional upset bit (ie the non-quantifiable part) I would keep your expectations very low. For the past and future losses you can quantify such as counselling, loss of earnings etc then the amount you would expect depends on the amount of the loss. I agree you need a lawyer.

tiredgranny · 04/10/2014 00:21

I would also want the social worker involved to be struck of register and the chair of the panel to be sacked. money will not make up for what u have been through and would take them to the cleaners.

drbonnieblossman · 04/10/2014 00:34

At first glance, I was going to say you should claim for out of pocket expenses I.e legal/counselling etc. then you went on to explain the effect on your health and its knock-on effect on your financial situation which could potentially be very long-term.

On the one hand, no amount of money will buy you back that lost time with your child.

On the other hand, we hear of so many tragic situations where due to many circumstances a child slips through the net. ( though of course I'm not suggesting situations like yours exist as a leveller - what you have all been through must be simply devastating).

Wishing you and your family a secure, bright and happy future. You can't erase what you've been through but you can look forward.

On the third hand, this is about your family - they're offering, you need to get as much as you realistically need, taking into account your ill-health, your previous position, your ideal for your child's upbringing, educational security (not necessarily a private education but something that will enhance certainly), counselling.

PiperIsOrange · 04/10/2014 00:35

Go to a proper solicitor though, not the no win no fee ones.

Jill2015 · 04/10/2014 00:47

My sympathies for what you have been through, I suggest taking professional advice in terms if compensation.

guineapig1 · 04/10/2014 00:53

Another one agreeing that no sum of money can make up for this but that you should definitely consult a Solicitor who can help you quantify damages or compensation. Sadly there will probably be case law creating precedents i.e. The courts will have looked at this before and perhaps set guidelines for calculating compensation which your solicitor can advise you on and use as a starting point. The other thing about having a solicitor is that they will be able to advise you objectively and if necessary negotiate on your behalf without the ( entirely understandable ) emotions you will be feeling.

steff13 · 04/10/2014 02:39

I would take them to the cleaners - what you and your dd have suffered is abhorrent.

^^THIS. I'm not a particularly litigious person, but if this happened to me, I'd be out for blood. I'd want whoever did the assessment fired, and I'd want A LOT of compensation. You don't take someone's kids away for no reason. The emotional damage to your daughter is probably incalculable. Here in America, millions of dollars would not be out of the question as far as a settlement goes. I'd ask for as much as your lawyer thinks you can get.

snapple · 04/10/2014 02:56

I am so sorry to hear this happened.

How unfair and awful.

If you can get the right advice then I hope you can use some money as some sort of cushion to help with the future.

HungryHorace · 04/10/2014 03:42

Piper, no win no fee lawyers are proper lawyers. Just as qualified and experienced as those who don't offer that funding arrangement.

As the OP isn't working, she may not be able to afford to pay £150 an hour, plus costs, to a solicitor. And with Legal Aid cuts as well, a conditional fee agreement may be the only way the OP can access legal assistance.

I agree that you really should get some legal advice. If you call the Law Society they can advise you of firms who do the kind of work you need. It is more important to get an experienced solicitor than it is to avoid a conditional fee agreement.

Wisheswerehorses · 04/10/2014 08:50

At the very least they need to restore you to your position prior to this. I think you will find that legal services will be willing to take their bill when you receive the compensation, and will add it in as part of the costs due. It's not being contested, it's purely the amount to be decided.
They cannot undo the emotional impact, but you should not be left financially worse off because of their mistakes. I am so sorry that you have been through this. I cannot imagine how painful this was for you and your family.

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