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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To put dd back in nappies

26 replies

Allisgood1 · 03/10/2014 08:45

I give up.

Dd2, who is 3 next month is having major poo regression. She was completely toilet trained until DS arrived 5 weeks ago. Initially wees and poos were all in her pants, now I am cleaning shit up. Yesterday 5 times she pooed herself. I've tried everything. Ignoring, time out, praise. It's not working. I'm maybe resorting back to pull ups today as I just cannot clean up more shit all day today.

OP posts:

Mrsjayy · 03/10/2014 08:59

5 poos is a lot are you sure she isn't ill or allergic/intolerant to something ? I would out her in pull ups till you get her back on track , one of ,mine was a poo with holder and would only poo in her night nappy that was the last nappy to go

Nanny0gg · 03/10/2014 09:01

Reward chart?

Constant asking and taking her to the toilet with loads of praise? (I know that's difficult with a newborn).

Isn't 5 times a day a lot of poo?

Does she go to nursery/playgroup? How is she there?

It's obviously jealousy, so I don't know if putting her back in pull-ups is a good idea or not, but I wouldn't have thought so...

Original poster

Allisgood1 · 03/10/2014 09:02

Each time she went was a small amount. If she had done it all together it would have just been a big poo.

Worried pull ups will reinforce the regression. I did put one on yesterday and she went and did a wee on the toilet twice, then a poo (in the pull up). Anyway, I hope wees don't regress now too.

OP posts:

Original poster

Allisgood1 · 03/10/2014 09:03

I do ask several times a day and she says no. Then goes anyway and comes and tells me

Fine at nursery but only there two mornings. No poo there at all yet.

OP posts:

Mrsjayy · 03/10/2014 09:07

Right what you could try is getting her to help clean herself up get her to wipe her bottom while you sort out the dirty pants and dont mention that you think its wrong dont say oj dd mummy asked if you were need ing, it might be an attention thing because of the baby

Mrsjayy · 03/10/2014 09:08

5 poos is a lot to squueze out,

Elisheva · 03/10/2014 09:41

I would put her back in pull ups for a couple of weeks and then make no mention of poos or toilets or nappies until it becomes a non-issue. It's a bit of a pain for you but puts you back in control of the situation and takes away its 'power'.
And 2 weeks in pull ups is not going to have make much difference in the long term.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 03/10/2014 09:50

I think I would pop her in nappies. She's obviously having real problems and you don't need the extra work with a newborn as well. My DD would climb in the baby's car seat and Moses basket when I had DS (she was 2 at the time). I think it's fairly usually for the older child to start behaving like a baby again as they think it will get your attention / want to be your baby again so that is probably what's happening. DD may decide she wants to back in pant on her own but for now I would go back to nappies. She's not even 3 so not that unusual to be in a nappies.

londonrach · 03/10/2014 09:53

Pop her back in. Make no issue about it. Get get her involved in the care of your ds like bringing the wipes, handing the nappy over. Something small. Make fuss of her being grown up being able to help. In a few weeks time if at home all day maybe try again. She only 3 and her little world has been shaken but the newborn. Lots of hugs. And congratulations on your ds. X

DeadCert · 03/10/2014 09:53

Totally normal to regress with a newborn. DS (3) did baby talk when DD arrived 10 weeks ago, he's just coming out of it. Do whatever you need to to make life easier for you but I wouldn't make a big deal out of it and definitely wouldn't time out for it.

MrsPiggie · 03/10/2014 10:04

Normal regression when a new baby arrives. Put her back in nappies for a bit and don't make a big deal out of it. It's a shame, but it's not going to make much difference long term.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 03/10/2014 10:05

Just thinking about this my DS is 4.5 and has just started school (first week of full days this week). He is have wet accidents day and night (luckily not poos) despite rarely having any in the last year or more. He's loving school and is used to going there because his sister is there too. But it's a big change and it is impacting on his use of the toilet. Having a sibling is an even bigger change and your DD is much younger so it's not surprising that her potty training has regressed. Obviously I wouldn't put DS back in nappies for school(!) although I did ask if he wanted them at night but for a younger child it's the gentlest thing I think.

butterbeerfloat · 03/10/2014 10:08

My sister was almost 3 when my brother came along, she had been toilet trained almost a year when she took her knickers off and weed in the middle of the living room. My parents were completely shocked and said what are you doing? And she replied "I need a nappy, I'm a baby" where-as previously she was happy being a "big girl" until a new baby was on the scene.
Once the new arrangement has settled she'll go back to being toilet trained, just use pull ups for now!

Original poster

Allisgood1 · 03/10/2014 12:30

Thanks all.

I put her in a pull up but didn't make a big deal of it. Talked about things big girls get to do that babies don't. She did ask for the potty twice. Then told me to "go in the kitchen"! I told her if she needed a poo to go and she did...and did a poo in the toilet!!!

OP posts:

Mrsjayy · 03/10/2014 12:39

Fantastic its difficult for them when a new baby comes along we try our best to do all the right things so they don't get or feel left out she has that little bit of attention and reassurance she needed.

RobotLover68 · 03/10/2014 13:24

Put her back in nappies - my dd regressed when DS2 was born - the pre-school advised putting the nappies back on, so I did - didn't draw attention to it and I think within a couple of weeks she was back out of them

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 03/10/2014 13:56

That's great!

A couple of funny books my DD liked when her brother was born are:

The Perfect Baby

and How to be a Baby by Me the Big Sister

The first is funny as it's about how the new baby could be worse (if it was various animals) but the original baby ends up be best one. The second one shows how much better it is to be a big girl than a baby.

Original poster

Allisgood1 · 03/10/2014 15:43

Thanks ghoul I'm ordering both!

Even though she was successful today I am not getting my hopes up. She did this before and I thought we were through it then she went right back. I didn't make too much fuss when she did go, just reinforced that she's a big girl (and big girls get to watch tv )

OP posts:

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 03/10/2014 16:43

I hope she likes them :)

vdbfamily · 03/10/2014 17:06

I had axactly the same with my 2.5 year old when youngest was born. I put her back in pull ups and she pooed on the loo every day afterwards as she wanted to get rid of the pull-ups. Good luck.

Original poster

Allisgood1 · 03/10/2014 18:03

Well she pooed in the pull up

I think I'm going to be cleaning up poo for the rest of my life.

OP posts:

Mrsjayy · 03/10/2014 18:07

Not forever honest speak to your health visitor about it are you sure she isn't ill has she all her teeth could she be teething

skylark2 · 03/10/2014 18:10

Does she normally poo this many times a day? I'm wondering if she's got a bit of a tummy bug.

Original poster

Allisgood1 · 03/10/2014 18:15

They are small poos. If they were runny or otherwise weird I would think otherwise.

Seeing HV in 2 weeks and will ask. Last time they were no help "it will pass", "it's just a phase".

OP posts:

Mrsjayy · 03/10/2014 18:24

She might be constipated thats why she has small poos

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