To ask for your opinion/experience on the saying...

[my2centsis]

Once a cheater always a cheater? Do you believe it's true? Do you think their are exemptions? Am I clutching at straws?

I think it depends entirely on each individual situation.

I believe its rarely as black and white as some people insist.

No, I don't believe that it is always true.
I'm more a fan of 'fool me once - shame on you, fool me twice - shame on me'.

Well, I'm not sure serial cheaters change.

I think people marry young/change/grow apart/fall out of love/marry the wrong person, which is different.

Mum met someone else as a result of a couple of the above reasons. She never cheated on her 2nd husband. She'd still be lumped in with kerb crawlers on here. Meh.

Really, it depends.

How about "if they'll cheat with you, they'll cheat on you".

Depends. DH used to cheat on his girlfriends as a young man. He's been nothing but loyal to me for the last 8 years we've been together.

Sometimes people do grow out of youthful stupidity. I don't do the same stupid things I did as a young adult either.

I think however hit the nail on the head really.
I think perhaps this is a falme worthy comment, but I think that there are a variety of reasons that people cheat and some are more valid than others.
None less hurtful to the person being cheated on, and all pretty cowardly, but one saying or sentiment can't even begin to cover it all.
Are you OK op?

No it's not true, it's just a generalisation that people say.
I cheated on an ex-bf years ago who I had mistakingly got back together with. Felt awful about it, I'd never do it again, it was a horrible thing to do.

No, I don't believe it's true.

I believe people start in relationships for the wrong reasons (fear of being alone, the desire to "fit in" as part of a couple, fear that nobody else will have them being my main reasons), which can then lead to cheating as a way of bolstering self esteem, as a way of trying to escape from the wrong relationship, as a way of proving that other people wouldn't say no... Not saying it's right mind you, I don't believe it is. But most people are driven in some part by fear - of being found out, of being left alone, of change, of finishing what's obviously wrong and having to deal with the aftermath....

I have cheated and been cheated on in the past.

I have never cheated on my current DH (together 10y) and never will, although some may feel that I cheated with him (we got together as my previous relationship was breaking up).

I am less and less driven by fear, having worked through a lot of my emotional issues in the early days with DH. I have much better self esteem, I love him top to bottom and back again and wouldn't think of putting that at risk.

I do not believe it no. But as others have said it depends on the circumstances.

Your comment about clutching at straws is concerning though.

Some people will always cheat, it's just who they are.

I really think it depends on the circumstances. I've cheated once, I was very young, we wernt serious about each other but I still felt terrible! I'd never do it again.

It really does depend on the person and the circumstances. But no, I don't think the saying is true.

Yes I do think there's something to it, but I do think there are "buts" and "ifs" to it.

I think it depends on the person and the manner of cheating. If it's a one-off, realised it was a mistake then there's a chance, but if it's a lengthy affair with a lot of lying going on then no.

I also think if someone has cheated on you before, they will probably cheat on you again, not necessarily on other people though, it's you they don't love or respect enough.

For me the once is always enough anyway. They've already shown they don't love and respect you. There are enough times during an encounter to think of the person you're supposed to love and honor... but to ignore all those thoughts and be with someone else. My heart would break.

Once might be a symptom of relationship in need of attention. Twice is a habit, and a cause to end a relationship.