to think money and happiness are linked?

[Explored]

At least a bit.

I don't think winning the lottery in itself would make anyone properly happy but I can't see how it's possible to be happy if you're worrying about how to keep a roof over your head or where food will come from at the end of the week. We were poor but we were happy must really depend on just how poor you were, mustn't it?

My Grandad, who grew up very poor and became quite well off used to say "Money can't buy you happiness but it makes being miserable a damn sight more comfortable"

Money really doesn't buy happiness, so I think YABU.

Money can take away certain things that cause stress and worry, but being without those things doesn't equal automatic happiness. It just means you are stressed and worried about money, but there are plenty of other things to be stressed and worried about that money can't touch.

I agree with your Grandad. Having enough money to maintain comfort and allow leisure time is one of the major keys to happiness imo. On the other hand, having too much money can change people for the worse I think.

It can definitely remove a source of stress and anxiety, ie not having enough.

But it also depends on how you earn it, because that can be a source of stress and anxiety too - eg stuck in a job you can't stand.

I think your grandfather is right as well. Studies have shown that money Can make you happier...when you are not worried about necessities, etc. When it's between not having enough for one yacht or another, then the happiness factor goes down.

I am far happier that we have moved in order for dh to get a better job. However, we have also gotten a much smaller house in an older neighborhood in order to use the money better. It's not that having more stuff is making me happier, it's not having to worry that's making me happier.

YANBU.

Financial security certainly reduces stress, so gets rid of that source of unhappiness. But 'secure and rolling in it' doesn't make you any happier than 'secure and doing ok', that's more down to personality and what else is happeing in your life to make you happy/unhappy. But both are better than 'financially insecure and struggling'.

YANBU. Money can't guarantee happiness of course, but it can certainly give you more choices and that helps with a lot of sources of unhappiness.

Even the things that people often say can't be bought - health for example - money can go a long way towards helping, eg if you can pay for private treatment which is hard to access on the NHS.

Some people are happy with nothing. Some people want/need material goods.

However I do think past experience will colour your view; a death or being in a war zone.

The Victorians had a good saying that went along the lines of "earn £20 a year and spend £20 and a shilling that way leads misery, earn £20 and spend £19 and 19 shillings, that way leads happiness" - or cut your cloth accordingly.

When we talk about poverty in this country I don't think we really have a grip on real poverty. We aren't in a drought or a famine or a war zone. If you are hungry a charity or church or the state will feed you, clothe you, put a roof over your head, and there is always clean drinkable water. It's not like you live in a dust bowl and there is nothing.

There is no evidence that people who live in third world countries are more unhappy than those who live in the UK.

As human beings we have basic needs: Food, clothing warmth and to feel safe. A certain level of money is require to provide these things and everyone in the UK has these basics even if its via the benefits system. Human Givens is an interesting theory of what we need to be happy. We also need to feel loved and have someone to love. We also need to feel useful and have a role in society. Money cannot buy love.

"When we talk about poverty in this country I don't think we really have a grip on real poverty. We aren't in a drought or a famine or a war zone. If you are hungry a charity or church or the state will feed you, clothe you, put a roof over your head, and there is always clean drinkable water. It's not like you live in a dust bowl and there is nothing."

However relative poverty is an issue. People on low incomes can sometimes experience social exclusion. Our high tech society makes it tougher to find a job if you are unskilled. The benefits system can make claiments feel they have no sense of purpose in their life. Even wealthy people can feel a lack of purpose/ appreciation if they have a bad employer.

In a third world country where no one has electricity there is issue with "keeping up with the Jones'". A child in say Malawi does not feel socially excluded because his family cannot afford an IPAD because no one in the village has never seen an IPAD.

Money can't buy friends but it gets you a better class of enemy.

money doesn't make you happy, and I'm not rich or married to a wealthy man, I'm skint, permanently so but I am happy. I did have money once upon a time in my life and I drank it, smoked it and shoved it up my nose - fantastic - but was I happy? no. Currently my hoover, my TV and my iron are all broken and I can't afford to either repair or replace any of them (TV went three months ago, hoover went last week, iron went on Friday) and I have run out of washing powder and bread. I have seven quid in my pocket to last me till Wednesday and frankly don't have a pot to piss in but I am happier than I have ever been.

Am I going to eat tonight? no, but I had a baguette earlier and can tank myself up on coffee so I don't feel it. I can use fairy liquid or shampoo instead of washing powder and get my washing done and still have a smile on my face because my life is better than its ever been and in two weeks will get even better.

I think that how you got your money can affect your happiness too - one of the richest people I know is also one of the unhappiest. She always knew that her rich parents would help her out (which they have - they've bought her an amazing property in central London, still pay for her and her DP's amazing holidays even though she's an adult) and therefore she never had any real incentive to work hard or to make sure she started a career. Therefore, despite being very clever and an interesting person, she hasn't got a job (no DCs) and actually feels pretty worthless and like she has no purpose. She applies for jobs but as she has minimum experience nowhere wants to take her (other than minimum wage jobs, which would be quite embarrassing for her in her 30s, given she went to university and all of her friends have high-flying careers). She gets really down every time she gets a rejection and has gone fairly off the rails despite a very privileged start in life, whilst her friends have all settled down, are doing well and are respected in their chosen careers and feel great pride at what they have achieved and the smaller, less glamorous properties they have managed to buy with their own savings. She is also very lonely as all her friends are at work all day and then knackered in the evenings so she has nobody to spend time with.

I've also seen a documentary about people who won the lottery whose lives were ruined by the big win - their families and friends turned against them with jealousy and bitterness, they gambled/drank/partied it away, some of their relationships broke down as they disagreed on how to spend the money and mistrust set in, one family even had to move country as they received lots of death threats.

Obviously having too little money can be awful and stressful but I think having too much can also send people over the edge too. Like all things in life, it's probably best to have it in moderation.

When I was skint, I was happy with my family, our health, counted our blessings etc but hanging over us all of the time was a cloud of foreboding hanging over us all of the time. I knew we were only ever one broken boiler away from being completely in the red and no way of clambering out.

A massive promotion later and I'm still thankful for my healthy family and having a safe warm home, but silly worries about money are gone.

Our life is better since our family income doubled. Much better.

Some people just don't know how to spend it

I know plenty of rich or well off people who are actively unhappy as they get really avaricious and acquisitive. The expectations are raised and they can't see that they've got more than most. They sit there and lament not being able to afford some kind of millionaire lifestyle.

My ex boss with 3 dc in private school, 2 new audis on the drive, designer everything and exotic holidays several times a year. Used to whinge about being hard up!

Wealth seems to cause dissatisfaction if you don't watch out!

I remember reading somewhere that having money doesn't necessarily make you happy, but having more than the people around you gives a significant bump.

Someone very famous once said that the best kind of money is not quite enough. I try and think of that whenever I don't win the lottery.

The very sad fact is that people are happy if they think they're doing better ie have more money than their neighbours and friends. Ie what daddy bear said. Comparison is the thief of joy, but it's really hard to stop doing.

I read somewhere that in the UK the cut off for the link between money and happiness is about £50k household income (a few years ago) - enough not to have to worry about being warm and fed or be anxious at the end of the month, but that having massively more than that did not make you happier

Makes sense to me.

Yes, I remember reading that too Hermione. I think as long as you have somewhere to live, food on the table, good health and good relationships that is really all you need. It's easy to see what others seem to have and feel resentful because you don't have it, but it won't necessarily make you happy. If you got it, you'd just move onto the next thing you can't have. It's taken me years to do this, but I just try really hard to be thankful for the nice things in my life and to be happy that I am healthy, the dc are healthy and dh is healthy. My dh is an optimist and I am a pessimist, but over the years I am really starting to be grateful for the things I used to take for granted. I know that if I got diagnosed with a terminal illness tomorrow, no amount of money is going to make a scrap of difference.

Money can make a lot of difference in certain situations. The experiences of two different women both experiencing DV for example one rich one poor. BOTH experiences are traumatic for BOTH women. However the poor woman and her children could be turned away from a refuge due to cutbacks. While the rich one moves into a flat in Mayfair.

There is a study - somewhere - don't ask me where as I'm going to bed - that shows once you have a disposable income of something like £20K there is no increase in happiness levels. What's surprising is that the level is so low really.

I think there's a point where having "enough" money does help with your mental wellbeing. Not feeling a sense of panic when the electricity bill gets dropped in your mail box, being able to call out a repairman when the fridge breaks down, being able to go to the grocery store without worrying if you can afford enough bread and milk to see you through the week. That's an awful lot less daily stress you are carrying around with you and it gives you opportunities to more fully enjoy other aspects of life.

in my circle, we are by far the poorest couple. I'm often envious of others who have lots of weekends away/holidays/2 cars/no worries about money

BUT some of these people are the sort who are never happy, always moaning about something, and one in particular pleads poverty non stop, and I know for a fact is extremely comfortable

so money doesnt buy happiness it seems....

I've read that it's true about money making you happier but only up to a certain amount - everything above that point makes no difference. Apparently you know you're at that point if, when you do your grocery shop, you don't feel the need to mentally calculate how much you're spending as you go as you know you'll be fine however much it costs.

Once you get to that point, more money doesn't make you happier.