To be THIS upset about a hamster

[ArtyKitty]

I know this is ridiculous. And I never even wanted the bloody hamster in the first place. But after a weekend of helping my recently bereaved father move from the family home and being shattered from manic cleaning and packing
I got back to my home 3 hours away, go to bed, then have my Dp wake me to say the wee guy wasn't well. An hour later we're at the 24 hr vets putting him to sleep and I'm bawling my eyes out like an idiot. Brilliant. I am pathetic, aren't I? But I still can't cope with dealing with his little empty cage tomorrow...

Not pathetic just very tired, stressed and now grieving for your tiny friend.

Give yourself a break!

Arty - it's not so much the hamster as everything else. Your "recently bereaved father" - was it your mum or stepmum who died? And you've lost your "family home" as well?

Oddly enough, I knew someone else who had a string of bereavements/losses and held it all together but completely lost it when the hamster died (yes, it really was another hamster!) - because it was just the last straw that broke the camel's back.

So no, you are not pathetic, it's just the hamster is your "last straw" - be kind to yourself, take it easy and realise you've a lot to deal with just now.
(((hugs)))

Thank you. Xx

I meant on top of everything your dealing with.

I remember literally falling to pieces over a burnt piece of toast when I was going through similar to you

Think I definitely cracked tonight!! I say recently bereaved- it's my mum and 3 years ago but to dad it was yesterday. He's found it hard to let go of her. But that said, my boy was an amazing hamster, and I'm very sad to say goodbye. But also I cried when bouncer died in neighbours in the 1980s so I am quite unreasonable when it comes to animal deaths!

I think you would be very unreasonable to be honest having recently lost my niece at seven days old, if I didn't think you had other things going on that the hamster has come to represent, if you see what I mean. Hope you are ok in general.

(((hugs))) caff - how are you doing? And your DB and DSIL?

I'm ok thank you Thumbwitch, although oddly I feel like I'm dwelling on DN's funeral a bit sometimes and worrying about DB and Sil quite a lot. I'm trying to get the balance right between calling them and not if you know what I mean?

Yes I do. Maybe text them regularly and let them know you're there for them to call if they want?

PM me if you want to continue to chat :)

Coolio, hope didn't derail thread, OP, and hope you will feel better soon.

It was probably the straw that broke the camel's back by reminding you about death.

But, there's nothing wrong with crying over a hamster. I cried when my small animals died.

I am inconsolable whenever one of our pets die. When our fantastic hamster died last year we were all very weepy for ages. And dealing with the empty cage etc is horrible.
You have been through a very tough time lately - give yourself a break.
Sometimes a good sob helps to release the tension.

Good grief if course you are upset.

Rough time too as well as the loss of your pet.

So sorry op.

You are NOT being ridiculous

I had to put one of my rats to sleep early August, we'd just got back from a really stressful holiday and I sobbed. DP had to speak to my client at one point whilst I tried to get my breath back to talk to them and reschedule for the next day

Have a nice sweet tea and take your time, pets are important to us and would usually be a source of comfort in times of stress, so to lose them at those times makes you feel 1000 times worse

My friend keeps her hamsters alive in spirit and chipping into family debates randomly from beyond the grave. ok maybe they are a slightly eccentric family You loved your pet and of course you will miss it.

Y y to that about pets being a source of comfort in times of stress.

Very good point. Loosing them equates to loosing a real comfortable warm loving friend who doesn't ask of you.

i couldnt wait for my dd hamster to go it stank the place out , but when it died i did have a cry , i dont think yabu .

Aw don't be hard on yourself. When the kids were young a few years ago we had rather allot of guinea pigs and the inevitable deaths from old age always always resulted in a big wave of snot and tears - and not just from the kids!

XH was always a bit

It's ok to be upset about losing a pet, I think it probably isn't just about the hamster dying though, it's everything having accumulated.

When Our guinea pig died I was devastated, he was a lovely character and we'd had him since he was born.

I ha a miscarriage the week before he died so even though I was upset about my guinea pig I think it was more about the mc.

artykitty be kind to yourself, as others have said this is not just about hamster, lovely as he was, but grief for your Mum and family home. Everything is worse when you are tired and stressed. If it had been another day, when you were well rested and relaxed, you would have felt able to tackle cage cleaning...

Goodness, I feel very well looked after by everyone on here! Thank you for being so kind. Caff, you are absolutely right, I can only imagine what you're going through and you've reminded me to keep things in perspective. I hope you are staying strong. BBQs I'm sorry for your loss too and I think you and others are right to say that it's probably more about the other things going on.

And thank you all for cheering me up with nice words! I actually asked this to be deleted because there's a Mnetter at work and I thought she'd recognise the details but I'm very glad it's still here because it's been lovely reading your replies. Xx

:)