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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To request advice on periods for my fiancee

80 replies

apologies · 16/09/2014 10:22

(I am male and a long time reader of these wonderful boards. I previously posted under the name "Milkybar28" for advice regarding my engagement - but now can't remember the login details!)

My fiancee and I are marrying in the middle of next month. Her period has just arrived a week early and thus will probably do the same next month (so I'm told), meaning she will be starting her period in the days before the wedding.

She is intensely worried about bleeding onto her dress and her already high stress levels are now through the roof so I'm asking for advice on delaying periods. She is not on the pill so merging packets is not an option.

We have done some research and Noristhisterone seems to be a solution (we know it's not a contraceptive).

Can anyone advise whether this is a reliable one off solution? And if so any potential side effects?
If not does anyone have any alternative suggestions- would a Mooncup be of any use?

Thankyou in advance for potentially saving my soon-to-be Wife's sanity!

OP posts:
mrssmith79 · 16/09/2014 15:16

m.boots.com/mt/www.boots.com/en/Pharmacy-Health/Online-Clinic/Period-delay/

Here you go OP. If your oh doesn't want to make a GP appointment, Boots can offer the service online subject to assessment. And congratulations to you both!

Lweji · 16/09/2014 15:17

Don't women post about their partner's health issues ED?

Lweji · 16/09/2014 15:18

The bride has already booked with her GP, and both did the research.
This is only for reassurance. I think it's fine.

ImperialBlether · 16/09/2014 15:20

Yes, Lweji, but they don't tend to go onto a men's forum and ask them, do they?

Original poster
apologies · 16/09/2014 15:23

ImperialBlether - I'm sure she could but she has a tendency to think the worst and assume there is no solution, meaning she wouldn't look into any options that aren't immediately obvious without some nudging. She is also highly stressed by the wedding planning (as explained upthread). Knowing this I thought that taking a proactive lead in finding out all the "fixes" might be a good idea.

I do appreciate that it is unusual to be posting for advice about this issue (as also acknowledged upthread) but on this occasion I decided that my fiancee's peace of mind was important enough to risk any opprobrium from posters such as yourself and rely instead on those who have been kind enough to share their thoughts. I could have created a new username and posted as a female but to my mind that would have been even worse, frank honesty generally being the best policy.

I haven't specifically "asked women about their periods" and apologise if my request came across as in any way creepy or strange. I asked specifically for thoughts on a certain type of drug or any other solutions. In hindsight perhaps I should have just limited it to experience of Noristhisterone as I'm sure she's aware of the other suggestions from the many other posters - but nonetheless they are all helpful and appreciated.

Bizarrely I recall you also had an issue with my savings and rental arrangements in my very first post.

Thankyou once again to everyone for your advice. I'm sure a combination of some sorts will ensure a happy wedding day. I will now sign off and if more info is needed I'll try to convince my fiancee to return.

OP posts:
Only1scoop · 16/09/2014 15:23

I don't think I used 'weird' at all and it's certainly not a 'taboo' in our household either ....but I can't lie ....would be surprised if Dp posted asking about preventing dress stainage and moon cups on an Internet forum....

He'd probably find it strange if I posted on a predominantly male forum about penile secretion and other linked subjects.

Each to their own....

Perhaps Op was bored of looking at table plans and favour boxes.

Lweji · 16/09/2014 15:25

This particular poster had already used MN to ask about a personal issue related to the marriage and got great (ahem) advice.
I'm not surprised he'd come here again for female experience. No point in asking about periods in a male forum, is there?
Not sure he'll be so pleased this time with the backlash. What is that all about?

LittleMisslikestobebythesea · 16/09/2014 15:27

I have used norethisterone and it's fine for me, horrendous period 3 days after taking it though so get enough for honeymoon too.

My periods were irregular and you need to start it 3 days before, so I told my GP and they told me to start it a week earlier than i need to (so 1 week 3 days before period) and gave me enough for the holiday, so 3 tablets a day for however long.

I wouldn't recommend starting a mini pill as they don't stop everyone's periods, but norethisterone does.

Tutt · 16/09/2014 15:32

Go to the GP, I really don't get the nasty comments of 'does she normally bleed on her clothes' why for some it can't be helped.
My periods are seriously horrific ( always have been) and quite easily bleed through every thing no matter what sanitary protection I use and no meds help.
On my wedding day I was so worried that I had on 3 pairs of pants with sanitary protection PLUS the proper incontinence pants.
Unless you bleed to the point where this is a very real worry and also embarrassing and unwanted it is very unkind to judge!

Bearbehind · 16/09/2014 15:40

Unless you bleed to the point where this is a very real worry and also embarrassing and unwanted it is very unkind to judge!

But if that was the case here surely the OP's fiancée would prioritise finding herself a solution rather than concentrating on other aspects of the wedding and leaving her gyneacological worries to be dealt with by her husband to be.

fluffyraggies · 16/09/2014 15:53

If you're still reading OP i can add to the posters who have used Noris and had no probs at all. Take it 3 times a day and your period stays away.

As for the rest of it i think it's definitely unusual for a man to be involved in his partners menstrual whys and wherefores. To be honest.

Is 'unusual' always also 'weird'? Depends on your personal choice of phrase i suppose.

StairsInTheNight · 16/09/2014 16:13

Take ibuprofen, google it for how to use to make your period lighter.

MrsFionaCharming · 16/09/2014 22:38

offbeatbride.com/2013/08/how-to-pee

This link might help if it's changing her pads/tampons she's concerned about.

Bulbasaur · 16/09/2014 23:01

I don't see what's wrong with him asking and checking it out for her. When I had DD and was having trouble BF, DH went and did a bunch of research and made phone calls while I spoke to the lactation consultant. He also researched birthing methods and dietary needs for me. (I ended up FF, which was best)

Point is, there's nothing wrong with asking on someone's behalf.

Things that make my periods lighter and slow down flow, don't eat junk food, sugar, or caffeine (do your best), for a couple months. She probably isn't anyway because of wedding diet. But it'll help prevent bloating and it might make the flow a bit slower and lighter. It does for me.

DorisIsALittleBitPartial · 16/09/2014 23:11

Oh bless you for worrying about this on behalf of your OH! I had the same - I was due on the day of my wedding so went to the GP and was prescribed Noresthisterone. I took it as prescribed but by the time of my wedding day/due day my PMT was through the roof and I was so bloated that I looked like a sausage squeezed into my wedding dress and my boobs were seriously falling out the top Blush so much so that on the morning I seriously thought about going into town to try and find a new outfit! But that was better to me than worrying all day about first day of period and potential leakage and rushing to the bathroom all day.
You sound lovely, btw.

Pipbin · 16/09/2014 23:12

I can see why she would be worried. I am lucky in that I get quite light and short periods, but it would be just one thing to worry about.

Anyway - my advice is about 30 years old but it might help. When I was a teenager I used to go to a summer camp for a week and you can be sure that it would always work out that it would be my period week. A couple of times I had to go to the GP and get some tablets to stop it. Worked a treat every time.

QuintessentiallyQS · 16/09/2014 23:14

She could maybe wear a maroon dress instead?

PleaseLetMeKeepTheSportsCar · 17/09/2014 10:27

Why does it matter that she's not posting? Why does it matter of she does bleed through her clothes? These aren't subjects that the OP wants answers to or to question.

I have taken tablets to delay period, can't remember the name of them sorry so not helpful at all!

Also, I would be extremely paranoid having a period and having to wear a white/ivory dress

chocolatedonut · 17/09/2014 10:33

I went to the doctor for norithestrone (sorry for spelling) and he prescribed me one month supply of the pill to take. My period came when I'd finished the packet.

specialsubject · 17/09/2014 11:03

she needs to go to the GP NOW to try out the drug. Because it doesn't work for everyone so she may need a plan B. No internet 'research', no 'doctor google' - see someone who spent years at medical school.

and she also needs to look at longer term treatment. Periods should be a minor inconvenience - if they aren't, something needs sorting out. Not always that easy but she should try.

PorkPieandPickle · 17/09/2014 12:36

I think it's lovely that you're enlightened enough to post on behalf of your stb dw.
FWIW, I have really heavy periods. Usually regular as clockwork, until of course my wedding, where it showed up a week early at 3am on the day Angry
My biggest worry was at what point to break it to my new DH! Grin your DP doesn't have that problem, and I think it's lovely.
I coped fine btw, with tampons, even with the big ivory dress. Most of the time I was so excited I forgot about it.
No other advice, just wanting to wish you all the best.

Castlemilk · 17/09/2014 13:05

I can see why she'd worry - but to be honest, I'd be far more wary about the medication, unless as you've said she can do some sort of test run. Bleeding on the dress is very unlikely, and I'd worry far more about starting something 'new' like the pill in the days before the wedding - an unknown quantity - what if I had a bad reaction? it gave me the runs? spots? caused massive wind and bloating?

I wouldn't take that chance - I'd much rather deal with the known quantity by using super tampons backed up with a slim pad and make sure I got to the loo regularly. If she's never leaked with hugely heavy periods, really it will be fine.

Pheonixisrising · 17/09/2014 13:34

GP will give her tablets to stop her period
It's not a biggy
Hope you have a great day , enjoy !

KoalaKoo · 17/09/2014 13:45

Op you dont need to see the gp for norethisterone. It is a category of medicine now available from uk online pharmarcies with oversight by online gp. Very easy and quite inexpensive. Clear simple instructions availsble on the pharmacy sites. You need to start it few days before period due so I would order it now to familiarise yourself with it.

KoalaKoo · 17/09/2014 13:46

I mean, this is a totally legal safe and legit service, not black market or something!