to hate people correcting my grammar/accent?

[vrocket]

I'm really not a member of the grammar police in forums and everyday speech.
I do think there is a time and a place for correct grammar, ie. official emails, letters and the like.
But I find it blood boiling when people correct me when I'm having a general conversation!
People correct my pronunciation (I'm from east london, so have a typical cockney accent).
So I'll sat wa-er for water etc. And the amount of times people have said 'Don't you mean waTer' scoff scoff.
I mean, you understood me didn't you? GRRRR.
And correct my grammar. I'll say something like 'x drove me and y to the supermarket' and some cocky bastard will pipe up with "Don't you mean x drove y and I to the supermarket'.
I loved that one, it meant I got to say to said cocky bastard 'no I actually should have said x drove y and ME, so not only are you patronising, you're thick as shit'.
I'm sure you have gathered by now there is indeed a particular cocky bastard that I'm referring to.
So AIBU to think that if you can understand me during a colloquial conversation, it doesn't matter if my grammar isn't perfect, and that my accent is FINE!!
(rant over)

YANBU. They are rude.

YANBU. But why are you still talking to the person? Can you not avoid them?

I am a grammar pedant but YANBU and have rude friends

I think if you are anything older than someone in full time education NO-ONE should be correcting the way you speak.

You need to come up with a one liner response for this cocky bastard.

Hopefully someone on this thread wittier than me can provide one.

And by the way, there's nothing much wrong with your post - you even spell grammar correctly.

My 3-year old has been corrected at home for dropping T's in her words. What is somewhat cringeworthy is that she has no issue with correcting adults when we're out:
Shop assistant to DD: "Bye darling, see you la'er"
DD: "Its la-Ter!"
Me: Silent, smile apologetically and run.

However, as we don't have a cockney accent, and neither DH nor I drop our T's it's not unreasonable for us to correct DD.

In a general conversation I wouldn't correct a friend. If someone had written an email/letter etc. which was incorrect then depending on who it was then I'd let them know. As an example, a friend asked me to proof-read a letter for her. It contained "should of" and "there" instead of "their".

Thanks guys, you've been really reassuring.
It's one of DP's in-laws.
I usually avoid them like the plague, but one of DP's grandparents hasn't been very well lately, so everyone's been making an effort to go round more often, bringing the kids round etc.
The reason I was asking is that DP thinks I'm being 'sensitive' and seems to think it's all in good humour.
I clearly don't agree.
Fenton, that's exactly what I need, a couple of good one liners to come back with.
I'm not very quick though, and it won't be until the next day, and I'll think 'Oh God, why didn't I say xyz'.
That was why I'm so proud of my 'y and me' comment

Op, you're right, there's nothing wrong with using dialect or having an accent.
Correct grammar is important in writing, less so in speech, especially when combined with an accent or dialect.
Being Cornish I get this a lot. I just smile & say "that's right", then repeat what I said the first time.

Friend at allotments: 'Alright then, MehChild, do you want to come along and help me plant my letses?' (in thick local accent, of which I speak a thinner version)
MehChild (aged about 7): 'Plant your what?'
Friend: 'Letses. You not eat letses, then?'
MehChild: 'I have never heard of let-ses' (in loud, clear, declaiming RP type voice)
Friend: 'These here. Letses.'
MehChild: 'Oh, you mean lettuces. Those are called let-tu-ces, Friend.' (In tone of arse-aching superiority).

I was mortified. Fortunately the friend in question fell about laughing, and told MehChild she was a right card, even as I told her that Friend was fully entitled to say lettuces any way he wanted.

So no, YANBU.

Ah well, I could learn to speak the Queen's English if I had to, but you on the other hand will always be an arse

or something..

God this thread has reminded me of when DS, aged about 6, told Grandad off for saying "somethink"

"It's something Grandad! Mummy says saying "somethink is really common

He was livid.

Hang on, isn't "x drove me and y...etcetc the correct grammar?

You would say "Y and I went to...blahblah" But isn't 'me' the object pronoun in your example?

You don't need clever one-liners. Just tell them they're rude and stare at them.

If they apologise, accept it and ask them not to do it again. You might need to repeat that treatment until they get the message.

If they say it's a joke or for your own good or some other excuse, tell them that you will not be speaking to them and will ignore their comments until they've learned some manners. Then walk away.

If DP objects say: 'I've dealt with it. Thanks.'

Good luck. You'll feel 10 feet tall once you've pulled them up. I promise.

I'm amazed. People actually try and correct you? Popular culture/ media is full of people who talk just as you do. I think what you are getting at is being annoyed with those people who think it is part of general 'dumbing down' as it assumes you don't know any better and so to talking like you do comes across as uneducated/unintelligent to the uninitiated.

I have a Canadian Eastern European immigrant relative who has always prided herself on her grasp of the English language and when she lived in Florida she was always correcting her American neighbours' grammar. I don't think she was too popular...

When she visited Britain for the first time she was both shocked and horrified at the 'sloppy' way people spoke. I really think many people who have learnt English as a second language find it difficult when the 'Queen's English' they have learnt is not used by the majority of English people.

As a Teacher of English as a Foreign Language for many years it was excruciating for many foreign students, for example, when asked 'Please could you tell me how to get to the station?' To be answered ' You wha'? Go' ya! Go lef' den righ' ' ge' off at Wa'erloo' or something akin to that.

The English language is constantly evolving and historically rich and complex, with towns/cities only a few miles from each other and with very different dialects.

I suppose the answer is to adapt how you speak on a case by case basis if you want to be understood and you want them to understand you/ or if you want to come across educated/intelligent

Haha, MehsMum and hamptoncourt.
I find it hilarious when kids say things.
Especially when you see their parents looking absolutely mortified!
I find the things kids come out with in general hilarious, they have no shame!

What Fenton said. So glad you managed to get one up on the smug idiot who corrected you wrongly!

Although I'll be honest, I do wince inwardly when people say 'wa-er' 'bu-er' etc., instead of water and butter. It does sound so harsh and ugly and rough. I would not be rude enough to correct you, but I would find it unpleasant to listen to. Sorry.

It's the kind of thing that might stop me offering you certain types of job that you might otherwise be capable of doing as well, so it's worth bearing in mind that even if people don't outwardly judge you, inwardly they might.

DontDrinkAndFacebook, having my accent I was very aware from a very young age that many people feel the way you do, I think that it's sad really (sad as in unhappy, not as in 'you're so sad' IYKWIM).
People definitely see it as a lack of intelligence, which it really isn't.
Just think it's a shame I can't speak the way my family have for generations.
I do have change the way I speak for interviews, I have a "phone voice" etc.
It's sad, but it is what it is.

Skimming so apologies if it's already been said, but
"'ll say something like 'x drove me and y to the supermarket' and some cocky bastard will pipe up with "Don't you mean x drove y and I to the supermarket'. - you are right and scb is wrong. The way to tell is if you remove 'y' from the equation, the sentence still makes sense.
"X drove I to the supermarket" doesn't make sense!

MrsCosmopilite, I knew it was me and not I (that's exactly how I do it, take the y out and see if it makes sense), but I think you're supposed to always put the 'y' in front?
Not that it mattered either way, and they interrupted my story!

I would just say 'If you are having trouble understanding me then I would be happy to speak a bit more s-l-o-w-l-y to give you a chance to catch up. When they protest that they can understand you perfectly, tell them that in that case, they are obviously a condescending cunt and can fuck right off instead.

its so rude.

start looking all confused and interrupting him when he talks ... saying "what?", "sorry?" "i dont understand you" etc. give him a taste of his own medicine. i feckin would!!

I will correct my children's grammar and pronunciation (my DS is a voracious reader and often mis-pronounces words he hasn't heard spoken yet) but would never correct an adult.

That is just not on.

Got this when pg with Dc3.I was at the gp's.I'm a foreigner but I think my English is pretty good.I was talking about the kids and said "all of them" referring to my 2 kids.gp had a littl chuckle then informed me I should have said "both of them" as I was referring ton2 children.she was right,but I thought it was so rude to correct me,she understood what I meant!

I frequently correct DSs grammar and pronunciation but he's 5 and I'm his mother so I'm allowed! That being said it's the absolute height of bad manners to correct another adults grammar/pronunciation and seems like a deliberate way of 'putting you in your place' so to speak.
I'd just mutter fuck off under your breath if I were you and feign innocence if they mention it

I get my slight speech impediment corrected by some randoms and hassle for my resultant soft speaking voice. These people get very hard stares.

I would probably reply "Do you mean you didn't understand what I said?"