To be confused when people say "Are you mad?"

[soapybubbles123]

DH and I have been together since we were sixteen, fast forward ten years and we are married with a baby.

When the question "How did you meet" arises I say that I found DH on the school bus

The thing that hacks me off is when some people, on hearing that DH was my first boyfriend (and first everything else) ask questions such as "Why on earth would you do that?" and "Don't you wonder what its like to sleep with someone else?"

I'm not fussed about their opinions but how exactly am I supposed to respond to that?

Well you would believe that, you've only slept with one person. Of course you're eager to support your own theory.

If someone I knew asks if I am mad, I always say that yes, I am. But I have Bipolar disorder (and being able to answer the question that way is the only okay thing about a completely shit illness).

I think it would be lovely to meet someone you love and stay with them forever, early on. Why would you want to break up with people, go through heartache, have massive arguments and have awkward encounters with exes, when you could find happiness early on?

vdb thank you for the info but I'm always extremely skeptical of anyone who blogs from a religious perspective, writes articles from a religious perspective, or publishes studies from a religious perspective, because there is such a strong bias before you even start, and it's easy to skew the results to support what you want it to. This is why I've had a look at TSP's blog and decided none of it's worth reading or even paying attention to. (He even talks about the "death of Darwinism" and why evolution is Not A Real Thing, which is very worrying for someone who is a doctor.)

Also, what squoosh said.

pico because who you did or didn't sleep with before you married your DH is none of his business. Both feeling lucky to have been each others first and only is one thing, a DH thinking it's any of his business to 'mind' is quite another.

Seeing sex as something intimate and to be shared with few people isn't a 1950s value

No, it isn't, but the thought that a MAN has the RIGHT to approve or disapprove of who his wife has slept with before they got married IS.

I met dh at 18 and have been with him for 18 years now. I'd had 3 boyfriends before him, he'd had 1 girlfriend but nothing serious. When I've told people they've only ever said things like 'that's sweet' etc.
It's very rude of them to say 'are you mad?!'

I disagree. I am in part a product of my own history, he gets me as a whole including my previous experiences. In the same way I get the same of him.

And I didn't say "approve/disapprove", I said "appreciate". Why can't we appreciate that in each other. Or can I appreciate that in him, but he can't reciprocate because you think that would be sexist?

Honestly, it is fairly reasonable to partner people who share each others values. Why should we have to share your values, we aren't in a relationship with you?