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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Kids not at school?

68 replies

autumn5678 · 08/09/2014 13:32

I posted recently about horrible new neighbours moving onto our street (rubbish everywhere, fag butts being thrown over fence, hoards of kids outside walking past swinging golf clubs and swearing etc)

Anyway, there are kids (from this house) outside today on the green, golf clubs in tow. All the schools round here have gone back..? I noticed Thursday and Friday they were out there on their own as all the other kids round here are now at school, but am really shocked that they are still out there today as there is definitely no way now there school hasn't gone back yet!

Is there anyone you should inform in this situation? Or have I overlooked something? As much as I am obviously concerned that they aren't at school, I'm also blooming annoyed as I was looking forward to some quiet once September came, wishful thinking!!

OP posts:
NynaevesSister · 12/09/2014 11:33

There is no legal obligation. The council can make it seem like there is but there isn't. At no point did I say it was an easy opt out. Or say that this is what all home education is. I was just clarifying the assumption that home educating always means the parents put in the same level if effort, and more, than schools. Not all parents use the home education route to actually educate their children.

The traveller families that live on and off in the house opposite don't send their kids to school. The only requirement to home educate is to put it in writing to the local authority. They then give details of the person to contact to come and check on how you are doing. But although the letter is worded as if you have to do this, in fact you don't.

Out of the families that have lived there only one exhibited that sort of anti social behaviour (and then some - I still can't get all the egg stains off the outside of the house) including the children smoking.

NoodleOodle · 12/09/2014 12:31

The woman I know who home educates smokes weed with her three teenaged daughters. They also sit at a table with computer and internet and do "lessons". When the sun is out, they relax and enjoy it, and do their lessons when it suits them.

I don't get on with the woman but just offering them up as an example of people who smoke, don't go to school, and are HE.

autumn5678 · 12/09/2014 19:24

quick update: Haven't been home much today but the time I have been has been pretty quiet, so have held off contacting anyone as they could well have been at school!! (fingers crossed)

The street still looks absolutely awful though and the stream of swearing/littering kids has not stopped since late afternoon. To add to the fag butts and match boxes being thrown over their fence, they have now started throwing over the cigarette boxes. Really getting me down though, knowing as well that these kids are only young (6 - 13 I would guess) and knowing that it's going to get so much worse as they get older, and with parents that obviously could not care less and seem to be just as bad as the kids.

OP posts:
ILovePud · 12/09/2014 19:31

Glad that it's been a bit quieter, I'm sorry that all the other shit is still going on though, Sad hope you have a better weekend.

autumn5678 · 12/09/2014 19:35

Thanks ILovePud trying to not let myself get too worked up about it, just so bloody frustrating! Hope you have a nice weekend too Smile

OP posts:
Magpiemystery · 12/09/2014 19:45

You poor thing. I bet they are a problem family and have been moved in from elsewhere.

You need to get into the police, council etc and start a log of events and they might be moved on from you eventually.

Truly awful for you op

morethanpotatoprints · 12/09/2014 20:54

Nynaeves

Your assumption would be wrong then.
There is no need to put in the same amount of effort as a school does, that is part if not all of the appeal to many H.ed parents.

lljkk · 12/09/2014 22:47

Sheesh, Gals, surely we all know this ISN'T a thread or situation about HE?

It's as much about HE as it is about private education (see my golf club comment earlier).

Incidentally, HEing families I know are much stricter than avg school-ed family, have much higher expectations that their kids must behave socially responsibly and be supportive of each other & the family unit. My kids are selfish brats on verge of ASBOs in comparison.

NynaevesSister · 13/09/2014 02:10

Well exactly llijk. The friends I have who HE are like that too. But I am going to get kicked for saying that it would seem as much as I am for saying that some parents just use it not to send their kids to school and don't do a thing with them. Apparently just mentioning HE is some kind of attack. I think that says more about them.

And all I wanted to do was point out that this family's children may not be truant at all but legally not enrolled in school. :)

lljkk · 13/09/2014 12:18

yeah, bit of a shame folk jumped to defensiveness. I thought it was obviously a comment on legal status not a declaration about HE in general.

marne2 · 13/09/2014 12:28

I remember your other post. I would be annoyed if these people were living near me ( though I'm not used to this type of behaviour as we live in a very quite village ). Could they be travellers? A lot are being forced to take housing now, I know some members of the traveller community are not big on education and girls often stop going to school at a early age. There's also a chance that they have not found a school that will take them yet?

Anyway, it's the education thing that would bother me, it's more the behaviour and the chucking fag buts and boxes over the wall, I would report them to the council or HA and I'm sure others living near by will do the same ( if they havn't already ).

We have one neighbour that really annoys us, they let their teen daughter scream and swear all the time, I know it's not a biggy but my dd's are often playing outside and have to hear this language ( which often includes the C word ), I'm quite pleased summer is almost over and they will not be in the garden as much.

autumn5678 · 13/09/2014 14:06

They have a local accent so I don't think they are travellers. I think what someone else previously mentioned is correct, that they have been moved on from another house, as they seem to know a load of kids from the estate.

I just can't believe how awful our street looks since they've been here. Ours has always been one of the most quiet and well kept. The house adjacent to theirs belongs to an old man who had a stroke a few years back, he really doesn't leave the house much anymore. The kids are constantly sitting on his wall and ripping off parts of his bushes, granted not really major things but what I could imagine could be quite intimidating to someone who is pretty much housebound. But as I mentioned in my last post, I'm just too worried to say anything to them for fear of repercussions due to what happened last year.

They have a huge fence which the previous owners modified: regular brick wall, about 5ft 6 high, with fence panels stuck on top so it is at least 7ft high all in all maybe higher. On top of this they stuck nails with the sharp bits pointing up (we've always said we aren't sure if this is even legal?!), to deter burglars I assume as their garden backs on to the street.

Since I saw the two kids jumping over it the other day they seem to be getting over it all the time. How long before one of them slips and gets impaled on one of the nails?! You would think even the mother would have the common sense to stop, but I've seen her come out of the house and walk past the fence while one of her kids is dangling over from the other side!

Just gobsmacked really, feel so gutted these people have moved in.

OP posts:
morethanpotatoprints · 13/09/2014 14:22

I'm not sure anybody did jump to the defensive, unless I missed it.
If I gave the impression of this I'm sorry, I was just passing on knowledge and experience.
They could well be a H.ed family or might not be.
I don't think it matters it is the problem they are giving the OP that's important.

autumn5678 · 15/09/2014 13:55

SUCCESS! No kids to be seen or heard so they must be at school. I celebrated by going out with my broom and sweeping up the mound of rubbish which has formed alongside their wall and swept it into a neat pile outside their door.

OP posts:
kinkyfuckery · 15/09/2014 13:59

What do you think leaving it outside their door is going to do? That seems very confrontational to me!

WhatsGoingOnEh · 15/09/2014 14:04

If they're council tenants, why don't you just ring the council and make a formal complaint about their behaviour? I thought that was an option?

KnittedJimmyChoos · 15/09/2014 14:11

Only on MN would people suggest these children are being home educated well they probably are but what in is the question.

KnittedJimmyChoos · 15/09/2014 14:12

Or maybe they are indy kids who go back later than normal schools?

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