Can I take DC to a kitchen tea?

[francisdrakehasleprosy]

WIBU to take bf DC of 6 months with to a kitchen tea? I have already declined the overthetop hen party invite on account of DC, but don't have help so that I can leave DC at home or elsewhere for the kitchen tea. It is a friend's kitchen tea, but we're not that close. I would be able to leave early if DC kicks off although I have promised a lift to someone. Cake and champagne and so forth at a fancyish restaurant in the late afternoon to early evening, but since the gifts and chat will be knickers and bras and sex anyway I don't necessarily think bringing DC would "lower the tone". I have not yet asked if I can bring DC and wanted to get some opinions first before I ask. Who knows, I might even BU even to ask?

What's a kitchen tea?

I also need to know what a kitchen tea is.

what the fook is a kitchen tea????

Do you mean afternoon tea?

Eh?

Ask. I might be a bit annoyed tbh. Usually parents make it clear if children are welcome.

It's an informal and non-fancy get together with food often it's used for baby showers and hen do's which aren't lavish.

According to goggle it's like a sedate hen party? In which case ywbu to take the dc

I don't know what a kitchen tea is but I recently went to a hen party where there was a newborn at the afternoon tea part of the day. He just slept in his pram. I didn't take my then 7 month old as I thought he'd be a bit disruptive (and was able to stay with his Dad and some expressed milk anyway).
It can't hurt to ask, the worst you'll get is a no!

I don't know what a kitchen tea is but then later you describe cake and champagne in a fancyish restaurant. Is that a kitchen tea?

If it is then no I wouldn't take DC and I wouldn't ask. If baby was a quiet newborn that's one thing, but a six month old will be wanting to sit on your knee, be jiggled, grab cutlery, squawk, probably have a sit on the floor etc. If it was a casual meal with other kids then fine but at someone's hen do I think it's just too much attention for DC needed.

When I got married a good friend couldn't come for my hen do because she was bfing her two kids. We went for a spa day near her just the two of us instead which was lovely. Could you do something similar? Or just afternoon tea somewhere kid friendly for the two of you?

So it's and informal hen do? And you want to just go the afternoon? I'd expect it to be child free but ask as friend may prefer you to attend with baby than not attend at all.

Friend originally from NZ and kitchen teas are the done thing there. The more civilised version of a hen do, preceding the drunkenness with cake. The sort of hen party you can invite DM and MIL to, without them having to see you drunkenly snogging the bar tender during the real do.

Damn I type way too slow. Everyone else has already explained what it is.

Thanks everyone. Guessing that yes it would be a potentially bad idea. TBH I'm scared of worried about asking and being labled "That Mum" as I already bailed out of hen do on account of DC. Guess maybe I will cancel at late notice if I still.cannot find someone to look after DC on the day. (Do have a DH BTW but he is away for work that weekend.)

You really don't have anyone to babysit? Do you never go out without DC?

They are all the rage where I am. Usually they are kitchen tea/Tupperware parties with the aim of starting off the brides Tupperware collection.

If I had a baby, I'd take him then I'd be able to use him as an exit strategy.

Savoy perhaps you have a very good point!!
Piper not really . I have asked a few friends, but they are either also going to the kitchen tea or already have plans as I left it rather late to ask (next wk-end). I do have an offer from a friends' 14yr old, but erm I'm not sure I'm comfortable enough yet to leave DC at 6 months old with another kid . Would you? I tend to take the little one with me to places as DC is generally a very calm baby and really likes looking at new things, or else DH (who will be away on that weekend) will look after DC when I go out.

I wouldn't ask to take him.

Kitchen tea, that's new to me. Newborn fine, any older and I wouldn't to be honest.