Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not move in with partner til he's paid off his IVA?

3 replies

WhoeverYouWantMeToBe · 02/09/2014 18:44

My partner (of 18 months) and I have discussed living together. A few years ago his personal life meant he got out of his depth with money and ended up opting to get an IVA. He has managed really well on v.limited income for last four years and his IVA is due to be paid up September 2015.
He has assured me that if he moved in he'd be able to pay half of all my bills, as he is paying rent/bills in his current house so no difference. However I would prefer to wait until he has paid off the IVA til he moves in. I can't put my finger on why, something about it makes me uncomfortable. The idea of debt freaks me out, and I am v.careful with money. It's not like I think he wants an easy ride or access to my money (which he wouldn't get anyway, we would maintain our own bank accounts) I rent my very modest little house so it's not like he could somehow 'get his feet under the table', and I wouldn't have to support him if he's paying his way. AIBU to want to wait til it's paid off? Or just a bit over cautious? Maybe I just need to chill out.

OP posts:
maddening · 02/09/2014 18:48

If his living costs change I think he is meant to speak to his Iva company as a proportion might have go in to the Iva - I would do it above board as he could compromise his Iva agreement.

It shouldn't affect your credit file and I think you would not bu to seek to keep an eye on the household budget.

WhoeverYouWantMeToBe · 02/09/2014 18:50

Thanks, yeah he would definitely let them know about his change in expenses if they need to then alter the amount he's paying, have read lots about the trouble you can get into for fiddling your details.

OP posts:
Optimist1 · 02/09/2014 18:50

Listen to your instincts on this one. A further year and you'll both be on a more equal footing, so to speak. Personally I might be inclined to wait till he was 6-months post-IVA, but my wish to live with my loved one might override that cautiousness! Grin

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread