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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to ask DP to take antihistamines?

20 replies

ClockWatchingLady · 02/09/2014 15:30

He's so snotty. Must be an allergy (he's had it for years). Snores, sniffs, sneezes, etc.

He won't take anything, or do anything about it - says it doesn't bother him.

Am I being an arsehole to nag him about it? I hate the noise.

OP posts:
ditavonteesed · 02/09/2014 15:31

a little bit, I know I wouldnt want to take meds for something that didnt bother me, however I feel your pain. Would something else work like chuck half a bottle of olbas oil at his pillow case.

Original poster
ClockWatchingLady · 02/09/2014 15:33

Sometimes I'm tempted to chuck a bottle of olbas oil at him...

Good idea though, Dita - thanks

OP posts:
farewellfigure · 02/09/2014 16:29

DH has asthma and is allergic to everything. He uses antihistamines and Beconase and it works a treat. He only snores if he has a cold now. I think for your own mental health you should sit him down and say how much the snoring, sneezing etc is affecting you. Does the snoring wake you up? Maybe he'd understand how debilitating your disturbed sleep is if you really spelled it out?

CarbeDiem · 02/09/2014 17:13

If it's disturbing your sleep then I don't think you are being an arsehole to explain and ask him to take something.

KnackeredMuchly · 02/09/2014 17:36

I took Singulair (Monte Lucast - spelling?) for exactly those symptoms.

Oh it was lovely!!! On prescription from the doctors. I suffer with asthma too.

steff13 · 02/09/2014 18:34

I suffer from terrible allergies, and I could not be without my allergy meds. Zyrtec is my best friend! If he's always had this issue, is it possible he doesn't realize how bad he feels, and how much better he would feel with medication? I finally got on prescription allergy meds when I was in high school, and it was amazing how much better I felt.

I can't stand that snotty, sniffy sound people with congested noses make. It turns my stomach.

ilovepowerhoop · 02/09/2014 18:38

dh takes a daily anti-histamine and a nasal spray all year round due to perennial rhinitus.

Original poster
ClockWatchingLady · 02/09/2014 19:25

Thank you all. I was expecting to be told I was being very unreasonable and he should LTB for interfering.

Sleep-wise I'm actually quite happy to move into the spare room when he snores and snuffles (much as I love him, I also love a bit of space to sleep, so I secretly don't mind the night-time stuff so much).

But in the daytime it drives me potty (and at night when for whatever reason I don't have an escape route). I don't understand how it can not bother him, but I suppose he's just used to tit.

OP posts:
Original poster
ClockWatchingLady · 02/09/2014 19:25

Ahem, used to IT, not tit...

OP posts:
Original poster
ClockWatchingLady · 02/09/2014 19:30

P.S. the reason this was a AIBU is that he thinks I really am. In fact he acts like it's a hurtful rejection of him and his sniffling nose when I (gently) suggest he takes something for it.

OP posts:
steff13 · 02/09/2014 19:33

Would he be willing to try a nasal spray or a neti pot if he doesn't want to take pills? I don't think you're unreasonable to ask him to try antihistimines and see if they make him feel better. If he hates them, I guess he can go back to his sniffy, snotty ways.

Original poster
ClockWatchingLady · 02/09/2014 19:47

Might try that, steff - thanks. Perhaps I'll buy some over the counter and present it when he's in a good mood or pissed

OP posts:
whatever5 · 02/09/2014 20:13

I don't think that it would be fair to try and get him to take antihistamines if he doesn't want to. I would try and get him to find out what the allergy is though as it may be something that he could avoid.

Hassled · 02/09/2014 20:16

Allergic Rhinitis? DH has it - allergies to dust mites + a whole heap of other stuff means he snores and is permanently snotty. He takes a daily anti-histamine and has assorted other sprays etc. It's helped the snot but not so much the snoring.

Your DH is being pretty selfish - it may not bother him, but it clearly bothers you.

jeanmiguelfangio · 02/09/2014 21:28

Do it. My Dh is lovely but god the snot is disgusting. He has post nasal drip due to his allergies and it makes him gag. Makes me want to throw not only the olbas but the shelf we keep the olbas on at him. He has strong horse pills antihistamines and they work a treat. Along with a saline nasal wash I get in boots called sterimar, thats good stuff.

Original poster
ClockWatchingLady · 03/09/2014 11:05

Thanks whatever, Hassled and jean.

jeanmiguel I feel your pain, and envy your horse pills.

OP posts:
Alisvolatpropiis · 03/09/2014 11:30

My DH does this! I thought I was alone in my suffering. Getting him some antihistamines pronto.

Oldraver · 03/09/2014 11:33

I spent 5 hours in a car with someone who sniffed every 15 seconds...I wanted kill him

JessieMcJessie · 03/09/2014 11:54

I have severe dust mite allergy. A steroid nasal spray each morning deals with it really well and I feel a million times better on it. Takes seconds to administer, I do it on autopilot after teeth cleaning. It has no long term side effects (so my doc says). Anthistamines were of absolutely no effect.

However you do have to be consistent with it and take it daily - it's a symptom preventer not a reliever so it takes a few weeks for it to reach peak effectiveness.

Surely for your sake he'd be willing to try somnething like that?

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 03/09/2014 12:13

Boots own brand is on offer at the moment (same as Beconase)
www.boots.com/en/Boots-Hayfever-Relief-50-microgram-Nasal-Spray_1469804/

Just sayin' Wink

I suffer from perennial rhinitis and this helps a lot.

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